Page 32 of A Vow of Shadows
“Decidedly not.”
Right. Well… “While we are on the subject of things said this morning, you mentioned bathing.” He opened his mouth to speak, but I held up a hand. “I did stumble across the bathing chambers on my self-guided tour. However, I’m embarrassed toadmit we had running water back home. I’m afraid I don’t…” I trailed off, ashamed to finish the thought.
His face lit with understanding, quickly concealing the hint of shock that arched his brows. “You don’t know how to draw yourself a bath?”
I cast my eyes down, certain this was the height of humiliation. Forget falling on my arse in the rain outside of school and having to endure the entire day with a mud-stained backside. Revealing to the Ferrier of Souls that I was too pampered to know how to bathe myself had my insides turning to melted wax.
The Ferrier’s eyes gleamed with mischief as the smirk reappeared on his lips. “Are you asking me to help you bathe, Miss Fil’Owen?”
My toes curled, and I was suddenly very aware of our proximity. Though it seemed inconsequential, I realized I’d made no effort to hide my shadows around him. I resisted the urge to duck my chin, staring defiantly back into the Ferrier’s dark eyes, but his gaze never strayed to my marked side.
My face heated at his unwavering attention. I couldn’t tell if his question had been in jest, but I did truly need his help if I had any intention of bathing in the next year.
“I am asking for your assistance inrunninga bath,” I clarified. “I assure you, I am quite capable of cleaning myself.”
He chuckled and something stirred deep in my belly.
“Grab something clean to wear and meet me at the bathing chambers. I’d be happy to assist you.”
The Ferrier turned and strode from the room, darkness following in his wake.
Chapter 25
The Ferrier
My shadows were restless. They sensed my desire to pace and fidget even as I willed my body to calm. I leaned against the wall outside the bathing chamber, arms and legs crossed in what might be seen as a casual gesture but was really the only way I saw fit to constrain the energy winding its way through my veins.
I’d regretted my outburst this morning the moment the words had left my lips, but she hadn’t pursued me, hadn’t returned to her room at all. I listened all morning for the sound of her light footsteps, for news from my shadows that she’d retired. All for naught. She’d slept in the library to avoid the monster of the house.
I’d lashed out, but I knew better. It wasn’t her fault she’d been here when I needed space. It wasn’t her fault I would suffer this task for eternity unless my debt could be paid.Shewas helping to pay that debt. I should be grateful for her presence, not punishing her.
When I’d finally worked up the courage to seek her out, I’d nearly come undone at the sight of her sleep-mussed. It broughtme no small amount of joy to vex her, to stoke that fire of hers that thawed a part of me that had been frozen far too long.
Then she’d mentioned bathing and my mind had immediately conjured images of her slipping off her clothes, her chestnut waves fanning out around her as the water obscured her more intimate areas.
My shadows grew still, alerting me to Katrin’s approach before I could sense her. I swallowed thickly. When had I started thinking of her asKatrin?
She appeared around the corner before I could wrap my brain around the change.
“Miss Fil’Owen,” I said more for my peace of mind than to welcome her.
“LordFerry,” she sighed, trudging down the hall with her arms burdened by a heap of dark cloth.
As she neared, I gestured to the clothing in her arms. “Allow me.”
I crooked two fingers, and one of my shadows sprang forward to relieve her. She cocked a brow at it before handing over the bundle.
“Are they your slaves?” she asked. Her fingers stretched toward the one that held her clothes.
“I don’t care for that word.”
“It doesn’t matter if you like it if that’s what they are.”
I considered the idea. “No, they are not slaves. Not exactly.” I glanced at the living shadows that haunted my steps. “I hardly notice their presence anymore. Not like you do, I mean. They’re like the fingers of my hand. I know they are there. I use them regularly. In fact, I would sorely miss their usefulness were I to lose them, but they aren’t at the forefront of my mind if that makes sense. In some part, they are an extension of me, of my power as the Ferrier. Our relationship is symbiotic. I do something for them, and they do things for me.”
She squinted at the shadow, tilting her head to one side as she regarded it. “Are they sentient?”
“If you’d have asked me before you arrived, I’d have said no. They are more alive with you here. I’m not positive to what extent they can think for themselves, but they seem to have emotional responses to stimuli.” I watched as the shadow turned an approximation of a head to mirror Katrin. “And personal agendas,” I added, remembering the way they’d shepherded me into her father’s study.