Page 98 of A Wish for Us

But before he could say any more, I sent my fist flying across his face. His head snapped back. When he turned around, his lip was busted. “You’re nothing,” I spat. “You’re nothing compared to him.” I rushed out of his garden before he could say anything else. I ran and ran until I found myself back at the lake. But the minute I was back there, all I saw was Bonnie, and whatever was left of my heart shredded into fragments.

I sank down to the dock and hung my feet off the end. My head dropped, and I let everything come out. I couldn’t hold it together.

Bonnie.

My dad.

Lewis…

Tipping my head back, I stared at the stars in the sky and had never felt so insignificant in my life. I couldn’t be here. But I had nowhere else to go.

No. That was a lie.

I drove back to the hospital. When I walked into the waiting room, the Farradays all looked up at me. They hadn’t left.

“I’m not leaving her,” I said, voice broken and raw. I knew I must have looked a sight. I knew because Mrs. Farraday stood and took my hand, bringing me back to a seat beside her. Easton came and sat beside me too.The window on the other side of the room showed Bonnie, lying in the bed. So I focused on her. Wishing on the stars I’d just seen that she would pull through.

I needed her, and I wasn’t sure what the hell I’d do if I didn’t have her in my life. So I would wait. I’d wait for her to wake. And we’d pray for a heart.

Or I was pretty sure I’d lose the beat in mine.

Chapter Twenty-Three

Bonnie

Five days later…

An incessant beep filled my brain. Its rhythm was unwavering. I wanted to go back to sleep, but when I tried to turn over, my body ached. Everywhere ached. I winced and felt something tickling my nose. I tried to move my hand to scratch it, but something was in my hand. It was warm, and I didn’t want it to go. So I tried to hold on.

“Bonnie?” A deeply accented voice drifted into my ears. It made me think of Mozart. My eyes felt gritty as I forced them open. Bright light made me flinch. I blinked until my eyes got used to the light. Things started to become clear. White ceiling. Light in the center of the room. I glanced down. I was in a bed, a pink blanket covering my legs. Then I saw my hand, and the hand it was wrapped in.

I lifted my eyes, confusion thick in my head. But then my gaze collided with a set of blue eyes that immediately stole my breath. “Cromwell,” I said. No noise left my mouth. I tried to clear my throat, but it hurt to swallow. My free hand tried to lift to my throat, but my arm was weak and I could barely move it.

Panic flared inside me. Cromwell moved to sit on the edge of the bed. I stilled, captivated by him as always, as he brought my hand to his lips. His other hand cupped my face. I wanted to cover it with mine. But I couldn’t and I didn’t know why.

“Farraday,” he breathed, relief thick in his voice. It made my heart flutter in my chest.

“Cromwell.” My eyes shimmered as I looked around the room. Then I saw my hand on the bed. Wires were coming from it. Panic took me in its hold.

“Shh.” Cromwell brought his lips to my forehead. I immediately stilled, trying my best to calm down. When he pulled back, I studied his face. For some reason I felt like it had been a lifetime since I’d seen him. I searched my mind for the last time he’d been with me, but everything was muddled and unclear.

But as I surveyed him, I knew last time his eyes had been brighter. I knew he hadn’t had that much dark stubble on his cheeks, and I knew that his hair, although always messy, had never been this unkempt. He had dark circles under his eyes, and he seemed pale. He was dressed as always in a black knit sweater and ripped black jeans. I couldn’t see his feet, but I knew that heavy black boots would be on them.

And his tattoos and piercings were as prominent as they’d ever been. And I knew one thing above everything else: that I loved him. I was convinced I could have forgotten everything about him but that. That I loved him with all my heart.

Cromwell stroked back my hair. I smiled, the movement familiar. He swallowed. “We were on the boat, baby. Do you remember?” I searched my head for the memory. Fuzzy images of the lake came back to me. Birds singing and leaves rustling. Cromwell held my hand tighter. “You had an episode.” Cromwell looked behind him. “Maybe I should get a doctor. To explain it better. Your parents…”

He went to pull away, but I held on. “You,” I whispered. Cromwell sighed and moved his hand over my heart. He clenched his jaw. “You had a heart attack, baby.” His broken-voiced words swam around my head on repeat.Heart attack…heart attack…heart attack…

Fear and shock quickly took me in their thrall, their heavy weights pressing down, suffocating me. I wanted to climb from the bed and escape the heavy, confusing darkness I felt looming over me. But I couldn’t move, so I clung to Cromwell for safety. His finger stroking down my cheek was like water to the fire of fear that blazed inside me. “You made it through, baby. The doctors kept you going.” He gestured to the machines that hissedand beeped around me. “You were in an induced coma while you got better. You’ve been under for five days.” His lip shook. “We’ve all been waiting for you to wake up.”

I closed my eyes, trying to stave off the fear that I refused to let take me over. I breathed, feeling the oxygen tube in my nose. When I opened my eyes again, when I saw the dark circles under his eyes, I asked, “You…stayed…here?”

I thought I saw Cromwell’s eyes shimmer. He leaned in, until it seemed he was everywhere. Blue eyes fixed on mine, showing me in a simple gaze how much he cared. “Where else would I be?” He gave me a flicker of a smile. “I’ve decided that from this day on I go wherever you go.”

Cromwell kissed my lips, and the darkness that had been pressing down on me disappeared. His light chased it away. A tear fell from the corner of my eyes. He wiped it away with his thumb. “I’d better go and tell the doctor and your parents you’re awake.”

He kissed my hand again before walking out of the room. The minute he left, I felt a flash of coldness that I never felt when he was beside me. Cromwell Dean was my warmth. The blazing soul that kept mine tethered to this life.