Page 42 of Deadly North
“Oh…” Her voice trails off. “Mack…”
“Look. You don’t have to feel the same. But —”
“But that’s just it,” she says. “I do. I do feel the same.”
Now it’s my turn to be surprised. “You do?”
“Yeah.” She sniffles. “I’ve had a crush on you as long as I can remember.”
“What? You hate me. You’ve always hated me. Hell, you just told me you hated me because of that thing with Brock what’s-his-face in high school.”
She lifts a shoulder. “I was embarrassed. He was the first guy that ever got me to stop mooning around, thinking about you. And then you ruined it. But it was never really about Brock.”
“Okay, we need to stop talking about fucking Brock.” I take her hands in mine. “G, listen to me. I love you. I can’t just have you take off, without knowing where you are.”
Her eyes are shimmering. “You keep saying that. Don’t do that unless you mean it.”
“I one-hundred percent fucking mean it.”
“It’s just…” She lets out a long, shuddering breath. “I’ve only ever been serious about one other guy before, and it ended badly. Very badly. It kind of scarred me, to be honest.”
“How so?”
“Did Con ever tell you about a guy named Dylan I was seeing, years ago?”
A memory bubbles up in my brain. I remember Fury and me getting drunk as fuck at some dive bar one hazy night long ago. He told me Gigi had gotten mixed up with some lowlife and that he had “taught the guy a lesson.” The look on Fury’s face was one I hadn’t ever seen before. I didn’t need to ask him any questions about what he’d done to the guy who hurt Gigi. Because I was pretty sure I knew.
“Yeah. I remember that.”
“He beat me. Bloody, black and blue.”
Fuck. Hot rage boils in my veins. I should have been there with Fury. I should have been there to see that the man who hurt Gigi suffered before he was sent straight to hell. My fists clench so tight the knuckles turn white. But then Gigi glances down at them, and the flash of fear in her eyes tells me I need to get hold of myself.
“That’s fucking rough, G,” I say, choking back my rage.
She swallows. “It was the only time I’ve ever let myself get close to a man. I’ve never had another relationship since. And frankly, I’m scared. I’m scared to feel what I’m feeling for you. I’m scared of relationships, Mack. I don’t know how to do them.”
I slide onto the bed next to her. “Well, I ain’t exactly an expert, either. Most of the women I’ve been with I couldn’t tell you their names if we passed them on the damn sidewalk.”
She snorts. “Well, that’s reassuring.”
“It should be.” I put a finger under her chin and tilt her face up to mine. “I’ve never even given any other woman but you a second damn thought, Gigi. You think you had this crush on me back then, that I never even knew you existed. The fact is, I absolutely knew you fucking existed. The only thing that’s ever stopped me from trying to get in your pants was the fact that you’re my best friend’s sister.”
Now, Gigi throws her head back in a full-throated laugh. “You romantic, you!”
“Look, maybe that’s not very romantic-sounding, but it’s the truth. Maybe it’s a blessing in disguise, though. Back then, I absolutely would have tried to fuck you. But I was also too damn immature to not have made a complete disaster of the whole thing afterwards. My little head did too much of my thinking for me back then. I couldn’t have been a good boyfriend to you.” My eyes lock onto hers. “But I can be now.”
Her chin trembles, all amusement gone. “This is turning out to be a pretty serious conversation.”
“It is,” I agree. “Now do you see why you can’t leave?”
“No.” She shakes her head emphatically. “That’s exactly why Ihaveto leave, don’t you see? I can’t put you in danger. Didn’t you hear me about what Blaze threatened to do?”
I don’t even think, I just say the words. “If you’re leaving, I’m coming with you.”
“You’d do that? You’d leave your club? Your brothers?”
“Yes. I would. Iwill.”