Page 63 of The Midnight King
“The Fae have a different code of morality than humans do. That doesn’t excuse what he did, but perhaps it can help you understand. I myself have done countless terrible things, especially in my youth.”
I stare at him. “You look about twenty-five. How old are you?”
He smiles, and I notice with shock that every one of his teeth are sharply pointed. “Never mind my age. I want you to know that despite his mistakes, Killian is the kindest soul I’ve ever known—even gentler than his mother. His compassion drives him to serve humans in need, and it prompted him to take a vow, decades ago, that he would never kill a human being.”
“He told me about that, too,” I say.
“I’m not asking you to forgive him or excuse what he did,” Finias continues. “I simply want you to understand the better part of his character. And I apologize, as his father, for the pain he caused you.”
“Your apology is appreciated, but unnecessary,” I assure him. “As for Killian—I think I forgave him that very same night, to be honest. Whatever wrong he did me, he has more than paid for it by risking his own life to set me free and to spare the Prince.”
“Ah yes, the Prince. Your husband.” Finias raises an eyebrow significantly.
“Perhaps not for long. There is a practice called annulment in my kingdom.” I bite my lip, afraid I’ve gone too far and revealed too much of what I really want. The things I love have always been taken away from me. But Gilda isn’t here to destroy them anymore. Perhaps I’m allowed to have hope, to experience love. To plan for a future.
“I should go to him,” I say.
“By all means.” But as I turn to leave, Finias says, “He’s right, you know. Clara likes you. And so do I. Perhaps we are drawn to other wounded souls who have endured great torment and emerged stronger for it.”
He saves me from having to reply by sauntering off down the hall. I watch him go, wondering what torment a Faerie like him might have suffered. I suppose I always thought of Faeries as powerful beings who didn’t have to fear harm because they had magic. But that assumption has been proved wrong more than once lately.
I return to the room where Killian lies on the bed, watching half a dozen floating orbs of light drifting in slow circles against the ceiling. His purple hair is still damp from the sweat of his agony, and his skin is far whiter than usual.
I hold one of the red candies near his lips. “Open.”
He lifts his head, takes the candy in his teeth, and chews it slowly.
“Hell of an introduction to my parents,” he mutters. “At least my sister wasn’t here. Things would have been much louder and more frantic.”
He’s talking so casually about the situation, and yet his leg is fuckinggone. I take his face in my hands, overwhelmed by a sudden, panicked anger. “Do you realize you almostdied?”
“I’m quite aware of the fact. I figured it was likely, and I was prepared for it.”
“ButIwasn’t!” I exclaim. “Killian, how would your parents have felt about that? About you dying for some human girl you barely know?”
“Some human girl?” His gaze turns fiery. “You think that’s all you are to me?” He drags himself up to a sitting position against the headboard. “Fuck that, Celinda. You know better.”
“What exactly do you think I know?” My stomach is shivery with anticipation, my heart rate higher than ever. I feel as if I’m standing on the edge of a cliff with the wind blowing wildly, threatening to knock me off the brink into freefall. And Iwantthe dizzying drop, the terrifying thrill of the descent.
Killian reaches for my hand and curls his long fingers around mine. “You are my madness,” he says quietly. “I fucking lost my mind over you. That’s not your fault, I know. But when I lost my mind, I lost my heart, too. I would die for you, Sin—I wouldkillfor you if I had to. I understand that you hate me for lying to you, and I can live with that, as long as I know that you’re free.”
“But I’m not free,” I whisper. “I’m married to the Prince, and the King is dead. When I go back, I will have to wake Brantley and tell him his father is gone. I don’t know how to do that, Killian. He’ll be heartbroken. And then… I want the marriage annulled, but I can’t do that to him. I’ll have to stay with him, to comfort him…”
“I think he might seek comfort from someone else,” says Killian with a wry smile. “The Prince has recently realized a few things about himself. He will grieve for his father, yes, but I don’t think he will grieve the marriage.”
“His bodyguard,” I say. “He’s in love with his best friend, isn’t he? And despite being so brilliant, he never saw the signs until now.”
“Precisely.” A faint smile crosses Killian’s lips before he frowns again. “And don’t talk as if you’re going back alone. I’m returning with you, though I won’t be able to glamour myself asthe King again. I’ve already placed his body in his bed, and the servants will find him there in the morning. He’s been preserved by magic, so the death will seem recent. They’ll think his heart failed while he slept. But I can take on an alternate glamour and remain nearby. I’ll stay as long as you need me.”
I swallow hard, rubbing my fingers over his. “Then you might be staying a long time.”
He goes very still. “How long?”
“Only until I die.”
“Is that so?”
“I have conditions, of course.”