Page 36 of Broken Pieces
Guess that's what a rich daddy gets you.
I suppose I do have my own now. Reginald is always more than willing to help out with money even though I hate accepting it. It'll never feel right, especially when he doesn't know what I was doing with his sons. He's the only reason I'm able to stay here as he pays my tuition. One day I'll pay him back. I refuse to follow in my mom's footsteps of using others to get what I want.
“Oh, okay, sorry. Look, Violet, I'm sure you don't want to, but you have my number if you ever need to talk about anything. I only ever see you hanging out with James. You're always welcome to hang withme instead.” Sarah frowns as she trails off, giving me an odd look like her feelings have been hurt, before she finds her bright smile again.
"Sure," I say, really not sure if I'll take her up on the offer. A few of her friends cast me dirty looks over their shoulders as she leaves with them. Even if she wants to be friends, I don't think I'll be allowed anywhere near that friendship circle.
The cafeteria is mostly empty as I step inside. My lecture was an extra session that the professor held for anyone needing to catch up and it finished later than I anticipated.
Unfortunately for me, I’m still not caught up and will have to spend the majority of my free time for the next few days in the library. I say that like I'm not always in there anyway.
Grabbing a tray, I take my time picking what to eat. There’s not much left at this time of day, but I manage to snag some macaroni that still looks fresh. Then I grab a soda and pay for it with my student card on the automated register.
Only two tables are currently occupied so I get my pick of seats for my meal. I head to one by the windows so I can watch the sunset and read my book in peace.
My appetite hasn’t been great recently and I end up picking at my food, pushing most of it around the plate. Leaving it, I sit back and let myself enjoy another chapter of the romance I picked up from the library yesterday.
By the time I’ve devoured three chapters more than I’d planned, it’s getting dark out. The pretty pinks and oranges of the sunset are long gone.
I can see more of my reflection in the window than I can anything else outside as it only gets darker.
I get that feeling again, like I’m being watched. Squinting my eyes, I lean closer to the glass to try and see outside.
“Can I join you?” I startle and look up to see James already sitting himself down across from me.
“Sure,” I say anyway, trying not to sound annoyed that he’s pushing his way in again.
For some reason, he’s the only thing from my past that has stayed with me.
My time with him at the house party is still blurry thanks to how much I drank. It’s like those details don't matter to my mind and it’s made sure to keep the end of the night crystal clear for me instead.
When I had my first day here, James ran into me. Well, according to him, he just happened to run into me, but I swear he was waiting for me outside my dorm building.
I feel bad for constantly trying to avoid him, but he’s just everywhere, always trying to talk to me and get me to hang out with him.
He’s a nice enough guy and if things were different I’m sure I’d end up liking him, but the thought of that makes my heart ache for all the wrong reasons. Every time I interact with him, it's a stark reminder of what I'm missing back home.
“You going anywhere after this? I know you like to hang out in the library a lot, I could keep you company.”
I’m not sure if that’s sweet or creepy that he seems to know my routine.
Is he the one that I felt watching me earlier?
“No, I'm heading straight to bed after this. It’s been a long day and I’ve still got a load of work to get done before semester ends.”
His shoulders slump from my rejection and I try not to feel bad, but if he just got the hint that I’m not interested, he wouldn’t have to feel put out.
“What about tomorrow? I could meet you for dinner if you like and help you get some work done?”
“James…sorry, I can’t.” I pick up my tray and start taking it back to the counter.
“Are you heading home this year? I know you didn’t for Christmas. If you need a ride, I finally have my own car. I kinda had to since, you know, my dad's locked up.” He looks awkward as he rubs at the dark stubble on his jaw. I'm sure his dad going to prison is something he's probably mentioned before, but I don't remember. He talks at me a lot.
I'm sure it's tough for him and maybe I should accept his offer of friendship or whatever it is he wants. Nothing like some good old trauma bonding to start a relationship off. Right now, that feels like the last thing I want. I can already picture the disgust on his face if he ever found out what I did with my stepbrothers.
As I turn to head back to grab my things, I realize he's still rambling on about his car. “It's actually pretty slick. I'm sure you'd love it, you seem like a girl that likes a fast ride. I can take you out and—”
“Seriously, can you just leave me alone?” I snap and his face falls.