Page 9 of Duty and Desire
Why have I gotten myself into this? I’ve set myself up for an evening of torture now.
The rest of that afternoon, Ros hadn’t been able to focus no matter how hard she tried. Scarlett Bennett, in her quarters tonight. She couldn’t get the thought out of her head.
Dinner had come and gone, and Ros had sat stoically at her desk, papers in hand. She hadn’t been able to read a single sheet, her head so full, so overwhelmed, so confused. Why had she done this to herself? No other pretty soldier had ever caught her attention like this before. She had always kept her head down, kept working, kept progressing. She’d had no time for romance, not even dalliances. What was so different about Captain Bennett? The woman intrigued her. She seemed so fearless—fearless enough to disobey her—but so human and caring at the same time. Ros couldn’t understand her, couldn’t wrap her mind around her own fascination, though she wouldn’t mind wrapping herself around the figment of her obsession.
God, why couldn’t she get her out of her head? And why wasn’t she here yet?
A rap at the door saved Ros from further spiraling. She shot up from her chair, scraping the legs across the hard floor. She hadn’t changed out of her uniform. Was that a good thing? Would Scarlett think that was strange? No, it would help her keep her distance. This was a celebratory drink between two colleagues, that was all. She tugged at her jacket and ran a hand over her cropped silver hair, smoothing it into submission.
With a centering breath, she pulled the door open. Scarlett was looking down the hallway, her hands clasped behind her back. She was in her fatigues, and her auburn hair was tied back.
She looked back to where Ros was standing.
“Good evening, General.”
“Good evening, Captain.”
“May I come in?”
“Oh, yes, of course.” Ros stumbled over her words, realizing she was blocking the captain from entering. “Come in, come in. Make yourself comfortable.” She waved the younger woman inside, only now realizing just how barren her quarters were.
Ros gestured toward the couch and dragged her desk chair over to sit opposite her. She didn’t dare risk sharing the couch, not with the possibilities her mind had been conjuring earlier.
An uncomfortable silence settled between them, both women acutely aware of the undercurrent that had been growing stronger with each passing day. Finally, Ros gestured toward the small table where she had set out two glasses and a bottle of whiskey. “I thought we could toast to our success.”
Scarlett hesitated for only a moment before nodding. “I’d like that.”
They sat across from each other, the whiskey smooth and warm as it slid down their throats. The silence stretched on, heavy with unspoken words. Ros found herself staring at Scarlett, her mind a tumult of emotions she had tried so hard to bury. This woman—so capable, so sharp—was becoming more than just a trusted officer to her. And that realization terrified her.
“To a successful mission.”
“Agreed, to a successful mission,” Scarlett echoed back as they clinked their glasses together, the ringing filling the otherwise silent room.
“So, Captain, how are you settling in at Fort Independence? Finding your feet okay?” Ros asked, questing around for some kind of casual conversation to fill the awkward pause that was sure to build.
“Yes, thank you, General. I’m settling in well. It’s been good to jump right in. If I hadn’t been so busy, I think it would have been more nerve-wracking.”
“So, you prefer risking your life to having make conversation. A woman after my own heart. And please, we are in my quarters; you’re not on duty. Call me Ros.”
“Yes, Gener—Ros. But if I’m calling you Ros, you’d better call me Scarlett. It would be very odd for me to be the only one keeping rank.” She laughed.
“Very well then, Scarlett.” The name felt foreign in her mouth. Though it had filled her thoughts for some time now, she hadn’t allowed herself to call the captain by her name, fearful it might lead to her own integrity slipping.
A silence settled between them, Ros too caught up in her own thoughts to notice.
“So, I hear you’re new to the base as well, Ros. How are you finding things?”
“Oh, well, everything has been running smoothly. Though these insurgents making themselves a nuisance isn’t the most peaceful thing to establish command under.”
“Ha. I can imagine. Still, from what I hear, the boots think you’re doing a good job.”
“Ah, I won’t ask for gossip. As much as a part of me wants to know, I don’t think it’s fair on the soldiers. Or on you for that matter. Can’t establish trust within your company if they can’t bellyache about command. It’s not that long ago I was in their shoes, and I certainly had plenty to grumble about. I don’t begrudge anyone their complaints.”
“Fair enough.”
Ros cringed; she’d killed that line of conversation. She’d never been good at this.
“How did you end up in the military?” Scarlett blurted.