Page 90 of When Night Falls

It took me a cold shower and a few hours of no sleep thinking over the fact that I gave him a reason to question someone; I forced his hand and he willingly showed it to me.

Over the course of the last few days, I've been sure about two things: I want Rivian and I want to become queen. I've never been more dead set on a decision in my life. I want this and I want this with him.

"It's time to prepare for your day, Miss Claire." A sweet voice cracks from behind the door as a soft knock raps against the wood. It's Natasha.

I yawn as I sit up in bed, still feeling the glow of my night last night, relishing in the way he made me feel even after he left me.

Claimed.

Natasha and I spend the rest of the day getting ready for my wedding. Breakfast was catered to me an hour after another shower and then my nails were painted for me.

I will say it is rather strange to have things done for me like this, seeing as I’ve done everything for myself since I was five. But as a servant gets down on her knees to paint my toenails, I can't deny that it makes me feel special and pretty to be pampered because I know it’s all for Rivian.

Once the tedious tasks were done, I was reminded to take my second birth control pill and then Natasha helped with my hair, which we decided looked better down and slightly graced with loose curls. We kept the makeup light with simple mascara and a little bit of eyeshadow. Then she applied lipstick over my lips, a dark blood red that looked almost black amongst the shadows. I wanted something to match his suit.

Before I knew it, it was time to put on the dress.

I let Natasha pull the material up my body as I stepped into it and fixed my arms into the mesh sleeves. They only go about halfway up my arm, and despite the shivers I get from the cold air, I love the way it leaves my upper shoulders, clavicle, and neck open to view.

Natasha tightens the corset as she weaves the strings in their rightful places and pulls, cinching me in, lifting my breasts, and tying the strings in their final place.

I look in the mirror, the final look reflecting back at me.

"You look beautiful, Miss Claire," Natasha compliments me. We share a smile and I thank her for all that she’s done.

She makes sure I have everything I need before walking away and seeing herself out. "Troian will be up shortly to gather you. Congratulations, Miss Claire." I give her a courteous nod of appreciation before she closes me in my room by myself.

I stare at the girl in the mirror feeling mixed emotions about what’s to happen within the next hour.

On one hand, I feel beautiful and I feel excited to start this new chapter of life. I’m open to endless hope, knowing anything is better than the life I suffered through before. It has to be.

On the other hand though, I feel conflicted. I know I will have no one in the chairs waiting for me as I walk the aisle. I have no family or friends. I'll be walking down by myself and though I am about to become a queen, the idea that loneliness will greet me still settles deep into my soul.

I twist the placeholder diamond on my finger trying to quell my unease. Everything will be okay.

"Holy shit." A familiar voice breaks me out of my trance, and I look in the mirror to see Troian approaching me from behind.

I smile, because that's exactly how I pictured her to greet me in this moment.

"Are you sure you want to go through with this, Lucynda? I mean you look beautiful and I am a big fan, but I still don't knowhow Rivian is going to react." She leans against the wall, her black hair tied up in a fancy, loose-curled bun and her peach-colored dress creates curves on her that I had no idea she was hiding. Tattoos cover her left arm, again, something she was hiding under all her clothes, and her blue eyes glisten against the only color I've seen her wear.

I turn to look at my future sister-in-law.

"He's going to worship me in this dress," I say with a devious smirk on my lips. Maybe I'm feigning a little too much confidence. Maybe he'll get mad and rip me a new one, what's new? But as I swipe my hands downward against my dress, I can't help but feel sexy on my wedding day so I can only hope my husband will think so too and if I have nothing else, at least I’ll have that.

"You'll do fine," she tells me and I love the way she attempts to comfort me, likely sensing the gaslighting technique I try to pullover on myself.

I think of the ways my fiancé has made me feel like the most special woman in the world. The way Rivian let me make the decision to walk to the venue last night, how he didn't even bat an eye when I asked him for something I wanted. The fact that he’s killed for me, the way he worshiped me on the throne in that room, and the way he silently promises to make sure I know that with him, I am safe.

I feel the remnants of what feels like falling in love berate me, making my thoughts of hope twist into a severe form of chaotic need.

Needing to shake the ridiculous feelings, I turn to Troy to change the subject.

"What about you? Have you seenheryet?" My question causes Troy to deflate a little. She turns to look at me.

"Not yet. She wouldn't even see me when Trav took us to give her the invite."

I remember her telling me last night on our way back home about how Trav had found their mother. It was a shock considering I'd assumed just like everyone else that she had been dead. But no. She was alive this whole time and Travois had been hiding her away. Confirmation that he is, in fact, a dick.