Page 13 of Rescue My Heart
McKenna responded, her lips moving against Mazey’s with equal intensity. The warmth of her breath sent a shiver down Mazey’s spine. McKenna’s hands hovered at her waist, hesitant but firm, like she was torn between pulling her closer and holding herself back. But then, as if something clicked between them, McKenna’s grip tightened, drawing Mazey in until there was no space left between them. The connection was magnetic, their bodies drawn together like two pieces of a puzzle finally fitting into place.
Mazey felt herself melting into McKenna, her knees weakening, her mind buzzing with sensations she had never felt before. Her senses were overwhelmed, the softness of McKenna’s lips, the faint taste of mint lingering on them, the warmth of her skin as their bodies pressed together. Time seemed to stretch, each second marked only by the thudding of her heart and the quiet hitch in her breath.
The kiss deepened even further, and Mazey felt like she was losing herself in it. She was vaguely aware of the weight of the fire gear she was still wearing, the bulky fabric making it harder to feel McKenna as fully as she wanted. And the faint scent of smoke that clung to the fabric and perhaps also to McKenna’s hair. But none of that mattered. All she could focus on was McKenna, on the way her lips moved, the subtle gasp she made as Mazey shifted closer, the gentle but undeniable force of their shared desire.
Mazey’s head spun, her thoughts spiraling into a chaotic mix of wonder, fear, and excitement. She wasn’t used to this, to feeling so out of control, so swept up in the heat of the moment. But with McKenna, she didn’t want to be in control. She wanted to let go, to surrender to whatever this was between them, even if she didn’t fully understand it yet.
Then, just as quickly as it had started, it was over. Mazey pulled back, her heart racing, panic flooding her veins. What did she just do?
McKenna blinked, her expression a mixture of surprise and something unreadable. But she didn’t pull away, didn’t flinch. Still, she straightened herself, returning to her professional demeanor, though Mazey could sense the slight shift in her posture.
Mazey, trying to keep her composure, immediately pretended nothing had happened. “Alright, uh...so, what’snext?” Her voice was breathy, her heart still thudding in her chest.
McKenna cleared her throat, nodding slightly as she moved toward the equipment rack. “Next, I’ll show you how to use the safety equipment.”
The rest of the time went by in a blur. McKenna went through the motions, explaining the gear, how to handle certain emergencies, and what to do in high-pressure situations. But Mazey wasn’t really listening. She nodded in all the right places, asked a few questions to seem engaged, but her mind kept wandering back to the kiss.
Had she imagined the tension between them or was it real? And why did it feel like McKenna wasn’t freaking out like she was? Mazey tried to act natural, tried to focus, but she couldn’t stop replaying the moment in her head. The softness of McKenna’s lips, the warmth of her breath, the way her tongue pushed into Mazey’s mouth, claiming her. The shock that Mazey hadn’t just admired her, she wanted her. That realization was terrifying and exhilarating at the same time.
I want her to fuck me.
As McKenna finished demonstrating the last piece of equipment, she turned to Mazey. “You got all that?”
Mazey blinked, snapping back to attention. “Yeah, yeah, I got it,” she said quickly, though she couldn’t have repeated a single word McKenna had just said.
“Good.” McKenna’s eyes lingered on Mazey for just a beat too long, something unreadable in her gaze. Then she gave a small smile, the kind that seemed to say she understood more than Mazey realized. “You did great today.”
“Thanks,” Mazey replied, her voice quieter than she’d intended.
McKenna nodded, stepping back slightly. “Well, I guess I’ll see you around then.”
Mazey swallowed hard, trying to gather her thoughts, but nothing came out the way she wanted. She forced a smile. “Yeah, see you around.”
As Mazey turned to leave, her mind raced. What had she done? What had just happened? She hadn’t planned to kiss McKenna, but now that she had, she didn’t regret it. Not entirely.
I want to get on my knees for her..
Mazey stepped outside, the crisp air hitting her face like a splash of cold water. She took a deep breath, trying to steady her racing heart. She still didn’t know what to make of her feelings for McKenna, but one thing was certain: this was more than admiration.
As Mazey drove home, her mind spiraled with questions. Everything she thought she knew about herself seemed to unravel. She had believed she was straight her whole life. There was never a doubt in her mind. No hints, no lingering thoughts that maybe she was attracted to women. At least, that’s what she’d always told herself. But now, in the quiet of her car, her thoughts became more complicated. Had she really been oblivious to her feelings or had she simply pushed them down because it was easier? Because that’s what society expected from her?
The kiss with McKenna had shaken her. It had felt so natural, so right in the moment. But now, she couldn’t help but worry that it might have been a fluke, a fleeting impulse brought on by the tension of the day. Yet, deep down, Mazey knew that wasn’t the case. It wasn’t just the kiss that had affected her. It was McKenna herself. The way she made Mazey feel: safe, understood, seen. And that feeling both thrilled and terrified her.
She gripped the steering wheel tighter, her knuckles turning white. Loving the way McKenna made her feel was one thing,but the questions it raised were something else entirely. Could she really be attracted to a woman? She had never seriously considered the possibility before, not even once. The thought alone made her chest tighten with anxiety.
Mazey tried to brush it off as a moment of confusion, a one-time thing, but she knew better. The more she replayed the kiss in her mind, the more it became impossible to deny the truth. She had felt something real, something undeniable, and that meant she had to face the fact that she was somewhere on the queer spectrum. Bisexual? Pansexual? Lesbian? What the hell was this? There was no escaping that now.
The reality of it hit her like a wave. This realization was terrifying in ways she hadn’t anticipated. The scrutiny that could come if word ever got out gnawed at her. She could already imagine the headlines, the gossip, the endless speculation. She was a public figure, after all, and her life had always been under a microscope. But the fear of what people might think or say, though very real, seemed distant compared to the storm of emotions she felt inside.
Still, she pushed those thoughts to the back of her mind, focusing instead on the memory of McKenna. The closeness she had felt with her, the way their bodies had seemed to fit together so naturally. And, of course, the kiss. Mazey's lips still tingled when she thought about it, but alongside the thrill, a seed of doubt crept in.
Was pretending the kiss didn’t happen the right move? She’d acted like it hadn’t meant anything, but what if that was a mistake? What if McKenna had felt something too? And, more troubling still, what if Mazey’s sudden forwardness had made McKenna uncomfortable? She hadn’t even asked McKenna if she was into women; she had just assumed. Mazey cringed at the thought. Had she overstepped?
She had based her assumptions on McKenna’s appearance and profession, which now seemed ridiculously shallow. Just because McKenna was strong and confident, worked in a male-dominated field, and carried herself with a kind of quiet dominant power didn’t automatically mean she was into women. Mazey realized she had been projecting her own confusion and curiosity onto McKenna, assuming they were on the same page without ever actually knowing. That thought weighed heavily on her. What if McKenna didn’t see her that way at all?
Her stomach churned with uncertainty. She replayed their time together in her mind, searching for clues in McKenna’s body language, in the way she had reacted to the kiss. But everything was a blur now, muddled by Mazey’s own rising panic. Maybe McKenna had just been caught off guard, unsure of how to react in the moment. Maybe she hadn’t felt the same spark that Mazey had.
Mazey sighed deeply, her heart heavy with conflicting emotions. She knew she had to talk to McKenna, to clear the air, but the idea of confronting her felt daunting. What if McKenna didn’t want to talk about it? What if she really was straight, and the kiss had only made things awkward between them?