Page 33 of The Quirky Vet

We've been physically close many times—with hugs, backslaps, that one time I had to smear body glitter all over his back for a video—but this is the first time that we're being intimate.

Fitz slides his tongue gently along my lower lip, like he's testing the waters. My heart's racing, every part of me alive and electric. The soft scratch of his beard adds texture to the kiss, a strange mix of warmth and roughness that somehow makes this feel more intense, more grounded. As the bristles brush my skin, there's a surprising comfort in the unfamiliar sensation.

Fitz slides his tongue tentatively against mine as his fingers brush up the side of my face and into my hair. Fireworks are going off inside me, but the euphoric rush of what we're doing is balanced by this inordinate sense of calm. Of…of rightness.

My eyes flutter shut as the kiss deepens, the burn of tension that's been simmering between us finding release. We find a good rhythm, our mouths moving in sync. My senses kick into overdrive, flooded by the feel of him. So close. So real.

But then a tiny doubt breaks into my head, niggling at the back of my mind. Is this a mistake? Is he going to regret it? Will this ruin our friendship?

I do my best to ignore the questions I'm too afraid to face, determined to enjoy this moment while it lasts.

The kiss ends, and he pulls away. His eyes search mine with a mix of uncertainty and something else I can't quite read. My heart is still racing, and the air between us feels thick, charged.

"So," he rasps, then clears his throat. "Did it work?"

I frown. "Work?"

"Yeah." His eyes drop to my lips then move back up to meet my gaze. "Did that give you any more insight into your, uh, feelings for me?"

6

Fitz

I stare at my best friend, my best friend who I can still taste on my lips, and wait.

Why did I kiss him like that?

To shut him up? To cut through the awkwardness that's been lingering for the last two weeks? To help him figure out his feelings?

All of the above?

Or maybe another option?

A simpler option.

One like…I wanted to kiss him.

Plain and simple.

Not sure I fully understand where that's coming from, but after the bucks' party a few days ago—specifically the moment we were having until we got interrupted—I've been doing some thinking.

After close to twenty years of friendship, you fall into patterns and grooves. With Muir and me, I'm the open book who shares his feelings easily, while Muir takes his time and processes everything before eventually opening up.

But before Linus and Ryde showed up, that familiar rhythm of our friendship was turned upside down. Muir was the one opening up about his feelings, while I found myself retreating into my thoughts, scrutinising every small aspect of our friendship.

And then…we were about to kiss. I'm not misremembering that, am I? Because it sure as hell felt like it.

Ever since, I've been thinking.

About how well we get on.

About how easy things are between us.

About how I always feel that little bit more alive whenever he's in the room.

About how I've subconsciously been trying totransplant all the good things about our friendship into my relationships, but it's never quite worked.

Why would I do that unlessImaybe have some deeper feelings for him? And if Sid reckons kissing a bloke is a good barometer for figuring shit out—why not figure some shit out?