Page 90 of The Brigadier

“At least I’ve had a couple today. I can’t promise anything else.”

“Stop being hard on yourself. All three of us allowed our worlds and our practices to become soft. For a period of time, we resort to the old ways.”

“Agreed.”

CHAPTER 25

Chantel

Anxiety.

I remained riddled with it, loathing seeing so many soldiers walking and guarding the house. I’d realized over an hour before, something either terrible or tragic must have occurred, every single remaining soldier located somewhere on the perimeter.

At least Damien hadn’t noticed and in truth, I was grateful he’d requested swimming in the heated pool. I’d donned a suit, hoping being in the water with him, frolicking with the beach balls and noodles would bring me out of the funk I was in. But I realized quickly, that just wasn’t possible.

I was likely more on edge than all the soldiers combined.

There was something nagging at me, which in truth had given me a horrific headache Tylenol hadn’t taken away.

Damien giggled when a beach ball hit me in the head, finally drawing my attention away from the darkness.

I snapped my head around, gasping. “You mischievous boy. I’ll get you for that.” I made certain to keep my funny voice he seemed to like so much. It usually sent him into a fit of giggles.

I scooped him up, spinning him around in the shallow end. I’d insisted on a life vest, which had been the first thing he’d fought. But given my state of mind and the possibility of interference or worse, I would risk nothing.

The little boy was too precious, a son I’d love to have.

Oh, boy. I was jumping in with two feet into the deep end. Presumptiveness wasn’t a strong suit for anyone.

Including the man I was having so much difficulty ignoring. It wasn’t all physical either, or chemistry or whatever someone would call it. I cared about him. Peeling away the various onion layers had shown me so many incredible sides.

“You little minion, you.” He was flopping his hands in the water, his smile as bright as the sun.

When I managed to lift him from the water, tossing him gently, his face lit up like firecrackers. I took the opportunity to swim toward the side. This was so close to paradise it was insane. Yet I doubted either Nikolay or I could relax for a lengthy period of time.

Could I ever?

That was a tough question. Maybe the wives of high-ranking men and mob bosses became used to being under the gun pretty much all the time. I guess you got used to anything after a long enough period of time.

Or if you were in love.

Love. There was that word again.

An old-fashioned oversized clock had been installed on the exterior wall, which allowed me to know Damien would need a snack soon. Another hour, maybe a nap. If Nikolay wasn’t back by then, I would lose my ever-loving mind.

I turned and rested my head on my folded arms, watching the little boy now happily playing by himself. I’d found some crazy eighties music station, hoping it would keep my mind occupied. Even Madonna or Journey hadn’t perked up my mood.

At least I was comfy in the water, enjoying kicking my legs and pretending to relax.

Suddenly, raw electricity flowed right to my core. I jerked up my head, shading my eyes and searching what I could see of the house. The reflection was brutal enough, my efforts were useless. At least what I felt wasn’t fear. It was… hunger.

That was the moment the man, my man walked from the shadows, leaning against the doorjamb leading into the kitchen. He adored not only surprising me but also making a grand entrance. Well, he didn’t need to do much to draw my attention. The electric prickles were still racing through me.

I was attempting to jump out as I sensed something was wrong. The man’s jaw was too clenched.

But Damien was faster than lightning. “Daddy. Daddy. Daddy. Chantie taught me how to swim.”

Chantie. Now I had a cute nickname. I loved it.