Page 48 of When Night Falls

Just outside of the walk-in closet is a beautifully framed door that goes into the bathroom and as I walk in and take a look around, I can't help but feel my smile spread as my eyes widen with wonderment. The most beautiful pearl-colored claw-foot tub cozies up to a floor-to-ceiling window that overlooks the cliffs. It's one of the dreamiest bathrooms I've ever stepped foot in, with gold marbled tiles for flooring and matching countertops on the sink vanity. I can see where the midnight sky kisses the water of the ocean, waves shimmering in the light of the moon.

I take a deep breath as I take it all in.Thisis not what I was expecting when I was told that this would become my home. I honestly didn't know what to expect butthis. . . this is a lot to consume.

As I exit the bathroom back to the bedroom, I toss my only bag on the bed. Then I panic and frantically remove my luggage to set it nicely on the white plush, carpeted floor, realizing that I probably shouldn't treat this space like I would with the stuff at my apartment, seeing as everything in this room looks way more expensive. I know a single drape would cost more than what's left in my bank account. It doesn't take a genius to realize thateven that amount of money doesn't mean anything under the roof of this castle. That has to be chump-change here.

That thought causes me to draw concern over the bookstore and my lease on the apartment.

Why didn't I think about those things beforehand? I know I'm going to have to end the lease for the apartment which I don't think will be an issue but am I going to have to sell the bookstore?

Questions run through my head about what my old life is to become when my new life officially takes over.Whenwill my new life officially take over?

I hate that I’m left here alone as my questions pester me. Despite what either Rivian or I want out of this, the last thing he should do is make me feel like I’m doing this alone. I’m starting to feel hostility toward my husband-to-be for his lack of forethought in this situation. His neglect of my feelings seems cruel, then again, he is a vampire and what, if anything, is crueler than the creatures who stalk in the night.

But how can he think that leaving me here would benefit anyone? Does he not want me here? Because he worked really hard to get me to believe that this is my fate, my destiny. He seemed eager to get me here, like something in his world depended on it; something more than just a stupid soul bond and a craving for power.

But I have to calm myself down, anger is not something I want to express right now when I've already been so hot and cold with the man, and with myself honestly. But I also don't want to be some agreeable pawn that he can just use and then ignore in times like this when my mind is racing, and I just need someone to talk to.

Stella would have listened.The silly thought makes me giggle but also creates a sadness within me. Am I really that lonely that I think back to how a spider would let me talk out my problemsto her. I hate feeling like I have no one, and even my so-called soulmate is treating me as if I don't exist.

Before I know it, another hour goes by—I sat in the empty tub in the bathroom and stared out the window, watching the water dance in the moonlight as time went by—and I still haven’t heard from or even seen Rivian.

I start to pick at my fingernails—the chipped purple nail polish now litters the bottom of the tub—as worry weaves its way into my mind and I start to overthink everything once more. I find myself biting so hard on my lip in anticipation, that I start to taste blood.

I decide I have to take this situation into my own hands. I can't just sit around and wait to be rescued, so to speak. So I jump out of the bathtub and head for the door. I didn't have time to pay attention to details because he was walking so energetically, varied with anger, that I was worried I might lose him if I didn't attempt to keep up.

Why would he give me my own room? Why wouldn't I just share his room with him, seeing as I am to become his wife?I thought when we walked through the hallways earlier, remembering when I kissed him.

After finally deciding that I'm brave enough to leave my room, I open the door carefully, hoping that Kacian isn't standing guard. When I peek into the hallway and see the coast is clear, I silently tiptoe out and close the door as quietly as I can behind me. I peer down the hall to make sure no one is around. I don't want to get caught trying to sneak out in case I wasn't supposed to leave my room. But also, it's late and I don't want to wake anyone. But if that's the case, then he should have said something to me . . .anything. But no. He just walked me straight to my fancy new room and closed the door on me as if I were some kind of child that had just been grounded formisbehaving. Not to mention, curfew just ended, whatever that means.

I start to really let it bother me that he acted that way. This whole time he's been feeding me tricks with his eerily distorted whispers and convincing me that my life is practically only relevant to better his.

I start to feel the thread of panic unravel at the thought that I did something to cause him to be so frustrated with me. But I've been doing what he's asked of me. I listened to his crazy offer and took in everything he said. Even now, I waited for him to come around while I wasted my night in a fucking bathtub.

Why is he allowed to get upset with me and toss me away like a crumpled-up piece of paper? And for no reason at that.

So, you know what?No. I refuse to let myself feel like I did something to deserve his anger. I've spent my whole life trying to figure out what I did wrong to deserve hatred from so many people and I refuse to start this new chapter of my life doing the same damn thing.

I trudge angrily down the stairs, not really caring anymore if I wake whoever else is sleeping in this stupidly large castle. I don't know where I'm going but I know that I need to find Rivian somehow, someway.

I feel like my emotions have been chaotically scattered more than I'm used to and it's serving resentment in myself and with Rivian. I've shown vulnerability to this man more than I have to anyone else on the planet and I fear that might have given him reason to think I am easy to manipulate or that I'll bend to his control. I want him to know that me marrying him ismydecision, and that I won't be thrown around like some doll. We can either do this together and come to a mutual understanding on some things or we can battle this out the hard way, which probably won't do either of us much good. Either way, he willfucking respect me. But he also needs to know that he can't just treat me like gum on the bottom of his shoe.

I cringe as I think about the time when I sat in gum at school, and everyone laughed at me. Every single person in that cafeteria that saw what had happened laughed at me. Not one person opted to help or do anything to lessen the blow.

Fuck all of them.

Every person who has ever fucking laughed at me or left me alone with my intrusive thoughts, not caring to ease the pain or to help settle the negative in my mind can go to fucking hell.

I round the corner to the hallway that leads back out to the foyer, pissed as I try to decide where to go to look for the asshole who brought me here. I look down the expanse of the rest of the house and I can't even see the end of it, that's how I know it's big. I don't see signs of anyone else walking the halls like I am, and it creates an eerie feeling to blanket the darkness around me. But my curiosity draws me to the large room east of me.

I wonder over, a little more calmly now than I was when I was stomping down the steps, and I walk in to see that it resembles an oversized dining room. There's a large table in the center that looks like it could fit about two dozen people at one time. When I glance at the rest of the room, I see that nothing else takes up the space. The details are just as exquisite in this room as they are in my room, except it's darker in here. Power is born in this room, or at least that is what it feels like.

"See you've found the great hall." A familiar voice sneaks up from behind me and because of the echo the room provides her, it makes me jump a little.

I turn around to see a shadow of a girl standing in the doorway. There's no lighting, save for the small stream of moonlight provided by the one window, but as she walks closer, I start to recognize her from the other day.

"Troian?" My question creeps up my throat in a shocked tone. Deja vu sinks into the moment even though I know it's only because I've seen her once before.

"You can call me Troy," she says to me as she walks further into the room to meet me.