Page 4 of Bean
A smaller mortgage than before, yes, but a mortgage all the same.Not to mention all the renovation bills for the new place. I’d sold our house and bought a shitty little fixer-upper on Great Highway, a block from La Playa. It was an old attachedforeclosure that had been sitting abandoned for years.The junk company I’d hired had just finished gutting the place, and now my brother’s company was getting ready to make the place like new again.
It was the start of my new life.Right?I mean, it had to be.Otherwise, what was the point of burning it all to the ground?
Leaving the divorce papers on the seat, I climbed out of the car and slammed the door shut. Glancing down, I noticed a very visible scuff on my shoe and, just above that, a stain on the shin of my trousers.
Jesus, I was amess.But I had no time to worry about it.I needed to get back to my desk.At the very least, work might be able to distract me from the hurricane of frustration and sadness swirling in my chest.
My short, thick heels clicked loudly on the concrete as I made my way inside, staring at the title on the door:Hemmings and Browne Finance. The door was halfway open from the blowing A/C, so I didn’t need to swipe in, but as I passed by the front desk and tapped my badge against the black box that would unlock the elevators, it turned red.
“Uh.” I turned to face the guy at the desk. He looked young—like a USFCA student intern—and he was giving me an odd look. “Can you swipe me in?”
He swallowed thickly as he stared at his computer. “Sorry, Mr. Conti?—”
“It’s Soroka now,” I corrected swiftly. I couldn’t stand to hear Gio’s last name attached to me anymore, even if I hadn’t been down to the social security office to change it yet.
“Sorry, Mr. Soroka,” he said with a frown, glancing at the computer like he was double-checking whether or not he missed something. “Can you hang on a moment? Someone’s coming down.”
Part of me wanted to argue with him to just let me up. Another part of me didn’t care. The idea of sitting at my desk and pretending everything was hunky-dory after what I’d been through that morning made me feel like I was trying to swallow a boulder.
I should have just taken the damn day off. I could have called Ivy and had her meet me at the Wharf. We could eat bread bowls of clam chowder and watch street performers. I think the old sports shop was still there too, the place I’d gotten my first and only basketball poster.
Jordan, Rodman, and Pippen. My dad had been thrilled. He’d thought I was getting into sports. He had no idea how many hours I’d spent under my sheets rubbing myself raw to those biceps. I never did tell him.
Okay, yeah, this was getting weird. Why was I thinking about my teenage fantasies right now? Maybe I needed to get laid. I was divorced now, after all. I’d been emotionally freed from Gio fifteen months ago, and one hour ago, I’d been freed by the law.
“Mr. Conti?”
I winced and turned, expecting to see one of the polo shirts from IT. Instead, it was two men from security. My face turned hot. I knew what this meant. I’d been working here far too long not to. Company policy when a person got fired was to have them escorted out.
“What did I do?” The words tumbled from my lips, trembling softly. “What did I do?”
“I’m sorry, Mr. Conti,” the taller one said. “Please come quietly.”
I opened my mouth and a laugh escaped. It was high, tight, halfway to hysterical. He set a hand on my arm, and I jolted, pulling away from him. “Please don’t touch me.”
“I don’t have a choice.” He grabbed me again, and I felt something rising in me. Panic. Shock. Rage?
God, I was about to lose it.
“Jarek!”
My head whipped to the side, and I saw Tanya, my boss, hurrying toward me. Her heels clicked loudly on the tiles and she looked mortified. “What did I do?” I repeated.
She stared at the two men. “Let me take him.”
“Sorry, Ms. Browne, but we can’t.” His grip on me tightened, and suddenly, the world went blurry.
Oh fuck, were thosetears? I couldnotcry in front of these people. I could not lose it in front of these total strangers.
Tanya looked devastated. “Take my hand,” she whispered.
I did, almost like I didn’t have a choice. Her fingers were like ice, which oddly kept me grounded. She walked next to me, keeping close enough that I almost forgot I was being escorted out. The security officers let go the moment the door to the parking garage opened.
Why did it feel like I was just here? Oh, right, because I was. “There’s my car,” I said foolishly.
“I know.” Tanya didn’t let me go, even as the officer did. “I have Scott gathering your stuff from your desk, okay? You didn’t do anything wrong, Jarek. They told us about cuts today. They didn’t want us to warn any of you.”
I laughed, though it sounded suspiciously like a sob. I swiped at my face and was horrified to find my hands were shaking. “Listen, I’m fine, okay? I’ve got this. I’m just gonna go.” I pulled out my keys, and she put her hand on my wrist.