Page 64 of When Night Falls
"Next time you try to level up with me, make sure you can fucking take it Lucynda."
Shame washes over my face, hatred stews as I watch him wipe his fingers off on his stupid little silk napkin before turning to walk away.
"I can’t love you," he starts and I'm almost startled by the sudden change in his tone, dropping from his demanding growl to this calm and calculated timbre. "I can't give you the heartthat you wish for. You are here because it is your duty. Your destiny is to be my wife. I will give you everything I can, Lucynda. But I can not and will not give you love."
Fucking prick. Who treats women like that? Is that because I stopped him from going further the other day? Is this payback? Or punishment? I don't even think that what I had said to him just now was that bad, at least not to constitute this kind of cruel treatment.
"Wait!" I holler at him before he exits.
Forget the embarrassment I'm battling right now, forget the fact that he's a complete asshole for what he just did, I still want to make this work. And after experiencing the rapturous need of having him so close to me, I don't want to let him walk away. I can't let him walk away. If I have to accept his promise for what it is, I'll do that. But I can’t be stuck in this life feeling just as alone as I was before. That would kill me.
"Rivian, please. I didn't come over here to make you mad or fight with you or to do whatever the fuck that was."
He stops at the door.
"If you thought that was me mad, Cyn. Then you are in for a rude awakening."
I sigh at his words, knowing that I toyed with him enough to cause him to feel resentment toward me. Or maybe he was fighting his own battle, hiding the satisfaction I gave him and retaliating the only way he knows how?
"I only wanted to help. I want to play my part. Really play my part. But you've got to stop pushing me away." This is not me pretending. This is me actually allowing myself to be vulnerable with him. I'm obviously not doing something right and I have to pivot, try another angle.
But it's hard when the throes of my near-orgasm haunt me, needing that relief more than I need my next breath. Though I have to subdue the need a little longer.
"If you don't want to giveusa chance, fine. But don’t forget, you tracked me down and made it your mission to bring me here. We can’t keep going back and forth like this. It's not a good look to the kingdom, am I right? Whether you want me to be youranima vinculum, or whatever the hell you call it, or not, I am here and I am staying. So please."
I let myself be expressive in my sincerity, my need to have him give me this chance.
"I have a meeting to get to." His response is short and simple. But I don't let hope escape me as he didn't give me a clearno.
"After your meeting. Can we meet after your meeting?"
Rivian visibly seems trapped. Good. So am I. He's displaying the way I feel. Do we want this or do we not? To give in or not to give in?
Trust me, it's giving me whiplash just as I can see it wreak havoc on him. But as he sighs and turns his head to look at me, solace washes over me as his tone softens and his eyes meet mine.
"I'll come find you."
22
virtues & vendettas
Rivian
"You're late." I walk into the great hall feeling all out of sorts.
Fuck, I'm such a stupid man for letting myself give into the siren that inserted herself into my space.
After having my fingers on her that first time, I knew it to be detrimental to my plans if I ever did it again. But I can't fucking help it. I crave everything about Lucynda to the point where it has become second nature to want her.
And she took it so fucking well. I can tell I won't have to do much convincing come the blood bind, because not only did she let me drink from her willingly but her desire for me seems to run just as deep. My sweetest sin. Hell, this is going to fuck everything up.
"I had to take care of something," I say to Zharus as I walk toward where he stands at the head of the table.
"You took the wrong time to do so," he warns.
"What do you mean?" I roll up my sleeves, still feeling and smelling her on me. My heartrate attempts to pick up pace but I will it to calm the fuck down as I focus my attention to the current situation.
"There's been another-"