Page 52 of Bedlam
“I just want her blood.”
“Let's dissect her brain. I bet it's filled with cotton candy and skittles.”
“Shut the fuck up!” I shout and everyone in the room looks at me.
“Mr. Callaghan and Miss Gaggiono, let’s go to my office. The rest of you are free to go.” Dr. Petrova orders and I huff.This man grates on my damn nerves.Everyone files out and we follow the dick a few doors down to his office. He rounds his desk as we all sit in the leather seats.
“I think today will be a non group therapy session. Gives us more privacy.” He says, but its the way he says it, and I don’t fucking like it.
“You don’t like anything. Lame ass.”
“For real, always a sad Little Boy Blue.”
“I’m bored. Can we just kill him already?”
Shaking my head, I clear my throat, but before I can speak he continues.
“I gather the voices are very loud for you today, Mr. Callaghan?” He asks and I nod, grinding my teeth together every time he calls me mister Callaghan.
“What triggered them today?” he asks and I roll my eyes.
“They don’t need to be triggered. They are always loud.” I spit and Lolli giggles, noticing that I’m losing my patience and fast.
“I see, maybe we need to increase your nightly dosage so you have a more heightened experience.” He suggests and I laugh.
“The meds don’t do shit other than give me a hard cock. Ya know, the getting blind folded and raped nightly is getting boring. They don’t do it for me anymore. My tastes are not what they provide, so I’m a bit of a dissatisfied customer. Try harder next time, Doc.” I chide as he writes in his little fucking note pad. My eyes zone in on his pen. It’s one of those dip pens with a very sharp tip. You can hear it dragging against the paper with every swipe, I bite back a moan as my dick twitches in my pants just hearing the sound and picturing it slice through tender flesh. The Doc clears his throat to get my attention as I was hyper fixated on the tool in his hand.
“I’m unsure of what you mean. Are you still hallucinating at night?” he asks and I want to fucking scream.
“So, what you're saying is that I’m making this all up. That the drugs are making me hallucinate sexual fantasies of being blindfolded and raped every single night?” I say incredulously. The audacity of this man to call me a liar. All this drug does is make you feel good, want to get a nut off then go to sleep.Like what the fuck is even happening right now?
“He’s calling you delulu.”
“Just like the clown next to you.”
“He’s just telling the truth that you don’t want to hear.”
I growl, standing up as I grip the sides of my hair and pull at it. “I’m not fucking delusional. This place brings out my fucking crazy. It makes me crave things I shouldn’t while in here. I need out. Now!” I scream, causing Lolli to giggle.
“From where I’m sitting, you may need to spend a few days in the ‘Time-Out’ room. Just until we get your medication correct.” He suggests and I shake my head, feeling suffocated as everything starts to close in on me.I can’t do this in here. I can't. I need to kill. I’m stronger than this.
“Are you though?”
“You killed your brothers in cold blood. For what? What did they ever do to you? Besides love and protect you, and you fucking failed them.”
“And don’t forget your blood queen. You raped her before taking a knife and gutting her through the cunt you say you love so much. “
I shake my head as I pace the room. I can hear him talking to me over the voices, but I can’t make out what he’s saying, and I don’t fucking care.
“You let the monster win. Loser.”
“He sure did. Fucking failure.”
“No one will ever love you, wanna know why? Because you killed them all. How does it feel to be alone with us, knowing we are all you have.”
“Fuck you, I didn’t mean to do it! I told Spade to take the monster down. Same thing I told Jade. Jade, my Princess, fuckkk!” I yell, falling to my knees as I think of all the hurt I caused and how the voices are right.They are all I have in this place. No one will ever love me.
A small hand lifts my chin and I jump, not wanting her to touch me while I’m like this. She kneels down in front of me, tilting her head. “What can we do to make you feel better?” She whispers and I shake my head.