Page 36 of The Quirky Vet

"Well, that's because she created it during the pandemic, and it's full of fictional characters."

"You don't say."

"Cool, huh?"

"Very cool."

He launches into alooongspiel about some girl called Betty who gets her heart broken when her boyfriend, James, cheats on her, but he's caught in a love triangle with Betty and Augustine. I start tuning out when he talks about some real-life socialite whose wild and scandalous life inspired "The Last Great American Dynasty."

I may not be enthralled by the topic of the conversation, but at least he's talking about something.

And he's enjoying himself.

He's gripping the steering wheel with one hand, his sun-kissed blond hair catching the light from the window, the messy strands falling just over his sharp blue eyes that seem even brighter in this glow.

He's relaxed, a faint smile playing on his lips, but he looks different somehow as he bobs his head as "Cardigan" hums through the speakers.

Or maybe it's me?

I'm the problem. It's me.

Maybe I'm seeing him differently this morning because of what happened yesterday.

His black T-shirt stretches across his chest and shoulders, outlining every defined muscle as he grips the wheel. His arms are thick and strong, biceps pressing against the fabric, while his worn jeans fit snugly around his powerful legs. Yet here he is, humming along to Taylor Swift, completely at ease, the mix of strength and softness just part of who he is.

It's one of the things I love most about him. He's rugged and masculine, but it never comes at the cost of his sensitivity.

That's one of the reasons why I've let him in, I mean really let him in, and told him stuff I haven't been able to share withanyone else about the single most painful, most defining moment of my life—losing Lleyton.

I try not to think about it too often, but something about the open road and the atmospheric music takes me there.

Back to that day when I was ten.

I wasn't there when Lleyton drowned in the dam, but twin telepathy is a thing, because all day while I was out with Mum and my sister, Schapelle, I felt off. Like something was wrong, but I wasn't sick, and I couldn't pinpoint what it was, so I just sat with it.

And then we got home, greeted by an ambulance out the front of the house.

I instantly knew that it was Lleyton. That he was gone.

Lleyton was the kind of kid who never seemed to sit still, always running, laughing, and filling every room with his energy. His boundless enthusiasm was contagious—whether he was organising games or cracking jokes, people couldn't help but be drawn to him. Everyone loved him, from neighbours to teachers, because he had a way of making life brighter just by being around. Full of life and spirit, he had a spark that made the world feel more alive whenever he was near.

It was the first real devastation I'd ever gone through in my life, and it hit my whole family hard. My folks, usually the happiest, most optimistic people you'll ever meet, were shattered. My other brother, Cliff, was racked with guilt and blamed himself, and Schapelle withdrew.

And I…I was broken. My other half had died, and I had no idea what to do with the pain and loss and all-consuming grief I was drowning in.

I looked at my family and decided to do the one thing that made sense—I started to become like Lleyton.

We may have looked alike, but until his accident, I was the quiet and shy one.

Not anymore. I hated seeing the people I loved sad, so I took on Lleyton's energy, and I became the one who made them laugh,who eased their worry, who entertained them with my crazy antics.

After a while, the old me was gone, and the new me felt so much better that I stuck with it. And now, I can't tell where Lleyton ends and I begin. Especially now that the world knows and loves me as The Quirky Vet.

But Muir knows.

He met me right at the cusp of my transformation, and he's the only person I've ever been able to be all of myself with—the Lleyton part, and the Fitz part.

"I was hoping to pick up some stuff from the farmers' market when we get back into town." Muir takes his eyes off the straight empty highway for a moment, and I sit up taller in my seat, pulling myself out of my massively heavy thoughts. "Is that okay, or do you want me to drop you off at home first?"