Page 60 of Under Their Watch
“Sweetie, I need for you to-”
“No!” I scream again. “I don’t want to be here. I have no one left. Don’t you fucking get it? I didn’t want to survive. I wanted to be with them, and you fucking took that from me.”
I grab my pillow and sling it across the room before realizing I have leads attached to my body. I start ripping at the cords, wanting to get the fuck out of this hospital. The nurse is trying to calm me down, but every time she comes near me, I grab some thing and sling it at her. She hits a button on the wall, and it prompts other nurses and doctors to come in.
“Don’t fucking touch me!” I yell.
“Rhea,” the doctor says with a stern voice. “Stop and listen to me. Please.”
“What?” I seethe. “I don’t want to fucking be here.”
“I understand. Your father is here. A nurse called him and he is on his way up. Let’s talk to him for a moment and then we can discuss what’s next, okay? Can we take this one step at a time?” he asks.
“My father?” I ask. Guilt washes over me when I realize I tried to kill myself and would have made him grieve my loss all over again. I was so wrapped up in my sadness that I failed to remember that I’m not alone. I have my dad.
“Yes,” he says. “Can I look at your IV? It’s bleeding.”
I looked down and see that my arm is covered in blood, so I nodded and drop my head in shame. He comes over and he dons gloves and works to make my arm stop bleeding.
“I’m sorry,” I whisper. “I…”
“I know this is scary,” he says.
I look up and see Dad rush into the room. When he gets to me, he wraps me in a hug, and I start crying. “They’re gone,” I whimper. “I lost them. It’s all my fault.”
“Rhea, what are you talking about?” Dad asks, pulling back to wipe away my tears.
“Theo. Quinn. Jace. They died. He shot them,” I whimper.
“Baby,” he says softly. “They’re fine.”
“What? I saw them. I saw their bodies…” I start to explain.
“No, baby. No, you didn’t,” he says. “Marvin hit you with the butt of his gun and it knocked you out. You were in and out of it for a little while, but they gave you a mild sedative so that you would sleep through the night.”
“But I… I saw Theo get shot. He was right in front of me,” I say, confused.
“It was a dream, sweetie,” he says. “You screamed for Quinn before getting hit. Everyone came around the corner and Marvin shot himself when he realized you were not alone. He is dead and everyone is fine. Annoying, but fine.”
“Oh my God,” I say as I start sobbing. It felt so fucking real. Emotion racks from my body as Dad takes me into his arms. He gently rubs my back and reminds me that I survived. Everyone survived.
“How about you go get the others and Rhea and I can talk,” the doctor says to Dad when he pulls back.
“Yeah. They will be happy to see you awake,” Dad says. He gently kisses my forehead before standing. “I love you, baby girl. I’m so glad you’re okay.”
“I love you too, Dad. Me too,” I say softly.
When he leaves the room and the nurses are done picking up what I destroyed, the doctor sits with me. “How are you feeling?” he asks.
“My head hurts,” I say.
“You have a concussion, but no fractures and no bleeding on your brain,” he says. “We gave you something to sleep because your blood pressure was a bit high, but we have no real need to keep you too much longer.”
“Can I… can someone take this catheter out and let me get dressed before they come back?” I ask.
“I brought some scrubs,” the nurse at the door says. “Let me help you really quick before you two discuss things.”
“Okay,” I say.