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“Yeah. I’m kind of tired, and believe it or not, I really like doing that for you.”

He was an incredibly smart and observant man, but he was also tired and overwhelmed by postcoital satiation. He didn’t notice that she was turned on. He believed what she told him. “Okay. Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.” She kissed him again—just a brief press of her lips—and then got up to go to the bathroom. There, she sat on the toilet and cried for less than a minute, shaking silently as emotion wracked her.

She wasn’t used to holding back like this.

She hated lying to him.

But she needed to protect herself, and there had to be a limit to how much she opened herself up to him. She was too emotional already today. She couldn’t let him touch her, bring her to orgasm. She couldn’t let go that much tonight.

She pulled herself together quickly and washed up before she left the bathroom. Jude was still stretched out in a sated sprawl.

She thought he’d actually gone to sleep already, but when she climbed under the covers, he drew her over against him. Kissedher hair a few times with groggy sweetness and said, “Thank you, angel.”

She gulped at the endearment. “You already thanked me.”

“I mean for everything. For… everything. I feel so much better tonight.”

“Good. I’m glad.” She stroked his chest and stayed nestled at his side until his breathing deepened and his body softened even more.

When she was sure he was asleep, she gently withdrew from him, having to try three times because he kept trying to pull her back against him in his sleep. But she finally got away.

She slept on her own side of the bed, facing away from him.

And it felt terrible. Terrible. Like she was all alone in the world.

But she would be alone soon enough, and it was better to break herself a little bit now than to be completely shattered when he died.

The following day, Eve texted a couple of friends from high school who still lived in Green Valley to see if they wanted to get together that evening for dinner and/or drinks. She was still worried about her current emotional state and was hoping for a little extra distance from Jude.

At least for a couple more days.

They were leaving for Egypt on Wednesday, so there would be no hope for distance then.

Both her friends were still single and had no plans for a random Monday night in May, and they immediately accepted her invitation. So she filled the main part of the day with errandsand lunch with her father and then went to dinner with her friends.

Jude did some work revising his book in the morning and rested in the afternoon. At Eve’s suggestion, he arranged to have dinner with his father that evening.

So he was fine. He didn’t need her today. The two of them didn’t have to be joined at the hip every single day. She was allowed some time on her own to pull herself together and regain a healthy perspective on her marriage.

Jude didn’t complain and didn’t question her prolonged absence, but he kept checking in by text to see how she was doing and how things were progressing, as if he was thinking about her throughout the day.

She felt kind of restless and anxious—like she wasn’t where she was supposed to be—but she managed to fill the hours. And she actually had a good time at dinner with her old friends aside from the fact that she had to act thrilled about her spontaneous marriage instead of telling them the truth about its short duration.

After dinner they went to Mill House, one of the popular bars in town. Her friends had several drinks there, but Eve stuck to sparkling water. While she was tempted to overindulge tonight in the hopes of clouding reality, she simply wasn’t a heavy drinker. She didn’t like to feel out of control or like she might make a fool of herself, and she definitely didn’t want Jude to see her like that.

It was almost midnight when she drove her friends back to their places and made sure they got inside okay. After they were both safe at home, she got back into her car, locking the doors and turning on the engine. She texted Jude that she was on her way back.

He’d checked in a couple of hours ago to let her know he was going to bed, but he’d wanted her to send him a message when she was on her way back home.

About fifteen seconds after she sent him the text, her phone rang through the speakers of her car. Jude’s name displayed on the screen, so she connected the call. “Hey! I thought you were asleep.”

“I couldn’t go to sleep, so I’ve been reading.” His voice was warm. Slightly husky. Familiar. It filled the inside of her car. “How did everything go with your friends tonight?”

“Pretty good. We had fun. They drank too much.”

“But you didn’t? You’re okay to drive home?”