Page 290 of The Grand Duel
I sober my features, looking down at her as she peers around at her guests.
“Although I’m pretty sure he could be gone for twenty years, and I’d still feel this way. Like he’s going to walk in the tent at any second and tell me he’s sorry for being so late.” She gives me a wistful smile. “I’ll wake up in the night sometimes, thinking I can hear the engine of his bike crackling through the trees as he rides up the lane.”
I can’t imagine feeling how I do about Lissie tonight for years and years to come. “I’m sorry it’s still so hard, Scarlet.”
She shakes her head, brushing it off. “It’s got better in other ways. I’m doing okay.”
“Lissie’s been going to see him,” I tell her. “Lance, I mean. He’s not accepted the visits. He doesn’t even know Lissie exists. She did it in my name so that he wouldn’t think I gave up on him when I stopped going.”
Her brows rise, her smile gentle as she processes what I’ve just said. “That’s…” She huffs a laugh, a tear slipping down her cheek.
I lean in, catching it with my shoulder. “Sorry.”
“No, don’t be sorry.” She rolls her lips, reining in her emotions. “That’s very sweet of her. She was nervous tonight. I know it feels like she’s ignoring you, but she’s as lost as you are. You hurt her when you left.”
“I know I did.”
“Do you not think you should go home to her now? You’re clearly both hurting more apart than you were together. It’s okay to admit you were wrong, Charlie.”
My heart thuds, aching, and I steel my jaw, annoyed that the alcohol I’ve drowned myself in isn’t numbing me in the way I’d like.
“You said she was nervous tonight.”
I look over at her, at the way she stands in Freddie’s hold as if she knows I’m watching her.
“That she’s scared,” I continue. “And you’re right, she is. But so am I.”
My eyes don’t leave her.
“If I go home, and she looks at me the way she did earlier tonight, I’ll hate myself for it. For what I’ve made that much worse.”
“Do you not think the longer you wait the worse it will get? Things can’t just be perfect at the click of a finger. You have to sit through this with her and make things okay again.”
“I know that. I just…”
“If Lance walked in through the tent right now, after all he’s put me through by shutting us out, I’d be in his arms before his eyes could even find me. I get it’s not that simple, and I know everything with Emily scares you, but neither one of you deserves to feel the way that you do.” Scarlet steps back as the song ends, her smile sad. “You have to put it right now, Charles.Beforethe baby comes. You can’t wait.” She lets go of my hand. “I’m going to go see if that Freddie wants a pint.”
She cocks her head towards him and Lissie.
I reach out and pull her back towards me, wrapping my arms around my friend as she chuckles.
“You’re so drunk.”
I close my eyes when she hugs me back. “He’ll be thinking of you. He’ll know the date, and he’ll be thinking of you tonight. We’re all so proud of you, Scar.”
When I pull back, her eyes are sparkling. “Go away before you make me sob in front of everyone. Those stupid reporters outside would have a field day with that in the morning.”
There’s a commotion at Scarlet’s back, gasps and shrieks ringing out as bodies fall to the dance floor with a thud.
I pull Scarlet back from the chaos as the grown men brawl in the middle of the dance floor and then immediately scan the room, searching the crowd to find Lissie and the children.
They’re nowhere in sight.
Security is everywhere, guests too, making it impossible to find focus on one thing.
I see Megan dragging Miles Dukes up by the bicep, his nose clearly broken as blood pours down his face. He finds his feet and smiles across the crowd, taunting, right before Mason steps in front of him and pushes him back a step, pointing towards to exit of the tent.
As the fight is broken up, I walk around the dance floor, looking for Lissie as hordes of people file out of the tent. The other half grow silent, guests of Scarlet’s who are now watching on in shock at the disarray.