Page 11 of Sweet Dreams
“Listen to me, Teagan.” He stares deep into my eyes, never letting go of my chin. “I can’t give you all my trust, but know I wouldn’t lie to you.”
“What does that mean? Either I get it all or none. I’m sorry, Silas, but I can’t risk getting hurt because you can’t open up.”
He nods, letting me go. “I understand. I won’t push anything if that’s what you want.”
My heart sinks. Will Silas never talk to me again if I tell him that’s what I want? I still want to be friends, but to take things further can’t happen unless he can open up. I have to protect myself. I’m so lost at what to do.
“I’ll stillbe your friend if you're worried about that. I just won’t push for extra.” He cups my cheek, rubbing his thumb against my skin and smiles.
The tension in my shoulders melts away. “Thank you. I enjoy your friendship, Sunshine—more than you know.”
“Alright then. Tell me what my job entails today, boss.” He steps outside of the storage room and waits for me.
While he’s in the shop, I’ll treat him like an employee and strictly that. I’ll have to shelve whatever feelings I have for now.
I feellike an asshole. I could’ve been honest and told Teagan about my past, but it’s for her safety that I keep things bottled up. I don’t want my shit to land on her shoulders. A half-truth is better than no truth, in my opinion. And if anything happened to Teagan because of me. I wouldn’t be able to forgive myself.
I watch Teagan work, knowing I almost caused her to lose this entire shop today. I can’t control what comes out of my mouth sometimes. But Teagan was right; Nancy is a cunt. I needed to scare her, and she can’t keep getting away with this shit.
Whoever this Montgomery family is, they can’t have that much of a hold on this town. There’s no way. The mayor has to be doing his job, or what’s the point of having one? She has to be blowing the mayor to be getting away with all this shit, or she wouldn’t be in office still. And what the fuck does her husband do?
“Silas?” her voice comes out alarmed.
I turn and come face to face with Elma. The old bat stares at me, judging me. I know it; she knows it. I don’t belong here but jokes on her. I’m not leaving.
“How can I help you today, Elma?” I smile down at her.
“What are you doing here?”
Oh, I love playing these games. “I work here. Didn’t you know that?”
“No.”
I drop my bottom lip in a pout before smiling in victory. “Wow. Something the rumour queen doesn’t know. I’m shocked, to be honest. You must be slacking, Elma.”
“You should watch what you say, Silas. I could ruin your life.”
“I doubt that. I ruin my own life just by breathing. If you think I’m afraid of an old lady that spreads shit around town worse than a farmer spreading manure, you’re wrong. Now find a book or leave.”
Her jaw hits the floor, and her eyes nearly pop out of her head. I’m gonna go out on a limb and assume no one talks like that to her. Good thing I don’t hold back. Sugar-coating shit isn’t in my vocabulary. The way she’s still staring at me makes me feel victorious. Gossip is the worst kind.
Elma narrows her eyes at me, moving closer to me. “You’d best be watching yourself. I have ways of discovering things you don’t want others to know.” She glances at Teagan.
“Don’t drag anyone into things you have no business in.”
“I’ll give you one warning, don’t hurt her.”
A warning coming from a seventy-year-old is hilarious; what’s the worst she’s gonna do to me, beat me with a cane? I’m not worried one little bit. I turn my back and get back to stocking books. The more I ignore her, the better. She’ll figure it out eventually that threats don’t work on me, and I don’t scare easily.
The burner phone I keep on me vibrates in my back pocket—another reminder of my past. No matter how much I want to answer it, I can’t. I promised myself not to return to that life and am determined to keep it that way, even though some days are more challenging to say no.
Life in Holden isn’t exciting, but I’m trying to make it work. It’s safe, and right now, I need that. I can’t get shot on the streets here, and that’s a win in my books. I’m afraid what would happen if I did go back to the city; my ass would be grass.
I definitely didn’t see myself getting a job in a bookstore. This came out of left field, but I’m glad I took it. Even if she doesn’t want things to move beyond friendship, at least I’ll have her like this. Being this close to Teagan is perfect. But it isn’t everything; that’s why something else comes out at night.
If she ever discovered my secret, she would never trust me, considering that trust is already walking a thin line. What friendship we have would be gone, and I wouldn’t be able to handle it. I need Teagan in my life no matter how I get it, even if I steal it little by little.
“Silas? Did you scare away Elma?”