Page 56 of Chasing Mr. Prefect
“Remember how you wrote me off, the day Miss Co brought me to your office? I didn’t want a repeat of that, Cholo. I wanted—no,neededvalidation that I could do things your way and prove that I was much more than a problematic kid serving aform of school punishment. I had to work my ass off. Oh, and that’s not counting the fact that I had to fix my issues with my family, too. Is that why you’re saying this? You like me now because I stopped being the bad egg? Did I do well enough this time around?”
I had to catch my breath after this long pronouncement.
Cholo was shaking his head. “I’m sorry,” he said, voice soft. Apologetic. “I didn’t know you thought of it that way. Ikaw ‘yan, eh. I really don’t want to lose any of that. I’m sorry if I made you feel that you had to change. ”
“But how could I not, Cholo?” I asked. “You and I are pretty similar. You even had it worse than I did in some ways but you handled things so differently. How could I not want to be like you? You’re strong enough to handle the painful things and you don’t feel the need to be a rebel just to prove a point. I thought that maybe I shouldn’t be such a brooding asshole when there are people like you who exist. People who could forgive.”
He shook his head, eyes sad. “I’m not as forgiving as you think. I’m still so angry about a number of things and it’s always just there. I could put it away for a while but it would always come back in full measure. I saw some of that in you, too, and I let myself get too close that I got hooked.” He walked towards me and put both his hands on the sides of my head, gently wiping my tears with his fingers. “All I could think of now is you. How to free you from this pain and how I can’t. I’m just as wounded and no matter what you might think, that makes me just as scared as you are about things.
That makes me feel that I’m not enough for you either but enough or not, I want to be here. With you.”
I had no idea why I started crying in earnest. I never thought anyone would want to be with me the way he did, complications and all.
“You make me want to be better. More than I care to admit,” I replied and his eyes shone with hope. “And I want to be there for you, too.”
I smiled as Cholo kissed my forehead. He held the back of my head with one hand as he did so. “I thought home was a place,” he said against my hair. “But now I seem to have found mine in a person, someone who was in the same block and classroom all this time.”
He put my hand in his and I looked up to meet his gaze.
“I love you,” he said now. “And I just want to be home.”
“I want to be home, too,” was my reply and I smiled back at him, feeling like my heart would burst.
He leaned over and kissed me, carefully at first, seemingly unfamiliar. But like his heart, his lips settled on mine, recognizing them as their own, as though returning home.
And it was. It always was.
CHAPTER 24
The part where Cholo said that everyone knew it but me must have been true, as my family did not even say anything when we attended mass with them the next day while holding hands.
“Looks like they didn’t hear us arguing,” Cholo said after the mass, because I’d been worried. “And I went back to the sofa at six this morning… I think you can chill now.”
“That champagne must’ve knocked them out pretty good, huh,” I said and I found Liana giggling beside me as we walked out of the church.
“Not me,” she said when I gave her a quizzical look. “I know he stayed in your room.”
Cholo and I both stopped in our tracks, shocked.
“Luh, teenagers?” she teased. “Ok lang ‘yan. The parents were once young too. Doesn’t seem like your dad minded when we saw the sofa empty.”
“Nothing happened!” I said to her, and Cholo gave me a look. “I mean?—”
“What do you mean nothing?” Cholo demanded.
Liana walked away laughing as I tried to reason with him that making out and cuddling was no reason for Liana to tease us over.
Cholo cameover to our house a lot during the holidays. Dad and Cris were only too happy to let him eat dinner with us almost every night.
“Vinnie talks more when you’re here!” said Liana, which made Cholo grin at me from ear to ear.
They also made him bring Potato over all the time. Sometimes, Cholo would turn up unannounced with food enough for my entire family. He watched NBA games with Dad, too, and I could not really keep up anymore when they started discussing stats and stuff.
One time, I excused myself to get water from the fridge and he followed me.
“Bored?” Cholo teased the moment we got out of earshot.
I glared at him as I opened the ref. “Since when have you been a basketball fan?”