Page 60 of The Best Number
Luckily, they are caught up in their conversation, and I don’t think they’ve noticed my paralysis. I concentrate on my breathing, closing my eyes for a second to shut everything out. That seems to help and I’m able to move. I turn back to the saladprep and concentrate on that. I don’t know how long it’s been, but I jump when a hand touches my arm.
“You okay, honey? That was a bit of a shock, wasn’t it? I know he’s mentioned the New York thing, but I’d completely forgotten about it, what with me being introduced to his parents and the big talk the other week.”
“Where’s Jack?” I ask, looking for him.
“He’s just gone back to his to drop his work stuff off and get changed. He did say but I don’t think you heard him." She's looking at me with sad eyes. I heave a big sigh. My eyes are prickling, but I refuse to let a tear form. I resolve to cast any emotion to the side and get through tonight, celebrating with these two awesome humans.
“I’m okay, Mac,” I whisper in her ear as I hug her tight. “Just overwhelmed with all the news. Let’s celebrate my two favourite people in the world. I promise I’ll snap myself out of it.”
“Tom, you don’t have to snap yourself out of it. It’s perfectly normal to have feelings and big emotions. I’m here. You can talk to me.” She tries to push me, but I shake my head with a wry smile.
“Not today, Cassidy. Let me do it my way. And that means celebrating in the best way we can.” I don’t want Jack to come back in and realise I’m upset. I will take the time later to let the feelings out, just like I’ve always done. There’s no need to tangle Jack and Cassidy up in them. I refuse to dull their celebratory buzz.
“Okay, we’ll do it your way. But I’m here for you. I want to support you through this. You and me, we can get through this together. I’m going to miss him too.” She gives me a tight squeeze. She must realise that’s all I’m willing to say on the matter because, as she pulls away, she looks over at the dinner prep. “You gonna teach me how to make gnocchi now?” she asks with a grin.
Ten minutes later, Jack reappears in casual clothes and finds Cassidy and I covered in flour and surrounded by little gnocchi dumplings. He watches, propped against the kitchen counter, as we finish prepping before I show Cassidy how to cook them. We all work together to get the dinner ready. Jack gets out plates and cutlery and serves some of the salad I made. Once the gnocchi is cooked, we toss it with butter and sage, adding it to the plates. Jack produces a bottle of champagne from somewhere and pops the cork to pour each of us a glass. We stand together in Cassidy’s little kitchen and raise our glasses in a toast.
“To finishing the book,” I say to Cassidy.
“To new adventures,” she says to Jack.
He turns to me and gives me a heated look and then, “To the best damn fuck buddies in the world.”
I grit my teeth as we all clink our glasses together. They precede me out of the kitchen, and I take a big gulp of my champagne before I follow.Fuck buddies. Wow,I think sarcastically to myself.I thought we were more than that.
Once we’ve eaten and chatted, Jack clears away the plates. I’m grateful to Cassidy for propping up the conversation and getting all the details of the New York trip out of Jack. He sounds excited about the project he will be working on and also spending time in New York City, which I know he’s wanted to visit for a long time.
I know I’m happy for him, but I’m sad for myself as well. This relatively short run of the three of us, all being together, has been incredible. I have been content for a while now. The uncertainty of what will happen next churns in my stomach.
I watch Jack and Cassidy interact, and they look beautiful together. It makes me wonder what people see when they see the three of us. Does that make as much sense as Cassidy and Jack do together? Or will our unconventional relationship always look weird to other people? And does it even matter now Jack is leaving?
“I can’t expect you guys to wait for me, but I hope you’ll continue to see each other when I leave.” Jack’s face is a picture of seriousness, an unusual look for him.
“We can chat on the phone and stay in touch,” Cassidy suggests. “Just because you’re in New York doesn’t mean you miss out on all my inane stories, Jack. And I can keep filling you in on all the dirty things Tom does to me.” She gives him a saucy wink.
“I mean it. This time together has been incredible and made me realise that one failed relationship doesn’t mean I have to stay single forever. You both mean a lot to me. I want you both to be happy.”
“Well, I’m not going anywhere. How about you Tom?”
I stare into Cassidy’s gaze. “Staying right here, Mac.”
“So we carry on, even though this one…” she gestures with her thumb to Jack. “Is deserting us?”
“Sounds good to me.” I can’t bring myself to look at Jack or to offer to wait for him. But I don’t have to as Cassidy decides it’s time for some fun.
She leaves her place by Jack’s side and comes over, straddling my lap. She places her hands on either side of my face, bending down for a French kiss. Her tongue pokes against the seam of my lips, encouraging me to open up and, when I do, she turns feral. She reaches down, pulling at my t-shirt, breaking away from the kiss briefly to pull it over my head.
My hands work their way over her back. She grinds her hips and my cock is suddenly on high alert, ready for a slice of the action.
“You guys look so fucking tempting,” comes Jack’s drawl from the side. I open my eyes to find him pulling his t-shirt over his head. He stands up and his shorts hit the floor.Huh, no underwear. Interesting.He takes his hardening cock in hand, giving it a few lazy pumps as he watches us. “You two are wearing too many clothes.”
He comes closer, easing Cassidy back, and tilting her chin back to give her an upside-down kiss. He helps her up, getting to work stripping her of her clothes. He glances at me as he does so. “Strip,” is all he says.
He sounds bossy. That’s usually my job.I decide to let it fly and see where he wants to take this.
We stand in Cassidy’s lounge, stark naked. Cassidy takes hold of my cock in one hand and Jack’s in the other, pumping us slowly at the same time. “Such a good girl,” I tell her with a purr.
“Let’s take this through to the bedroom.”