Page 19 of The Quirky Vet

"Oh, Gramps, I'm so sorry."

"Don't be sorry. You're getting this house."

"But you just said Mum will fight you."

"She can fight me all she wants, that doesn't mean she's going to win."

"I don't understand."

"As you know, I'm good friends with Polly." That's Wilby's grandmother. "She put me onto a friend's granddaughter who's a solicitor. We strengthened the will. Your mother can still contest it. I can't stop her from doing that, but it'll be much harder for her to win."

"What exactly did you do?"

"We put in what's called a conditional bequest. It basically means I can leave my house to whoever the hell I want, but there's a condition attached."

"A condition?"

"Yeah."

He scratches the back of his neck, suddenly looking sheepish.

The hairs on the back of my neck stand up. "Gramps, what have you done?"

"Well, you see, the house and all my assets will go to you if you're…"

"Come on. Spit it out, old man."

"Married."

"What?" A bit of scone comes up my throat, and I cough. "Why would you do that?"

He claps my back a few times. "I told you, to strengthen the will."

"And when were you planning on telling me this?"

"At your and Maisey's wedding."

"Oh.Ohhh." Our eyes meet, and now his jubilant reaction to finding out I was married, albeit to a different person, makes sense. "Wait. This means— What does this mean exactly?"

"You been vapin', mate? You're dumb as dog balls tonight. This is perfect. You're married, and your mother won't get her grubby mitts on this house."

"Um, there's just one problem."

"What's that?"

"You're still alive."

"Not for much longer."

I glare at the smiling old fucker. "It's not funny when you say it."

"I disagree. But the point is, by staying married to Fitz, you're guaranteeing you get your inheritance."

"But you still have years left in the tank. I can't stay married to Fitz for that long. He's looking into how we can divorce or annul this marriage."

"Can I offer some unsolicited advice?"

"Absolutely not, but go ahead because I know you will anyway," I say, flopping back onto the couch and stuffing another scone into my mouth.