Page 27 of Beautiful Noise
“A few days after I left the studio, I caught a flight to Africa. I was there for two months and then I was in Barbados, Honduras, Italy. I traveled for an entire year. I wasn’t sure what the fuck I was doing or if I wanted to do music anymore. Mypops bought me my first guitar, taught me how to play it.” I motioned to the one hanging on my wall. I hadn’t touched it since he passed.
“We sang together when I was a kid and he sent my first demo to the label. And it wasn’t a real demo. Just recordings of me performing. Something he filmed on his phone. They called him right away. We had one meeting and before it was over, I was signed for three albums. Three fucking albums at fifteen years old. My pops negotiated terms that were unheard of. I own the masters for everything I’ve ever done and even back then there was a clause in every contract that stated if and when I wanted to, I could walk. No questions asked. He never wanted me to feel pressure with the one thing I loved the most. He made sure that I was always free to make my own decisions. ‘Your soul is music, Ezren. Your soul should always be free to drift and land wherever it decides. Never let anyone own your soul, son. You can share it with them but never give anyone ownership’.”
“Wow.”
I chuckled. “Yeah, wow. That was my pops though. He was deep as fuck and so damn smart. The crazy part is the only formal education he had was high school. He did a few years in college but didn’t finish and that was mostly bullshit courses that couldn’t hold his attention. He dropped out to pursue music and then had to support me and my mom when he found out she was pregnant.”
“And he negotiated those terms with your label?” She frowned.
“Damn sure did.” I grinned at the memory. I had no clue what he’d done for me back then but I understood now.
“And they agreed, just said yes?”
“Hell yeah they did. I’m talented as fuck, Ri. They saw it back then and had dollar signs in their eyes. They couldn’t hide the greed and my pops used it against them. It was either his way orwe walked. They agreed. And yeah, I made them a lot of money but what they made, I made, and now it’s all me. Nobody is attached to what I do, which is unheard of.”
“Damn sure is.” I chuckled and she grinned. “So you almost gave up?”
“Yeah.” I shrugged. “My mom was suffering too and it was worse because she not only lost my pops, she lost me. I left and didn’t look back. I think it was why she gave Clay permission to release the album. She knew, or at least hoped, it would bring me home.”
“So that’s why he handled everything?”
“From start to finish. He took what I recorded, cleaned it up, did his thing with it, and sent it to me. I held onto the album for weeks before I had the courage to listen to the finished product.”
“And…”
“And I cried like a baby for days, then got my ass on a plane and went home. I felt like I was dishonoring everything my pops wanted for me by running.Hiding. That hurt more than anything.”
“But you named ‘Hollow’?”
I nodded. When Clay sent it to me “Hollow” was the only track left untitled. He never said why but we both knew it was because that track was the one. The one that gave me the closure I needed to get back tome. It was a love letter of sorts to my pops, but one that allowed me to express how hurt, angry, and broken I felt because he was gone but also how much I loved that man for everything I was blessed with because of him. He gave me the nickname Eccentric. He always told me I wasn’ttypicaland that the name Ezren wouldn’t sell records. My pops was the reason for all this.
“Stoned Heartwas the only thing you’ve created that wasn’t inspired by a woman or sex, then.”
I smirked and glanced toward the booth before admitting something I was going to regret.
“Not exactly. There’s a few more that were not inspired by sex, but definitely inspired by a woman.”
She frowned and her eyes followed mine to the booth. “What you heard tonight, while you were in here creeping and invading my privacy, was inspired by a woman, Ri.”
“Oh, I just assumed…”
I leaned in closer so our lips were almost touching. “Inspired byyou.”
“Me?” Her eyes expanded in surprise and I nodded.
“I was fucking pissed that you saw right through me. You recognized things no one else ever has and I didn’t like how exposed it made me feel, so I blew up instead of admitting the truth. Then I came down here and recorded some dope shit.”
Her eyes flashed with amusement and her smile was slow. Our mouths were still a breath away from connecting when she said, “Then I guess that means you owe me a personal thank you, for being your muse.”
I laughed, pressing my forehead to hers, gripping the back of her neck. I wanted her something terrible. The thought of Kori beneath me coming undone had my pulse thrumming erratically and my dick hardening to a very painful degree. I had felt this before, more times than I could count, but the odd realization was, when it was all over and I had my release, I would want to run like I typically did.
I was a bit selfish with women. I took what they offered but as soon as I had my fill, the release, the inspiration, I shut those same women out. But not this time, not with Kori. I didn’t sense the urge to take and run. And that was what had me asking a question I prayed she answered the right way. “I suppose I do. How would you like me to show my gratitude?”
CHAPTER NINE
Kori.
How?