Page 46 of Never His Girl
“So, instead of telling me how you felt, you decided to destroy me instead? Kicking me out, posting that video of us?”
He’s shaking his head before I can even finish, and he’s pacing again. He looks tortured, like a man warring with two voices inside his head. One telling him to continue being who he’s always been. Another telling him he’s reached a fork in the road and must decide right here, right now, who he’ll be moving forward.
“What I said afterward—telling you to leave—that was me being an ass,” he growls, like he expects me to already know this. Like it’s an excuse.
“No argument there,” I snap back, feeling my face grow hotter. “And the video? Was that just you being an ass, too?”
“The video was… It was…”
“It was what, West?”
I’m raging now, on my feet and then standing in his face, blocking his path. He’s not allowed to avoid this. He’s not allowed to avoidme.
I see that, more than anything, he wants me to let this go, wants me to stop pushing, but there’s no chance of that happening.
“It was what, West?” I ask again, clearly sick of his bullshit.
He stares down on me with the candles’ glow looking like actual hellfire in his eyes. His jaw is tight and he’s madder than the devil, but I’m not letting him slip past me again. He’s all out of passes and I’m all out of patience.
“If you don’t want to talk, then we’re done here,” I assert, already heading toward the closet to get his shit and put him out, sooner rather than later. But as soon as I reach the double doors—
“It was Parker.”
Hearing that, it feels like every ounce of air has suddenly left the room, and when I turn, West takes a few steps back and drops down into the chair again. He can’t seem to look at me, but meanwhile, I can’t take my eyes off him. Not even when he lowers his face into his hands, likehisworld just ended with this admission.
“Shit.”
That word leaves his mouth in a whisper and, afterward, we’re both silent.
Chapter 16
BLUE
All I can think about is the conversation Jules and I just had a few nights ago. The one where she voiced the possibility of Parker being to blame. But this was a theory I thought to be ridiculous even whenshementioned it.
“You’re lying.”
West doesn’t speak right away. Instead, he just sits there, still holding his face while I continue.
“If Parker’s to blame, no way you wouldn’t have turned her in. I know for a fact Dr. Pryor’s trying to take you down for the shit you pulled. If that happens, you can kiss whatever plans you have goodbye. Which is why I know you would’ve already shifted the blame to Parker if you could.”
Thinking about it, I’m even willing to bet the fallout from this will be so bad that not even hisfathercould fix it for him.
“This is just another lie,” I accuse. “More of you being you.”
He doesn’t stand, but he may as well with how he commands the room the next instant. With one hard stare, a breath stills in my throat.
“Think what you want, but deep down you feel it,” he accuses right back, making it impossible to turn away. “I want you, in a way that has nothing to do with wanting tofuckyou.”
The words are harsh, nowhere near soft or sweet, making him sound more like his usual self. They’re steeped in frustration and anger. I’m breathless now, panting while trapped in his gaze.
“There’s nothing you can tell yourself that’ll convince you this isn’t real,” he continues in that same hard, unapologetic tone. “You feel it. In your bones. Which is why you know I carenothingabout ParkerfuckingHoliday,” he snaps.
“Then why protect her? Why not give her up already?” I hear my own voice wavering and there’s no way he doesn’t hear it, too.
“Because she knows things!” he practically growls. “Things that could ruin my life, someone else’s. And despite what you think, I’m not some selfish dick who can’t see past himself. Yes, I stand to lose a lot if Parker opens her damn trap, but it’s not just about me.”
I hate that I’m not immediately shutting down this conversation. Hate that I’m still willing to listen.