Page 49 of Bean
Spending the night at Jarek’s.
His reply was instant, which told me he’d been waiting for me to text.
Have fun and be safe. Don’t forget to take your meds.
Classic Nash to be worried about that, though not without reason. Because of my crappy memory, I relied on routines, and staying with Jarek was definitely not a part of my usual routine.
I counted out my meds, then checked them off in my meds tracker. My whole life was caught up in lists, but if that was what I needed to function, then I’d make all the lists and check them all off one by one. And I never went anywhere without my backpack, which always had my meds in it.
Preparing for bed in someone else’s house was a whole new experience. Jarek had a toothbrush for me, so we brushed our teeth together, standing side by side in his small bathroom. It somehow felt intimate, maybe even more than, say, kissing, though I couldn’t explain why.
When he padded over to the toilet to pee, I rushed out, and his chuckle followed me. “It’s nothing you haven’t seen before!” he called after me.
If my cheeks were as red as they felt, I had to be close to crimson. Cardinal red, like the birds in my parents’ backyard.
“I didn’t mean to embarrass you,” Jarek said when he stepped back into the bedroom. “I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable.”
“You didn’t. I mean, I was, but that wasn’t on you. I still struggle with…” I made a vague gesture, then sighed. “Basically everything having to do with sex or even being naked.”
“I take it your religious upbringing is the reason for that?”
“Yeah. Isn’t it funny how so many years later, I still need to break free from those patterns?”
Jarek slid under the covers, then held them open for me, and with relief, I snuggled close to him. His duvet was wonderfully light and fluffy and not too warm. He wrapped his arm around me and gently tugged until I put my head on his shoulder.
“In some aspects, it’s more conditioning than upbringing, I think.”
I let that sink in. “You’re not wrong. I have a strong visceral reaction to doing or saying something I wasn’t allowed to as a child. Like I can feel the pain associated with it.”
“Exactly.” He kissed the top of my head. “I like having you in my bed.”
It was a blatant change of subject, but I suspected he’d done it for me, and my chest filled with warmth. Jarek was so kind, so soft inside. I’d gotten lucky with him. “I like being in your bed.”
We snuggled for a while, and my blinks became longer and slower. The last thing I remembered was him holding me tight and whispering, “Sleep well, sunshine.”
I slept like the dead. When I woke up, Jarek was still beside me, quietly reading on his Kindle. “Morning, gorgeous. Did you sleep well?”
I stretched, yawning. “Like a baby. What time is it?”
“Eight. Do you need to be anywhere?”
“Not until two. I have a late shift today.”
“Good. Then I can make you breakfast.”
He leaned in for a kiss. I hesitated for a moment because, hello, morning breath, but then gave in. If he didn’t care, neither would I. The first touch was gentle, tender, but when our tongues met, I let out a little moan. Jarek’s Kindle dropped from his hand and he rolled on top of me. Being pinned down by a man was a sensation I still wasn’t used to, and on some level, I hoped I never would be.
“Mmm, you taste so good, sweet thing. Addictive,” he whispered before surging into my mouth again.
I closed my eyes and let him sweep me away, clinging to his biceps like a life raft. Kissing this man was…phenomenal. Amazing. Everything I never thought kissing could be like.
It didn’t even register with me that my morning wood had hardened and I was rubbing myself against him until he looked at me with darkened eyes and a sexy little smile. “Wanna practice frotting some more?”
Did he really think I’d say no to that?
It didn’t take long this time, and we came simultaneously, our happy moans mingling. “Why don’t you go take a shower and I’ll make breakfast,” Jarek said, and I nodded. “There’s towels and washcloths in the cupboard under the sink in the bathroom.”
When I came back down after a quick shower—I still wasn’t used to being able to take my time showering—Jarek was in the kitchen, making an…