Page 133 of Outback Secrets
Could he lie to her? He knew what the nightmare meant. It was his subconscious reminding him that he could lose her too. And he’d heard her stories, heard about her brush with death up north, knew it was possible.
‘Yeah,’ he admitted after a few long moments. ‘I’m terrified. Almost as terrified as I am about me hurting you.’
‘I’ll get a job in Bunyip Bay,’ she said, complete conviction in her voice. ‘I could help you here, at the pub?’
He only hesitated a moment. ‘No fucking way. That would only happen over my dead body! You’re not stopping flying. This only works—we only work—if you keep doing what you love. I won’t let you change who you are in your soul because of me. It’s me who needs to change. I need to grow some balls and start living properly again. And I will.’
‘I would give up flying for you,’ she said, ‘but I love that you won’t let me. I promise I will fly the safest I ever have. I’ll triple check everything and I won’t ever take any stupid risks. Okay?’
He nodded and rolled over so they were face to face. ‘I know you won’t, because now you won’t just have your mother, but also me to deal with if you do.’
She laughed and kissed him on the lips. ‘But you have to promise me one thing in return too.’
‘Anything.’
‘If you ever feel even the slightest bit low, you’ll call me. If I’m not available because I’m in the air, you’ll leave a message and I’ll call you back the minute I touch the ground.’
‘Deal.’
‘Promise me you won’t try and handle your demons alone anymore.’
‘I promise.’
‘Also … you said you saw a therapist?’
‘Yeah, a couple of times, in Colorado. Didn’t really help.’
‘I think you should try someone again,’ she said. ‘Maybe the first therapist wasn’t right or maybe you weren’t ready, but you’ve still got things to work through. I’m here for you—always—but I’m not an expert and I … Please, just give it another shot. There’s no shame in asking for help.’
‘Didn’t I just say I’d do anything for you?’
‘Yes, but I want you to do this for yourself as well.’
He nodded. ‘I’ll call someone tomorrow.’
‘Well, I’m not sure you’ll be able to find anyone open tomorrow, but next business day works for me.’
‘Tuesday then.’ He pulled her close, unable to recall ever having such a raw and honest conversation. But with Henri it felt okay, more than okay. It felt right. ‘You know absolutely everything about me now,’ he said.
‘Good. Because I don’t want there ever to be any secrets between us.’
‘Me either.’ He kissed her forehead and then reached across to switch off the lamp. ‘But now I think we should try and get some more sleep.’
‘That, Liam Castle, is the best idea you’ve ever had.’