Page 13 of My Turn
The dreams were fucking strange. I assumed they stemmed from that conversation we had the other day about kidnapping and masks because that was essentially what I’d seen.
A man in a black mask and a hood was in my bed pleasuring me- eating my fucking pussy.
How’s that for unbelievable? If someone actually broke into my home, there’s no way they’d come in, get me off, then leave. I even looked around for anything suspicious before I left because it had felt so real. It was foggy, though. My head had been swimming when I’d looked down and seen him between my legs and I couldn’t even get my eyes to focus all the way. There could’ve been three identical men for all I knew.
It was strange, that was for sure. Sex dreams weren’t a new occurrence for me, but they hadn’t happened since Jake died. I hadn’t thought about sex at all, really. Maybe once or twice, but I didn’t like to think about that because they all happened when I was around Jayce. It was wrong and stupid. I wanted to attribute it to him looking like Jake, but if I was being honest, I’d looked at him even before that. How couldn’t I? He was beautiful.
Yeah, that was weird too. They were identical twins, so I shouldn’t have looked at him and found him beautiful in a different way than his brother, but I did.
I’d been around them long enough to tell the difference. Jayce had a small scar above his lip and his face was more expressive. Oftentimes, he looked stoic and intense, but it was easy to get him to smile and laugh. He loved to tease and have fun. Jake used to, but over the years, we settled into something more reserved and… I didn’t want to say boring, but it sort of was. That was what happened in relationships, though. Things calmed down. You didn’t play around as much as you used to and it got comfortable. There wasn’t anything wrong with that.
Except, apparently there was. At some point, Jake had gone out and had a whole fucking baby. I didn’t know how long ago because the lawyer wouldn’t give me specific information about the other recipients of his life insurance.
Was it in college? Recently? Had he still been seeing this woman up until he died? I had so many questions I simultaneously did and didn’t want the answers to.
Someone had to know. I was afraid to reach out to his parents because if they didn’t know, I’d be tarnishing their opinion about him. It felt like enough that me and Jayce had to feel that disappointment in him. I didn’t want to. The man was dead, but he’d cheated on me, so I couldn’t really help it.
If I told them, they might even want to meet this kid. After all, it was their grandchild. The thought of that made me nauseous. Did Jayce want that? He had a niece or nephew out there somewhere. He didn’t want his own kids, but he always interacted with his younger cousins when he saw them and after one of them had a baby, he stole the little thing for all of Thanksgiving dinner. He was amazing with children. This was a piece of his brother and there was a chance he’d want to be involved. It was his decision and I couldn’t try to influence what he chose to do.
The bell rang, drawing me out of my musings and triggering a sharp pain behind my eyes.
“Don’t forget we’re starting presentations for your ancient civilizations project on Monday!” I called as everyone darted for the door. When the room was empty, I slumped in my seat with a groan. It was my free period and I seriously considered using it to nap, but if I wanted to avoid doing work tomorrow, I needed to get these things out of the way. I’d meant to grade midterms yesterday after the appointment with the lawyer but for obvious reasons, that didn’t happen.
My phone buzzed and I narrowed my eyes at it before I flipped it over.
Jayce:Boo.
Alana:*gasp* So scary. Maybe you should up your Halloween game.
The door flew open and I screamed. The phone tumbled to the floor and I almost fell out of my seat. A grinning Jayce stood there with two iced coffees. If he wasn’t holding those, I’d probably try to slam his face into the corner of my desk.
“Scary enough for you?” he asked as he set the drink down in front of me.
“That was completely unnecessary.”
“I beg to differ. You look on the verge of death.”
“Yeah, I am, and that little stunt didn’t help.”
He stuck his lower lip out in a pout. “You’re not happy to see me.”
“Not one bit.” Even as I said it, my lips tried to betray my amusement.
“Yeah, you’re ecstatic. You can’t lie to me. I see right through you, Alana.”
His voice took on a deeper tone when he said my name. I studied him, trying to determine if something was up. He looked normal. Black t-shirt, jeans, and stylish boots. His hair was unstyled, which allowed a few wavy black strands to fall over his forehead. He kept it longer than Jake had and I’d always liked it.
“Sugar free,” he said, nodding toward the coffee. “With protein and an extra shot.”
“But I want sugar.”
“That’s the last thing you need after all that wine. Would I ever steer you wrong?”
“Yeah,” I muttered before I took a sip.
With a chuckle, he leaned back against the desk. He was so close that I could smell him. His scent was like tobacco and vanilla, but not in a gross way. It was rugged and inviting, even though those weren’t two words I’d use to describe him in mostcases. He was sweet and charismatic, but most people wouldn’t come up to him if they didn’t know him. He looked like he could knock someone out with a single glare.
After high school, Jake didn’t maintain his muscle from when he played sports, but Jayce did. He was bulkier than he had been back then, with biceps that looked too big for any shirt he wore and abs that could give a bitch a concussion. I only knew that because he dragged me to the lake during the warm months. Since I didn’t work in the summer, he made me go often, especially this year. I’d been grateful for it. Staying idle didn’t help with the grief and depression.