Page 110 of Accepting Fate
His head snaps at me with a shocked look on his face, then back to the road. "I love it, pretty girl, but can I ask why?” His voice is low and unsure.
Oh, my sweet man. He has no idea how much he has changed me in our short amount of time.
"Because it’s where I realized you were my safe space. Even if it all ends tomorrow, I want to remember for the rest of my life the person that helped me see there was more to life than the fear of what lurks in the shadows.”
Under his breath I hear him mutter, "Fuck.”
"You are my world, Bear. Just like I am yours. We may go at different speeds and come from different worlds, but you changed me for the better and I will be eternally grateful.”
He doesn’t say anything, and I leave him in his thoughts to let my words sink in. I know I surprised him and I tell him all the time I’m happy to have him, but I think the idea of a tattoo on my body that is significant to us changes things.
I’m a permanent fixture in his life and I just told him he’s one in mine and I freaking love it.
After giving him some time to collect himself, I try my best to keep the conversation light and steer clear of dark and twisty topics. At some point, I even break out in a game of ‘I Spy’ even though it's pitch black. Grayson knows exactly what I’m doing but he plays along.
Hours tick by and I can tell we are close because Gray grows silent. His grip on my leg is tighter and he looks like he’s about ten seconds away from flipping a U-turn and driving back to Cliff Haven.
Landon wasn’t exaggerating, this place is off the grid. We’ve been driving on gravel roads for the past twenty minutes and I’ve seen nothing but trees. I can’t be sure because it’s dark, but I feel like we just drove up a small mountain. Fear creeps up on me out of nowhere but I stuff it back down. I need to be strong for Gray, so he isn’t worried and distracted. It would kill me if he got hurt because he was too focused on me.
As we crest the top of a hill, Grayson kills his headlights and pulls off to the side of the road. The other boys pass us and turn around to face us on the opposite side of the road.
Turning to me in his seat, Grayson takes my hand in his. "I apologize now if I get short with you or say something mean. I’m stressed the fuck out having you here. If anything bad ever happened to you and I wasn’t able to protect you, I would-”
I interrupt him before he can finish that sentence. "Grayson, stop. Nothing bad is going to happen to me. Wes will be with me the entire time. I wouldn’t have come if I didn’t feel safe with you or your brothers. Will I see stuff that will be hard to forget? Probably. But that’s my job. I see people at their worst and help them get back on their feet. I need you to focus on your job. Now get your ass out of this truck so you can save that little man. I can’t do my job if you don’t do yours, so go. Or me coming out here was for nothing.”
Grayson stares at me like I just spoke in a different language. Sensing he will probably continue to stare, I stick my tongue out at him and lean over the console and kiss him.
Sitting back in my seat, I wink at him and look out the front of the truck.
"Logan?”
"Yeah?” I say, continuing to look out the window.
"I love you.”
It’s like the world stops spinning. Slowly, I turn my head to look at him. "W-What did you just say?”
Grayson smiles and takes my hand in his, turning my arm over and kissing the tiny butterfly tattoo I have on my wrist. "I love you, Angel. You don’t have to say it back, but I couldn’t go another second without telling you what I’ve been dying to say for months.”
Months? My mind is going a mile a minute. Of course I love him, too, but I didn’t expect him to say it now.
"Wait, why are you telling me this now? Are you saying it because you think something is going to happen to you?”
He reaches over and lifts me over the center console onto his lap. With both hands he cups my face, holding my eyes hostage with his. "Angel, nothing is going to happen to me. This is really going to be easy. I said it because I have felt it for a while. I love you. Nothing is going to change that. Ever. I have shown you every side of me. You truly see me, all of me. You don’t have to say it back, but I needed to say it.”
But I do love him.
"I love you, too.” It flies out of my mouth so fast, I wouldn’t believe I said it if it wasn’t for the shocked expression on Grayson’s face.
Fuck it. He deserves to know. This is a step further into taking my life back into my own hands.
"I love you, Grayson. I told you earlier you showed me how to live outside of my fear. You have shown me how to live and stop hiding. I’m scared to tell you because I still think it could all be taken away, but I want you to know. And I want to tell you everything but not tonight because we have a little man that needs us more.”
I barely finish before he crashes his lips to mine.
When we break apart, he runs his hands up and down my back and he says, "You’re never going to be taken away from me and I’m not going anywhere.”
I wind my arms around his neck and bury my face in his chest. We stay like this until static comes over the radio that sits in the cup holder. I take this as my signal to return to my seat and mentally prepare myself.