Page 54 of Shattered Trinket
“Ah, so you’re a ladies’ man, then?”
I hear a hint of jealousy in her tone, though she tries to hide it. I don’t think she even notices, and it only makes my grin widen as I bark out a laugh.
“Hardly.”
A mix of confusion and amusement dances across her face, her lips forming a subtle smile as her brows knit together. Nervously, I run my fingers through my hair, feeling the strands slip between my fingertips before cupping my head in my hand and propping my arm on my knee.
“I dated a bit when I was in high school, but nothin’ too serious. A few dates out tae the local pub here an thare, dances an’ the like. But that was about as far as any o’ that went.”
“Well, that’s okay. Even people who’ve been on tons of dates are inexperienced with them. Besides, I think you’re a lot better at this than you think.”
Clearing my throat, I avert my gaze from hers while stifling a laugh and covering my face. Gods. I always imagined that when the time came to share this fun little fact about myself with my omega, I’d be a lot more confident. But suddenly, a wave of self-consciousness washes over me, causing me to second guess the timing of confessing this to her. As I glance back at her, I can’t help but notice the confusion etched on her face, and I inhale deeply before releasing a sigh.
“I’m inexperienced in more than that, lass. I’m uh, ya know. I’m still a virgin. So, when I say inexperienced, I really meaninexperienced.”
I clear my throat again awkwardly when her eyes widen and soft pink lips part, the urge to kiss her difficult to ignore. Sitting up straight, I nonchalantly shrug and fixate my gaze on the tranquil expanse of water. The prolonged silence weighs heavily on me, causing my shoulders to tense up and my ears to burn with unease, until I feel her hand on my back. My muscles bunch at the touch before completely relaxing as the warmth of her palm seeps through the fabric of my shirt. Before I realize it, a soft purr is rumbling out of me, and when I look at the wee omega’s face, there are unshed tears glistening in her eyes and the sweetest expression painting her features.
“There’s nothing to be embarrassed about. It’s not like I’m the most experienced person out there. Besides, I think it’s really admirable,” she murmurs, cheeks darkening and a wobbly smile on her lips.
“I’m no’ embarrassed. It’s juist harder tae admit tae ye than I thought it would be,” I admit with a cringe.
She tilts her head, pursing her lips, which only makes her look even more adorable and kissable, and I can’t stop the small smile that fights its way through.
“Why?”
“Because lass. I saved myself for my omega. I saved myself… for ye. I juist didnae know it was for ye until I met ye.”
Her lips part as a gasp escapes her, and she leans closer to me without even realizing it. It’s like that invisible rope is right there again, pulling us closer and closer together until our noses are nearly touching. I cup her cheek in my hand, and when she rubs against my palm, lips trembling slightly as a tear slides across the bridge of her nose, my chest aches.
“Och, lass, dinnae worry. I promise I’m a very studious student.”
I try to joke, but it doesn’t make her laugh like I’d hoped it would. Instead, another tear falls and my gut clenches, unsure of what I said or did that upset her and completely clueless on how to fix it. Gods, I should have asked the guys to come with me. It figures I’d be the one to screw this up from the get-go. I knew I would!
I make a noise in my throat when she moves away and sits up, wiping her eyes with the sleeves of her cardigan. My hands clench in my lap as she avoids my eyes, and the distance she’s put between us feels vast, though it’s hardly even a foot. Still, the absence of her body heat leaves me feeling bereft and yearning to pull her back to my side.
“Wow, I’m so sorry. I’m fine, I promise. I just—” she stops, shaking her head with a wry laugh.
“Ye have nothin’ tae apologize for. I’m the one that’s sorry. I dinnae know whit I said or did tae upset ye, but I didnae mean tae, lass.”
My throat feels tight, and I’m struggling with my need to hold and comfort her and the need to kick my own arse for upsetting her. Things were going so well.
“Oh, no. No, it’s not you. You didn’t do anything, Zeke.”
She exhales deeply, pivoting towards me and hugging the koala I got her tightly to her chest for comfort. With her chinresting on it’s head, she gazes at me intently, her blue eyes carefully studying every feature of my face.
“I think it’s beautiful, what you just shared with me. I just wish I could sit here and tell you the same thing you just told me.”
Her smile is sad and her eyes still glisten as she tries to hold back her tears. I shake my head and reach for her hand, clasping it in mine as I look deep into her eyes.
“I dinnae care that ye’re no’ a virgin. I didnae make this choice wi’ the idea that my omega would be juist as untouched as me. I did it because I knew when I found ye, the wait would have all been worth it.”
When more tears glide down her cheeks and her lips are trembling, I feel my own eyes burning. Her hand in mine is limp, but I still don’t let go, needing to let her know that I’m right here, and not going anywhere.
“You don’t understand. I-Iwasa virgin before Victor found me. So, if he hadn’t…” she trails off, a flash of anger crossing her eyes before she closes them and takes a deep breath. “I know there’s no sense in me thinking about what ifs, but sometimes it’s hard when I’m reminded of just how much I’ve lost. None of you know the true extent of what I went through yet, and I’m so afraid of getting too used to this idea of alphas and… multiple mates, just for you to find out how truly damaged I am and decide that I’m not what you really want,” she cries, burying her face in her arms, shoulders shaking.
I grasp what she’s saying without her explicitly stating it, and my stomach roils as my mind shows me awful scenarios with Cozy and a faceless man taking what she didn’t freely give. So many choices were stolen from her, and the fury bubbling inside me has me yearning to jump up and find a secluded spot to release it. I’m filled with an intense rage on her behalf, and the violent thoughts swirling in my mind are unsettling, even to myself. Once again, I swallow that rage down andtake deep breaths to calm myself because I want to avoid any misunderstanding where she might think it’s because of her and notforher.
Slowly, I reach for her and when my hands land on her sides, she looks up at me in surprise. She doesn’t stop me when I pull her to me, keeping contact with her red-rimmed, teary eyes, and I keep dragging her to me until I can pull her in my lap, cradling her against my chest. She tenses at first, and immediately my chest vibrates with a soft purr against her head. When she relaxes against me, my purr gets louder, and she shivers against me before deflating and sighing out contentedly.