Page 29 of Longing for More

One that tugged on my heart forcefully.

After I had finished opening all of my gifts, I watched as Ryder opened his, emotion filling my eyes. As much as I loved gift receiving, I loved gift giving even more. The first and second gifts were small—picture frames of our last few dates, and one of the newest Kindles for his equally matching reading addiction.

It was the third one, and the one I made him save for last, that excited me.

I watched as he pulled out a stuffed teddy bear wearing a Marine Corps uniform, complete in work camo and its own dog tag. His face pinched as he stared down at it, confused. Chuckling, he twisted it around to face the both of us. “You got me a stuffed animal?”

I shook my head. “It’s not for you.”

He looked at me, squinting. Lucas did the same.

I continued. “It’s for our future baby.”

Both of them slowly blinked at me. “But…you’re not pregnant.”

“No. But, before everything, Ryder and I had talked about getting a surrogate. Or if anyone would be willing to donate. So, this was me essentially telling you, ‘yes,’ and let’s try. Before…everything. I had it already planned for when you’d come home.” My head shook as I laughed nervously. “You just kinda beat me to it.”

Ryder and Lucas exchanged gazes, and I narrowed my eyes as Ryder began laughing. It tore through him, almost hysterical, and echoed off the room. I turned to Lucas, and confusion wracked through me as his own shoulders shook in a silent laughter.

“What?” I demanded.

I thought I was being thoughtful. What the fuck was happening.

Lucas broke his laughter first. “We had one more gift to give you, but…I think I need to return mine.”

Confusion didn’t even match what I was feeling at that point. “Okay?”

Ryder reached behind him, still chuckling and nearly needing to wipe tears from his eyes, and pulled out a small, pink package out of his jeans pocket. Lucas leaned forward, doing the same, and I watched as they placed the items in front of me.

One was a pregnancy test box.

The other was an after-morning contraceptive.

I frowned at the items in front of me. Looking them both in the eyes, I voiced my confusion. “What does this mean?”

Lucas spoke first, his voice hoarse. “It means, we hadn’t talked this through yet. And there’s…so fucking much to talk about. But we were going to leave the final choice up to you.”

I blinked. Twice. “One more time?”

Ryder spoke this time. “If you want things to go back exactly as they were before last night, and this morning, they will. And you can take Lucas’ gift. Or, if you want to try this out, then you can take mine.”

Realization hit me.

Boys were fucking idiots.

I turned towards Ryder first. Then Lucas. I wanted to discuss so much with both of them, and I knew we had a plentiful amount of serious discussions in our future. But, in a moment of blind-trusting faith, I shook my head and leaned forward to grab the pregnancy test.

The words that came out of my mouth, with the teddy bear that had already proclaimed my decision into the world, surprised no one. “I want to be a mom.”

“I know,” they said, somehow in unison.

I rolled my eyes as I realized I would have to spell it out for them. Looking at Lucas, I added, “I have questions.”

“Believe me, I do, too.”

“And conditions.”

“Conditions?”