Page 65 of The Dragon Queen
When Ethan arrived, he looked upon Talon’s body then gave a slight shake of his head. He didn’t grieve for his friend the way Khazmuda and I did. He held his silence and stepped away, looking out over the city with glazed eyes.
I wanted to run from reality, but I didn’t want to leave Talon’s side, protecting him in death even though someone unalivecouldn’t be hurt. I felt no desire for revenge because a person’s execution wouldn’t bring back the person he’d killed.
Khazmuda lay upon the stone with his chin on the ground, crying on and off, not saying a word to me or anyone else. Other dragons would come to console him, to rub their snouts against him, but he wouldn’t react to their touch.
His mind was elsewhere.
I sat there upon the stone, feeling more helpless than I ever had in my life. When I’d fled Scorpion Valley, I’d thought I was running toward something better. When I’d fled the Arid Sands, I’d thought life would get better on the other side. But now that I’d lost Talon…life would never get better.
The first real happiness I’d ever had was taken from me.
It was senseless and unexpected. He feared the battle would claim his life, but he survived a war and achieved all of his dreams…just to be killed by an unknown foe in the end. It decimated me. I sat upon the ground with my arms around my knees, unable to look at Talon’s dead body anymore.
My uncle came to me, taking a knee beside me as his hand went to my shoulder. “I’m so sorry, Calista.”
I didn’t look at him or acknowledge his words. I didn’t want condolences for an event I refused to believe had happened in the first place. I didn’t want pity because that would make it real. Khazmuda and I were equally eviscerated by this, but we neither spoke nor looked at each other.
My uncle sat with me for a long time and didn’t say anything else.
Eventually, Queen Eldinar approached, and my uncle silently excused himself.
I didn’t look at her. Kept my eyes on the ground. The flood of tears had caused a pounding headache in my temples, but that didn’t stop new tears from coming. Drops formed in the creases then slowly dripped down my face.
Queen Eldinar offered no words of solace. She didn’t place her hand on mine. She just sat there with me, feeling the pain with me.
I looked at Khazmuda, who continued to sniffle on and off, releasing quiet whines like a dog that didn’t know how else to express his grief.
She continued to sit there.
When the battle was over, I was excited for the future. Whether we lived here or in the north, I would be happy as long as I had Talon and Khazmuda. Whether he asked me to marry him now or in five years, it didn’t matter. I looked forward to the day we had children, when I could give him a child to fill that void in his heart.
But all of that had been taken from me—and it was fucking cruel. “I don’t know what happened.”
She remained quiet.
“I—I just don’t understand.”
She looked at Khazmuda, his tears like diamonds against his scales. “I’m sorry—for both of you.”
My lips trembled as new tears dripped down my cheeks.
“Neither of you deserves this. Talon doesn’t deserve it either.”
“I—I don’t know what to do.” He was my home, the place I belonged when we had no shelter. Whether we were in Shadow Stone or Riviana Star or in the middle of nowhere, he was my home. Without him, I had no purpose or motivation.
“You still have Khazmuda, Calista. Not that he could ever replace what you lost.”
Tears continued to drip to my lips.
“You always have a home with us in Riviana Star. You’re always one of us.”
I wiped away the tears with my palm.
“We would be honored to bury him in our cemetery. Beside honorable kings and queens. As the savior of our forest, he’s earned a place there. Unless you think he’d rather remain here with his ancestors.”
“If he stays here, I can’t visit him.” It was a selfish thought, but I couldn’t live on the other side of the world while his grave remained behind. The Southern Isles was a beautiful place, but without Talon, I felt no love for it.
“Then he’ll join us.”