Page 57 of See Her
27
MAYZIE
Over the next two weeks, we settle into a blissful routine. I try to get as much work done as I can in the mornings while Jack is still sleeping after working a bar shift so that we can have the afternoons together. We take walks with the dogs, have lunch, and have sexy time before he goes to work. On his days off, we hang out in the house, sometimes we’re both doing our own thing, but we’re together. He likes to fix things like creaky doors and uneven window sills, and he’s put up shelves for both my books and his vinyl collection.
We also made a point of bringing the families together by grilling out in our backyard, and it went about how you’d expect. Jack grilled steaks while my dad grilledhimabout whether he’s ever done drugs or been arrested and if he got straight As in school. My brother’s girlfriend clung to his arm and griped in his ear about how quickly Jack proposed and what was taking him so long while he chugged a beer, his eyes lifted to the heavens. Jack’s sister, Sarah, sat with her husband, Mike, at the picnic table and shoveled chips in her mouth as she watched all the conversations like she was at the movies.
The saving grace was Jack’s dad, Bill, who sat down with my parents for a heart–to–heart. While assuring them that he was just as caught off guard and full of questions as they were, he expressed his feelings about how he knows first–hand that life is short. My Dad and Mom softened just a little after he told them how he certainly never planned on losing Jack’s mom, and how he supports seizing happiness before it slips from your hands. It didn’t make them come all the way around, but they were a bit more open to listening to him go on about how good of a guy Jack really is.
It's going to take time, but it made me feel optimistic with moving forward and building bonds, and I’ve been able to relax as Jack and I have been finding a domestic routine.
I always wake up slightly as he climbs into bed with me late at night, and the most wonderful feeling comes over me every time. I’m immediately wrapped in a blanket of love and security that I didn’t know I was missing. There is something about being in that state of half–sleep and feeling his warmth settling next to me. Sometimes I wake up all the way, and we do amazing things to each other. Others, I settle back into sleep with the comfort of him being there.
What we don’t do is look See Her up on the internet. We watched the video the one time the label sent us a link so we could view the final product. It was surreal yet invigorating to see Jack, me, and the guys in a video that was going to be viewed around the country. As discussed, there were occasional shots of me, but not enough to take the attention off the guys. The scene in the St. Michelle is intense with the way they showed Jack shredding the shit out of his guitar while watching me dance, and what I didn’t expect was the special effect added in at the end.The videographer made it look like the theater was crumbling and falling apart all around the band, as if by the sheer force of their music. It is truly a work of art.
After the first viewing, we haven’t watched it again, or checked the music charts. Jack is afraid he will become obsessed and would rather just go on with life and find out when the time is right, if we hear anything at all that is. He figures that if we don’t hear anything, it will be less of a blow that way.
But one night, it seems he can’t run from it anymore. He comes home from the bar at 10:30, when he was supposed to stay late and close.
“Hey, what are you doing home?” I ask from the nook where I’m working on my laptop.
“Well,” he says, shucking his jacket and hanging it behind the door on the coat rack. “There was a huge crowd, but they weren’t there to drink.”
“What does that mean?” I ask, closing my laptop.
“Apparently, the song is doing well,” he says, unbuttoning his shirt and pulling it out of the top of his pants so it can hang open. “Locals that know me from the shows are getting a bit excited.” He bends down to kiss me before heading to the fridge and getting out two beers.I feel a little zing go up my back at the new but comfortable gesture, and then sigh.It’s like a little reminder that we really are married.“You’d think having a huge crowd would be good for business, but no one was ordering anything,” he continues. “All they wanted to do was bombard me with questions and shit.” He pops the beers open as I walk over to grab one from him. “I had to leave out the back because it got too out of hand. I’m not sure I can go back there. I mean itcoulddie down, but I don’t know…” he trails off as he tips the bottle back. We head over to the couch as he keeps talking.“On the plus side, I got to come home to you earlier,” he says as we sit down and both put our feet up.
“It’s a very welcome surprise,” I tell him as he settles down, leaning in on me a bit with his hand wrapped around my bare thigh. I’d changed into a t-shirt and pajama shorts a while ago. We both take a drink as we hear his phone go off. He leans forward to set his beer down, leaning even further into me to fish his phone out of his back pocket.He glances at the screen before bringing it to his ear, his other hand still rubbing my thigh,subtly stirring up some feelings of comfort and arousal, whether he means it to or not.
“Matt,” he answers, “you wouldn’t believe what just happened.” And then he’s quiet as a look of disbelief comes over his face…
“You okay, sweetheart?”
I look up to see Jack leaning against the fridge, his eyes holding numerous layers of concern.
“Yeah, I’m fine,” I briefly shoot him a smile before looking back down at the pan I’m scrubbing the shit out of. “Why?”
“You look like your mind’s somewhere else. And you’re going to put a hole in that pan.”
My heart starts to beat faster at the mention of it, though I try to cover it up with a giggle as I dry my hands on a towel.
“We got some amazing news last night,” I reason. “A lot’s about to change. You’re probably going out on tour, you know?”
I don’t tell him about all the things that are scaring me; that how the idea of him taking off to a different league of existence makes me worry about being left behind. But I will not ruin this moment for him by making it about me, and I won’t be the woman that holds him back from realizing dreams he’s had since long before meeting me.
Jack blinks and raises his eyebrows at my musings. “Maybe. We’ll see what Ron has to say on this call. Do you want to go with me?”he asks.
The guys are all meeting at Matt’s to take the call.
“This is a band thing. You go ahead.” I step lightly towards him and rest my hands on his chest and he wraps his arms around my waist.
“It has to do with our future, which means it involves you, too.”
“You’re right, but the other guys may not see it that way. Let’s give them a chance to get used to that idea. It’s been just the four of you for so long.”
“M’kay,” he plants a kiss on my lips before turning towards the door, giving me a last glance over his shoulder. “I’ll come straight back home.”
“I can’t wait,” I respond, smiling serenely back.