Page 83 of See It Through
“I missed you at the house today. Wanted to see your face.”
“I wasn’t there long.” She leaned her shoulder against the doorjamb, not inviting me in. “What’s up?”
My brow dropped low at her lackadaisical response. I’d missed her enough to swallow my pride and seek her out and all I was getting in return was indifference. What the hell was going on?
“Like I said, I wanted to see you. I told myself you weren’t avoiding me. That I was being needy by missing you. Seeing as you aren’t happy I showed up here and you’re not asking me inside, I don’t think I was being paranoid, was I?”
Hannah sighed. “Maybe not. I needed a step back to think.”
My jaw went rigid. Suspecting it and hearing it were two entirely different things. I’d never wanted to be so wrong in my whole life.
“Yeah? Care to share any conclusions you’ve drawn?”
Her fingers curled around the doorframe as she shifted her weight from one bare foot to the other. Tongue darting out to lick her lips, her eyes slid sideways, avoiding mine.
“I’m ready to call it a day, Rem,” she uttered without much life.
I jerked back. “On us?”
“Yeah. I’m sorry, but I can’t see this going anywhere, and it doesn’t make sense to keep dragging the inevitable out.” Her tone was flat. I couldn’t say if she was upset, relieved, angry, or somewhere in between.
I felt like I’d been knocked flat on my ass. “Not going anywhere?”
“Mmm. My life is here, in Sugar Brush, and yours is out there. We can keep having fun until you leave, but it would be smarter to end it before one of us gets attached. It’s for the best.”
“Hannah…Jesus. I’m feeling a little fuckin’ blindsided here.” I dug the heel of my hand into my temple. “Just like that, you’re ending us, no discussion?”
Her expression tightened, mouth pinching. “There doesn’t need to be a big discussion. It only takes one ‘no,’ and I’m saying it. I don’t want to do this anymore. Let’s move on from it, all right?”
I looked at her but couldn’t read her. Not a single thought or emotion. She’d locked it all down. Something like panic stirred in me. She was really doing this.
“Nothing about this is all right. There’s no reason to end things. It’s too good to stop it. I don’t want this.”
She sucked in a stuttered breath. “I do, Rem. It’s too much for me. We shouldn’t have gotten started in the first place, and that’s my fault. I’m sorry, but I can’t continue.”
Putting my hand on the wall outside her door, I leaned in, getting close to her face. “This isn’t right, you deciding for us without any warning or discussion.”
“I get that, but it was going to end anyway.” She took a step back, crossing her arms over her chest. “I’ll stay out of the house while you’re in town. Make it as easy on us as possible.”
“How is this going to be easy?”
“I don’t know. But it’ll be harder later.” She raised her fist to her chest. “Can we just let it be? I don’t want to fight with you, I—”
“Want me to walk away?”
She didn’t deny it, and I felt like a goddamn fool standing outside her door, not even given the courtesy of being invited off the stoop to be dumped.
“I’m sorry,” she whispered.
“All right, Hannah. If that’s what you want, I’ll give it to you.”
Even though it killed me to do it, I turned my back on her and walked away. I got two steps down when what sounded like a whimper made me pause and turn back. When I did, all I saw was Hannah disappearing behind her door as she closed it.
That was that.
Fuck.
How could that be that?