Page 42 of Serious Cowboy

Thinking about that discussion in the present as Tim snorted at something his son said made Zeke contemplative. He’d never set out to hurt Callie—he’d never planned to have a relationship with her or anyone else in the first place—but he’d unintentionally done it regardless.

It reminded him that he could no longer live in such a narrow slice of his life. He’d been so focused on staying busy with one thing or another that he’d never actually dealt with his past. Not with his mom and dad’s nonsense. Not with his lack of social acumen. Not with Maria or Hadley. He’d refused to deal with any of it, and that blind spot had nearly cost him Callie.

Now, he couldn’t imagine his life without her.

And since their fences had all been mended and their time together going so well, he decided she should know what he was thinking and feeling. So as he smiled at her, raising his cold drink to where she stood across the yard from him, he formulated how he could make that happen.

As Zeke rana quality control check on the grains going into the herd’s upgraded feed that following Monday, he paused for long enough to marvel at how much his change in perspective made him look at his life differently. Before the accident, any reflectionhe might’ve made had been tainted by his jaded pessimism. He expected things to not work out, for things to blow up in his face, and for his life to end up in the toilet.

And often, as a result, it did.

It was shocking to see how much better everything became when he started feeling like his life could work out. Instead of feeling as if a dark cloud had been raining on him continually as if out to get him, he suddenly realized that he had a lot to be thankful for.

Surviving the crash for one thing. And that hadn’t been all he’d survived. But he no longer had to see his day-to-day existence be exclusively about mere survival anymore. He was actually thriving more often than not. He enjoyed his job, and he was good at it. He had a nice roof over his head that he could afford. He had food and clothing and could make himself comfortable at home.

He'd healed enough that he had his health. And that mattered a lot more than he’d ever previously comprehended it did.

He even had compassionate bosses who’d allowed him to initially work on small repair projects he could do while seated before he was up to anything more. With his body having healed for the most part, he’d learned to appreciate the small things. It made his overall disposition much less stormy.

He felt his phone buzz in his pocket, and upon glancing down, he spied that it was Callie texting him. They did this daily even though they also tended to share their dinners at either her place or his.

Callie: How do you feel about breakfast for dinner? I have a hankering for cinnamon roll pancakes.

Well, that was more than he’d expected to unpack this late in the afternoon.

Zeke: Hankering, huh? Have you been in Montana too long? I don’t remember you using language like that when you first arrived. I don’t think that’s typical for Pacific Northwest lingo.

Callie: You hush up.

He snorted, making one of the newest hires, a middle-aged guy named Cody who’d been traipsing behind him to cast Zeke a weird look. Zeke supposed he couldn’t blame the man. Cody might not know this, but for so long, Zeke was pretty sure he’d been known as either the most solemn employee or maybe even the crankiest. Mostly because he chose to be such a loner. But his cranky solemn days were over thanks to Callie.

And for some reason, he didn’t find keeping to himself as attractive as it used to be, either.

Zeke: As for dinner, you know I’m not picky. Cinnamon roll pancakes is an oddball choice, but I can go along with it.

He hit send and waited for her to jump on him since he’d been teasing her again. That was normal for them now, though. This goofy picking on one another for fun. He’d never thought of himself as a fun guy, but Callie had changed that.

When it came right down to it, she was a miracle worker.

Maybe that’s why he asked what he asked next. He didn’t even give her the time to respond.

Zeke: You still interested in a tour of the ranch?

The three little dotes denoting that she was about to respond popped up on his screen to vanish, then reappear, then vanish all over again. He watched as she seemed to be mulling this over wishing he could see the expression on her face. What was she thinking right now? This had been a little bit of a taboo subject between them before, but he didn’t think of anything as off-limits between them anymore.

Not that he’d jump into just any painful subject with a big grin, but he’d discovered that he and Callie could discuss anything as long as he was up front with how he felt about it. Callie’s own emotions were an open book.

Finally, she answered his question with a question of her own.

Callie: Are you offering me a tour of the ranch? I thought that wouldn’t be approved.

Zeke: Turns out they’re fine with it as long as I’m willing to take responsibility for you. Keep you out of harm’s way. You mind me acting as your shepherd as I guide you around?

Callie: Sure. When?

Zeke: We could do it as soon as tonight if you’re willing to delay your pancakes. Or any other evening once I’m off work.

The summertime meant plenty of daylight past five pm. So, it shouldn’t be hard to accommodate her.