Page 12 of Fervor
I shrugged. “I don’t know. I guess I don’t pay close enough attention to myself to notice.”
“Right. I’m sure there’s something. We all have something that we do that’s specific to who we are, no matter how unique or not.”
I nodded and sat there trying to think of the small things I did. I could feel a frown form on my brow as I thought hard.
Disrupting my thought process, Kerri continued her questioning. “What are your love languages, and how do you prefer receiving love? Your response was acts of service and words of affirmation. At some point, all of these could be my love language. My needs change with situations. Sometimes I may crave physical touch or want a gift that shows how much I’m appreciated. I believe as we age, our primary needs tend to change a bit. Words of affirmation is big for me because I’ve been alone for so long. I just want to know what I mean to someone else… that I’m enough.”
I nodded and lowered my head as she stared at me. “You are enough, queen. But I understand sometimes needing that validation… hearing someone else express things about you that you already know. I get it.”
I gave her a tight smile. This interview was just as enlightening as my counseling sessions. Companionship was something I craved, but seeing it up close with Giselle and Gentry, then Keke and Vegas, only made me long for it even more.
“How much time do you ideally like to spend with your partner versus alone? You said, I haven’t had a partner in years, so I would probably be clingy at first. I’m always alone, so I probably won’t need any alone time at first.”
She looked up at me and smiled. “Okay. Last question. What three adjectives would you use to describe your ideal partner?” She paused and smiled. “You said respectful, loyal, and trustworthy.”
I nodded. “I think those qualities say it all. Even if we don’t agree, if he’s respectful, the arguments won’t be as bad.”
“That’s realistic thinking.” She nodded and smiled again. I watched her type a bit on her iPad, then she stood from her seat. I did the same as she extended her hand.
“Oh! One more thing. Physical attributes. Do you have any preferences?”
I closed my eyes, and Harlem immediately popped into my head.Jesus.“Tall, medium to dark brown skin, no braids, and a nice beard and smile.”
I opened my eyes to find her staring at me. It was like she knew I was visualizing someone. “Well, we are done here. I will forward your information to the next department that will match you with your ideal partner. They will reach out to you when they find a match. That could be as quick as a couple of days or as long as a month, but hopefully, you will hear from them soon.”
“Thank you so much, Kerri.”
I walked out of the building feeling extremely optimistic about my appointment. Operation find Nique-Nique a husband was underway.
Igot home from the gym and quickly hopped in the shower. Today was the day I would be going to Arranged Hearts. They squeezed me in today since someone had canceled their appointment. I’d been chilling and sticking to myself this week. While I wanted to call Vegas after all that bullshit from the club, I decided to leave well enough alone. If they said I shouldn’t be with her, then maybe I shouldn’t.
There had to be a logical reason for them to say that, being that they were both married. So I knew they weren’t hating or fucking around with her. They considered her a sister. Vegas had said there was some trauma there. I remembered Mo getting into it with Yonkers, but the reason why had still evaded me. I couldn’t help but think that that reason had something to do with Yunique. Did Mo do something to her?
I could remember him flirting with a girl my age when I was fourteen. That nigga had no morals, and as an adult, I was gladhe didn’t play a role in raising my brother and me. There was no telling what type of bullshit we would have picked up on if he had. The only things I could remember ever learning from him was shit we didn’t need to learn, like fucking, smoking, and drinking… not to mention hustling.
I couldn’t say he actually taught us those things, but we surely watched him and picked up on them. Harlan used to sneak blunts he’d rolled out of his stash when he would hang around to fuck on our mama. He and I were only a year apart. We may as well had been twins, especially since our mother named us like we were. We looked a lot alike as well. He would sneak the blunts, and I would sneak the beer. We couldn’t have been any older than seven and eight years old.
I’d been racking my brain all week about what could have possibly gone down back then, and I wanted to call Vegas bad as hell and beg him to tell me. Yunique was so damn beautiful and intelligent as hell. I wanted to get to know her. In my experience, a nigga like me didn’t run across women like her often. I actually felt like I had a chance, despite her verbal rejection. Her body wanted me. I could tell from her hard nipples that showed through the thin fabric of her romper.
However, she said she had an appointment with this company to find her future husband. I didn’t totally believe in the process, but when I researched them online Sunday, I was intrigued. They had an extremely high success rate, over 95 percent. Seeing all the smiles on the couples’ faces only intrigued me more, especially the black ones. There were more black people on there than I would have expected.
When I saw a wedding picture of a voluptuous woman and her groom from like a year and a half ago, I noticed a familiar face. Yunique was her maid of honor. This was where she got the idea from, and apparently, things had worked out well for them.Getting married at first sight had me somewhat nervous, but I would give it a go.
I was ready for stability. Since I couldn’t seem to find that the conventional way, I supposed I would have to be unconventional. Yunique had gone Monday, and they had probably already paired her with somebody, being that it was Friday. My reason for choosing to go through with this was simply to try to be paired with her, but I had to be realistic. Most likely, I wouldn’t be paired with her, but I could possibly be paired with someone just as gorgeous and intelligent.
Whoever that woman was deserved my best effort and my genuineness. She deserved everything my mama told me I could be for a woman. As her oldest son, she said she always knew I would treat women right simply by the way I treated her and how I taught Harlan to treat her when he tried to get out of pocket, watching Mo’s dusty ass. I just hoped whoever they matched me with would be someone I could build with and that would have made Mama proud.
After taking my shower, I heard my phone ringing. I quickly made my way to my bedroom to see it was Vegas. I frowned slightly and answered the phone in a defensive manner, on guard for bullshit. “What’s up?” I answered.
“What’s up, man? I just wanted to apologize for how shit went down last weekend. I’m usually not one for apologies, but when I saw that Yunique looked slightly disappointed that you were gone, I felt bad. While I know it was for the best, I still need to apologize. I’m hoping this shit don’t come back to bite me in the ass, but I feel like you’ve always been solid. I would have never known you were that nigga’s son otherwise.”
I remained quiet, waiting to see what he would say. After a moment, he said, “Yonkers and Mo got into it because Mo was trying to make a move on his wife… Yunique and Kee’s mother.They hated Mo. Yonkers didn’t see the snake he was until then, but Yunique and their mother had known long before.”
“Naw. I know you ain’t finna say what I think you are. You don’t have to tell me anything more. I see why y’all were adamant about me leaving her alone. Although that nigga don’t mean shit to me, I could see how fucked up that would be if she ever had to find out. I appreciate you for telling me that much.”
“I ain’t told you shit, other than they had a problem with his grimy ass.”
“That’s more than enough. I can put two and two together. She don’t too much care for street niggas, and now, I can see why. Are y’all still out here?”