Page 91 of Trouble

“It’s got a compass,” I say stupidly, as if he doesn’t already know that. I brush the pads of my fingers over the surface, noting how the gold is raised, making it slightly rugged, just like the man in front of me. I close my eyes, savoring this moment. “Maybe it will help me find my way,” I whisper.

When I open my eyes, Declan is closer. I immediately reach for him, crawling into his lap, the journal still in my hand, and press it against his chest.

“This was?—”

Once again, I’m at a loss for words, but right now, it doesn’t feel debilitating. Words don’t feel necessary. A kiss is all the moment needs. Like our lips know exactly what we both need.

Just like Declan always knows what I need.

CHAPTER 38

Declan

“You sure you have to go?”Cade asks as Melina heads for the door, his lips turned down.

Although Cade wants her to stay, she really should head out. She and Lake have plans with a few other girls in town, and I’m fucking elated about it. She’s making friends in Bristol. Forming attachments outside of us.

It’s hard not to hope that maybe she’ll want to stay. That one day, she might see a life for herself here. With me. With Cade. With us.

I’ve gotten way too ahead of myself. I realize this. I have no idea what my best friend thinks of that idea. In all the years we’ve known each other, he’s never once suggested that he’s interested in settling down.

Even if she wanted to stay, and he wanted to settle down, I can’t even begin to imagine what a relationship would look like. Would our family and friends accept us? It’s one thing for me to come out as bi and dating my best friend. It’s another entirely to show up at my sister’s house with not one but two people. I don’t even want to think about what Beckett would have to say about that.

Is Cade worried about any of this? Or is he only thinking with his dick? Is this really only sex to him?

I watch him as he watches her leave. He’s finally dressed—thank fuck—wearing his signature backward Bolts hat, a long-sleeve Bolts shirt, and black athletic pants. She leans in and whispers, and with a growl, he pulls her in, planting his mouth on hers.

“Really?” he mumbles, releasing her.

Once she’s gone, he finally turns around. When he finds me staring at him, he smirks. “Did you really stick a plug in her ass when I was in the shower?”

Chuckling, I head for the kitchen to grab a water. Only after I ate her out and made her come twice. Giving her the journal felt monumental somehow. I freaked out that she’d freak out and decided to go for what works for us: sex.

She definitely didn’t complain.

“She’ll be ready for you tonight.”

With water bottles in hand, I close the fridge, only to find Cade standing beside me.

“You’re gonna let me have her ass?”

I lift a shoulder. “Figure we can break her in with yours.”

Eyes wide, he scoffs. “You trying to say your cock is bigger than mine?”

A lightness I haven’t felt in a while washes through me as we banter. “You had it in your mouth. You tell me.”

The way he laughs, his head falling back, shocked, probably, at my candor, has me smiling and relaxing.

“You know, you’re actually fucking hilarious when you talk.” With a flick of his wrist, he uncaps his bottle. Then he holds it up between us. “You should do it more.”

I take a sip of my water and wipe my mouth with the back of my hand. “I talk.”

Cade leans against the counter and lifts his chin, assessing me. “To someone other than Liv or Mel.”

I scoff. “I talk to you.”

Lowering his head, he gives it a shake. “Not really.” He roughs a hand over his mouth, thoughtful. “Not for years.”