Page 51 of Deck the Skulls
After spending a sleepless night listening to Zan and Anatoly breathe, Rissa got up about five in the morning. As much as she enjoyed snuggling with the guys, even when her mind was going a million miles a minute, she needed to get up and move a little.
She’d gone over the same facts all night and never seemed to reach a solid conclusion. She loved Anatoly and Zan. They were not human. They loved her back. Their world was as dangerous, if not more dangerous, than the one she was used to.
Listing the pros and cons wasn’t working. The one question she had to answer was to decide if she was ready to be part of their world.
The beach was only a mile from the bar. She could walk there and give her body something to do while her mind whirled. She pulled on some clothes and piled her hair up in a messy bun.
When she finished tying her shoes, she straightened up to find Zan sitting up and watching her with a wounded expression that made her heart hurt.
“What are you doing?” he asked, voice barely above a whisper.
She walked over to him, trying for a reassuring smile. “I’m going for a walk. I’ll be back.”
When she was close enough, he wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her close, burying his face between her breasts. “Can I come with you?”
It was hard to get the words out because she knew they would make him unhappy. “I need a little time alone. I promise that I’ll come back no matter what.”
He didn’t answer right away, but his hold tightened, and he made a soft whimpering sound.
“Hey, don’t do that,” she said, urging him to move his head away from her with a slight pressure on his jaw. Pulling away, he looked up, and she was startled to see his eyes swimming with tears. As she watched, one of the tears slipped free, sliding down his cheek. She wiped it away with her thumb.
“This isn’t a goodbye,” she assured him.
He didn’t look reassured. “Take your phone,” he murmured, pulling completely away from her and slumping down in the bed. The absence of his warm body made her feel chilled.
Turning away, she scooped up one of Zan’s hoodies and pulled it on. The bulky item was a comfort, and the smell of Zan helped. She also grabbed one of Anatoly’s scarves. He had a whole collection that matched his outfits. Winding the soft length of fabric around her neck added his scent to Zan’s.
Tucking her phone in her pocket, she looked at the bed one more time. Zan was snuggled up against Anatoly’s perfectly still form. She could see the tension in Zan’s shoulders and even though Anatoly hadn’t moved, she could almost swear he was imploring her to stay.
Leaving the bedroom and then the apartment was one of the hardest things she’d ever done. Determined to give herself the space to think, she rushed down the stairs before her heart turned her around to join the men in bed.
She was surprised to find Sanguine wasn’t the same messy scene as it had been last night. All the broken furniture, glass, and rodent bones had been cleaned up. There’d been blood on the floors and walls from Zan and the other shifters getting wounded, but all of that was gone as well. The windows were boarded up and a new, plain door was installed.
It was impressive to realize the wolves had done all that last night and seemed happy to help, even though the woman at the center of the fight wasn’t even a shifter.
The front door was unlocked, but she guessed there had to be some kind of magic keeping people out. Probably the same magic that prevented anyone from noticing the raging battle last night.
Stepping out into the crisp morning, she looked around at the quiet neighborhood. There were a few trucks with food and drink logos trundling down the streets, and even fewer pedestrians. It was early, things wouldn't start picking up for another hour.
Tucking her hands in the hoodie pockets, she headed for the beach. The calm, crisp early morning did nothing to help alleviate the guilt she felt for leaving Zan and Anatoly. She knew it wasn’t logical. She wasn’t abandoning them. All she’d wanted to do was go for a little walk on her own, so why did she feel so bad about it?
Frustration made her walk a little faster. This was so dumb! She needed to focus on her relationship, not on why she felt so guilty for wanting space.
She was only a block down when she almost walked right into someone. Strong hands grabbed her arms to keep her from plowing into the stranger.
“Oh, shit, sorry!” she exclaimed.
“No harm done,” the man assured her, letting go of her arms and stepping away. “But it might be a good idea to pay a littlemore attention to your surroundings. I called out, but you didn’t even look up. If you kept walking, you would’ve hit that planter.” He pointed behind him where a heavy concrete planter acted as a bulwark to keep cars from jumping the curb.
That’s when she realized she was right in front of The Pack House. Savery smells wafted from the open door, and she could hear friendly chatter. Suddenly, a cup of coffee sounded good.
“Is your cat meeting you here?” the man asked. “I’m surprised he let you go anywhere alone.”
Her jaw dropped. “Excuse me?”
The man blinked, obviously puzzled. “You smell of mountain lion shifter and vampire. I can tell they’re your mates. It’s obvious why the vampire isn’t out here with you, but what about the shifter? On the rare occasion we shifters mate with humans, we tend to stick close. You guys are so vulnerable, it can make a shifter nervous.”
Great, now she felt even more guilty!