Page 20 of Jackal's Pride
Unable to give up, I followed her to every corner of her house. When she sat, I sat next to her. When she ate, I stared a hole through her, but when she shoved something inside my mouth, hundreds of flavors burst through at once. My sense of taste was assaulted by whatever food she placed in my mouth. It was good, one she described as salty, then another one was something tangy. I thought this was what humans meant when something wastasty.
I ignored her knowing smirk as I finished whatever was in the dish. We didn’t speak, but I didn’t like that I couldn’t annoy her when she kept distracting me which she did over the next few hours. She kept materializing more and more food and ate whatever it was right in front of me. I tried my hardest to act like she wasn’t bothering me, but I gave myself away every time. My mouth dropped, and I drooled as I watched her eat.
Being hungry further proved to me how strange life was. Demons and humans alike all needed something. Why did you want to put yourself through this agony and live with all these different kinds of pains? First, I had to experience the sorrow of losing someone. Now the hearts made me understand hunger. What else would they force upon me?
Why for the life of me couldn’t I stop letting her mock me with food? I was letting her feed me for Hade’s sake!
I was a plague on mankind. Everyone feared me thanks to my creator. Would they feel the same if they knew I went into hibernation just because I couldn’t handle being alive with feelings?
The one hundred and thirty-seven hearts, beating my ribcage, must have agreed on some level. The pain was all-consuming, but it was also the only thing that ebbed the desire to have whatever food in her hand. Wincing, I grabbed my chest. Experiencing emotions and needing to conceal them were new for me. I didn’t hide anything because I never had any moods to hide before—pain or anger. But with Maureen constantly watching me I realized I needed to learn.
“I really have taken in a giant dog. You’ve done that a lot now,” she finally broke our silence. She had her dark hair tied up. She was… I didn’t know what she was. Her eyes were like black pools that held me spellbound. There was no glancing away when she stared at me. The contrast between her hair and skin was like night and day. I never understood the concept or meaning behind beauty, but…
The delicate curve to her hips covered in the black, tight pants and the full weight of her breasts spilling from the shirt she wore revealed to me the difference between a woman, and what I was. Remembering her hands in my scalp, her palm guiding a rag over my chest…. A hot energy crackled beneath my skin. The heat raging inside me made it impossible to take my eyes off her. I just knew she attracted plenty of men who would want to mate with her.
She pushed herself off the counter and stopped in front of me. She was close enough that I could smell lavender and something almost spicy. I wasn’t lying when I told her that her smell clashed within itself, but I left out how weird it made me feel too and I didn’t like it. There was something almost intoxicating about her. I wondered if she went around making everyone feel so strange. I’d felt enough already and didn’t want to anymore. Having reactions was more a burden than it was fun.
I moved to the right careful not to touch her.I didn’t want the collar attacking me,I reasoned with myself. That was why I was getting away. Chill bumps broke out on my neck as another waft of lavender invaded my nostrils.It was something else.What would have happened if she had continued to wash me? The flesh on the back of my neck was damp. Why was it so hot in here? I wasn’t close enough to detect her body’s warmth yet it was beckoning me all the same. No. That wasn’t right either… I was just soawareof her that it was stifling the kitchen.
I was so fucking over emotions.
As soon as I got angry, the hearts got angrier. It was like they were reminding me that I didn’t get to be mad. They did. They were dead. Not me. For a moment, the dark abyss of a guilty conscience swallowed me whole. Why was I stuck living eternally when I had no desire to live?
I sensed I was broken long before I understood that I really was broken. I was never pieced together to be like anyone else. Instead, I was a plague dropper. A killer who couldn’t even comprehend that what he did was wrong. I thought I was doing them a favor. From the outside, seeing them go through so many hardships… Why would they want to live?You were starving to death, anyway. Humans needed food to sustain themselves yet the hunter came home empty most nightsthat was what I thought before I stepped into their village.If it wasn’t the need for food, it was the weather. They froze to death or suffered sickness from the sun.I still didn’t get it.When I delivered disease, it would all eventually end. The hurt on their faces. I didn’t understand their pain nor feel it, but all the same Isawit. I was created to help along the Devil’s ambition. This I always knew. I wasn’t made to care or ask why.
But the hearts were determined to make me miserable. Remind me of my brokenness. My inability to understand even with feelings.
“Why do you keep grabbing your chest?” Her voice pulled me out of my thoughts. I opened my eyes and met hers. She seemed startled before her gaze hardened. “Not that I care. You just keep randomly grabbing it.”
“It’s nothing,” I told her gruffly as I moved away from her and her scent once more. Fucking. Shit. Damn. I took in the smell of lavender once again, the anger and heat from earlier rose like a phoenix inside me. When it wasn’t the hearts, it washer. Her smell. Her beautiful face, tempting body, and challenging eyes. It fed a beast inside me that roared to life every time she neared.
I didn’t know how to deal with the onslaught of emotions.
“Are you sure? Anything that causes you pain is my pleasure.” It was strange how I felt her arrogance long before I saw it. Her flawless posture was straight as she gawked at me. She was still too fucking close.
“Get away from me before I tear into your neck with my teeth.” My canines lengthened. Her face turned a deep shade of red. “I can’t stand the smell of you!”
It was literally driving me mad—worse than the one hundred and thirty-seven hearts beating in my chest.
“What the fuck!” She hissed back. “Then leave. No one’s telling you to stay.” She materialized two tiny swords and pointed them at me.
“Not until you take this thing off of me!” I yanked at the collar.
“Never,” she said with venom dripping off her tongue.
“I’ll kill you,” I promised.
She smirked. “Good luck with that.” She twirled on the tips of her black leather boots, thrusting her ass out in the process. Something about her actions made my nostrils flare, and I was blistering hot. This was anger mixed with something else, I think. Then again, I could just be furious. Anything was possible.
She faded right before me. She knew I’d follow. I materialized my portal chip and followed her scent. The Devil could travel anywhere without a portal chip. I never understood why he didn’t make his creations with the same ability. I was fully clothed when I dropped down into the place she’d gone, but it didn’t stop the necks from snapping around just to get a peek at me. Thousands of years spent asleep made me forget all the attention I got as an entity. The power I held dimmed everyone else’s in the building except for Maureen’s. Her power was like a sunset. I’d yet to see her use much of it, but the orange shadowy presence flowed around her freely—calm yet ready to strike at any given moment. She didn’t let people see it. Meanwhile, mine ran rampant all through the room much like my anger. I wasn’t good at soothing it either.
News of my appearance tonight would reach the ears of every demon in the Underworld. Demons, like humans, loved to spread stories and gossip.
Glancing around the room, gave me no idea of what type of place we were in. A foul odor—the stench of demons, booze, blood, and sex—hit my nostrils. I tried to shake it off, but it did no good. In the center of the room, two demons slung punches at each other while various couples groped one another in dark corners. A noisy card game took place at a far table. Maureen’s voice drifted toward me as she spoke to a bald warlock.
“I see Gavin is hiding himself after losing.”
“I see you brought your friend,” the warlock said. My hackles rose as I met his eyes and he smiled. “How’s that going?”