Page 70 of Nightcrawler

I stopped again, tapped my chin and then kept on writing.

Review/rating by Nightcrawler: 2 stars

I looked over at him. “I guess you were right. This book really is boring as hell.”

He grinned. “Did I tell you or did I tell you? Go ahead, tell me what it’s about.”

I nodded, typing instead.

Synopsis:

This book tells of a courtship taking place between two men, one, the son of a middle-class tenant farmer, and the other, one of the wealthiest men in England…an unhappily, married man. They meet at a country ball. Through their day-to-day interactions during the courtship process, and the visitation of many house parties which take place in the English countryside, they get to know each other. The wealthy man is aloof at first, but is powerfully attracted to the simple country lad, eventually convincing him to become his side piece.

I stopped typing and looked over at him. His hand was covering his mouth, and he was laughing behind it. I snorted at the expression on his face when he looked over. “What?”

“Side piece?” Miguel asked.

I nodded.

“Please tell me there’s a whole lot of hot, gay sex in this book.”

I grinned, shaking my head. “Zero sex and one kiss.”

“A real sexy barn burner then?”

“Well, no, I guess not. Anyway, the next bit is the review.”

“Hang on a second,” he said, holding up the book and reading the back cover. When he’d finished, he nodded. “Okay, that’s sooo boring,” he said. “No sex. One kiss. Is there nothing about this book that’s interesting?”

I shook my head. “That’s why I was having such a hard time thinking about how to write the review.”

“Give me your tablet. I have a great review in mind.”

“Oh, good!” I shoved the tablet at him. “You write it.” He started typing and I leaned over and read what he’d written. I was laughing when he handed the tablet back to me.

My Review:

This historical is about a couple of gay dudes going to other people’s houses.”

“Where’s the rest of it?” I asked, still chuckling.

“Is there any more to it?” He gestured for the tablet and typed before handing it back. I read it and burst out laughing.

“I would have enjoyed this book more if every character had been killed off.”

I slapped my knee, still laughing as he grinned at me. “That’s the worst review I’ve ever read.”

He nodded.

“You should work on your reviewing skills.” He seemed to think about my suggestion. “Anyway, I should post it. Mr. Boring is gonna be mad.”

He shook his head. “No. I wouldn’t want Nightcrawler to lose his reputation entirely.”

“My reputation for bloviation, maybe.”

He laughed.

“Fine, I won’t post it, even though it’s a masterpiece.”