Page 70 of The Keeper and I

“You left a fucking mess for me to clean up,” he said.

“I know.” She hung her head. “Ava told me what happened and—”

“You’ve spoken to Ava?”

“Yes,” she said with a swallow. “She and I have been speaking for a few months.”

His frown deepened. “She never told me.”

“She was afraid you’d shout at her.”

“I would have.”

The corners of her mouth quivered upward. “You’re a good brother to protect her so well. I’m glad she had you then. I’m glad she has you now.”

“She shouldn’t have to rely on me,” he shot back. “Then or now.”

“You’re right.” Her face fell. “I’m sorry.”

“Not that she needs me now, she’s off to fucking Australia,” he said, bitterness in his voice. His eyes snapped up to his mother, who was poised to speak, but he beat her to it. “And don’t say I can’t protect her forever. She’s my sister forever.”

Nina closed her mouth and sat back. “Aye, so she is.”

Uneasy silence fell between them. Jordan stewed about Ava keeping this from him, but he knew he would have to let it go. She had every right to begin a relationship with their mother again if she wanted it. It wasn’t as if he had consulted her about this meeting. He leaned forward, something else on his mind.

“Can I ask you something?” he said.

Nina nodded. “Anything.”

“What are you hoping to gain by reaching out to us now?”

She didn’t respond for a long moment, drumming her fingers along the side of her cup. She chewed her bottom lip, and he waited, an expectant look in his eyes.

“I made a terrible mistake, leaving you,” she said. “And I know I cannot undo it. But I’d like to start fresh with you both, form a new relationship, and be in your lives consistently. I see David with his children and grandchildren, and it makes me ache.”

Jordan bit back a scoff at the mention of David, the man she had cheated on his father with. They were married now. The gold ring on her left hand was evidence enough, but she had also sent him and Ava invitations to the reception since the wedding itself was at the courthouse. He only knew it was an invitation because Ava had opened it and told him. He had put the unopened parcel straight in the bin the moment he saw who it was from.

“To sum it up,” she went on, “I want my family back. I’m willing to do whatever it takes to get you both to trust me again. Even if it means I’ve got to get on my knees and beg.”

He rolled his eyes. “Don’t be dramatic.”

“I’m only emphasizing how much it means to me. You’re my child, Jordan. I love you.”

He couldn’t look at her once she said that. He hadn’t heard those words from either of his parents in over fifteen years. His chest felt like it was in a vise grip. He remembered Gene’s story about how it took effort from both parties to repair his relationship with Pam. Well, Nina was doing the work, holding up her end. All Jordan had to do was reach out and match her.

“Yeah,” he choked out, blinking away the sting in his eyes. “That’s why it hurt so much.”

“I know.” Her bottom lip trembled. “But if you let me, I’ll spend every day making it right.”

She held her hand out over the table, palm open and welcoming. Jordan took a deep breath and offered his own, wrapping his fingers around hers. He vividly recalled when he was a boy, and his mother would read to him. She had held his hand because he wanted to help her turn the pages, an image he quickly pushed down or he was certain he’d start blubbering, and his fifteen-year streak of not crying would be over.

“Alright,” he said. “We can…alright.”

“I know it’ll take time,” she said with a watery smile. “I’m just glad we can finally start.”

He nodded, then he took a large sip of coffee and shook away a sniffle, letting go of her hand. “You know Ava’s not giving you grandchildren, right?”

“Aye, she’s made that clear,” she chuckled. “What about you? I know you’ve only been with Laci a few months, but—”