Page 53 of Succeeding Love

No wonder he wasn’t at work yesterday. I thought it strange at the morning meeting, him not being there, but then Stevens mentioned Nick’s absence being because of his move.

I can't even describe how embarrassing it was to hear that announced so publicly in our place of work. Everyone knew we were living together, and some had even gossiped behind my back about being the reason for his divorce. The office talk was excruciating the entire rest of the day.

I had to cover a meeting for Nick too, with one of his friends at City Hall. Nick was ignoring my calls, so I thought that if I flirted with his friend a bit, he might mention it to Nick and incite a call back. It didn’t though. I felt like a fool afterward, the man not showing any attraction to me whatsoever. Even some random man looking more fit to be in the police station than the city manager’s office wasn’t affected by me at all.

Is the reason that Nick lost interest in me because I no longer hold any attraction to others? I’ve gone to extremelengths to keep my appearance as it is, spending hours each week with a trainer at the gym, getting massages and treatments, and visiting the salon at least once a week. Has all that been in vain?

I got up and paced around my living room, chewing on my freshly manicured nails, even though my stylist just scolded me for them becoming so brittle and said they were about to break. When I couldn’t take the agonizing silence or my racing thoughts anymore, I picked my phone up to call him one more time.

It connected, but went to voicemail this time. I shrieked in anger, tossing my phone across the living room.

Everything feels like it is falling apart. Nick was, who knows where, refusing to talk to me, and I don’t feel like I could show my face at the office again. Not like this. Did he tell people we broke up? Are we broken up? Is that why the gossip was so bad?

Now, I’m just the home-wrecking whore of a lawyer that is after everyone’s man and ruining lives. I’m no friend to women, or at least that’s what I kept hearing in whispers and muttered conversations all day yesterday. Even my secretary was cold to me.

I don’t know how much more of this I can take. I didn’t seek a married man. He was the one that made it clear he was available to me. Yes, he was married. Yes, I knew. But I also wasn’t the one that tried to take him from his wife. He was already looking to leave.

Why do women get the brunt of the blame in society? I didn’t steal a married man or break his home. He broke that himself. I was just his tool. When a criminal hurts anotherperson with a hammer, you don’t put the hammer on trial. You put the one who used it.

What I hate most out of all of this is that I still want him. Even if I was being used, I enjoyed feeling needed. It made me feel like I was loved.

A tool can never be loved.

Baby Ducks

Feighlynn

“That went better than I thought it would,” Vin breathed into my ear.

Goosebumps rose on my neck, and the frustrating ache clenched inside of me. His breath smelled like mint. I bet mine smells like coffee and beef jerky. I resisted the urge to cover my mouth or kiss him. Two extremes that were not acceptable for the setting.

“Preston liked my shirt!” I laughed lightly, trying to aim my breath towards the ground.

“Of course he did,” Vin chuckled. I felt my face heat with his eyes staring at me in that swoon-worthy way.

I had to keep reminding myself there were other people around. Other people, including my ex husband.

Preston was talking to the younger coach, who didn’t look happy. Preston was still smiling, though, so whatever they were talking about couldn’t be that bad.

The head coach was blowing a whistle, walking around with a clipboard while snapping commands at a group of boys doing warm-up drills.

“No way,” Vin huffed, staring at the field.

“What?”

“I know him,” he pointed to the head coach. “He was the assistant coach for my football team in high school.”

“No way. What a small world!”

“Yeah, that’s crazy.”

“You played football?” Sherry’s husband asked. “What school?”

Vin started talking with the other dads about sports, Sherry’s husband, and a few of the others actually knowing who Vin was from high school days. Apparently, his team was really good back then.

His sudden camaraderie with the dads helped to decrease the tension dramatically. For everyone but Nick, who just stared at the field with a bored expression.

That changed when the game actually started. The game was a good one. All the parents, Nick included, got into it, cheering and yelling loudly with every play. Despite his faults, Nick was a good father. The pride on his face when Preston got his first home run was unmistakable.