Page 19 of Fate

“What are we going to do?” Firen asked at last. The first hurdle, for any new couple.

Other mates surely did not hear quite that same sigh, however. Didn’t feel the lump of disquiet settle so firmly.

“For tonight? Or for later?”

Either. Both.

“I wish you would come home with me,” she said at last. “If... if things are to be as bad as you think they will, perhaps it would be better to have a welcome to hold on to.” She tucked her arm about his, hugging it to her. He was stiff beside her, but the bond hummed pleasantly, so he must not find it too disagreeable.

“But if you would rather wait...” She felt the weight of that and wondered if her parents might worry. Or if... if they would know. When she did not come back until the morning. If they would rightly assume that she was otherwise occupied.

She bit her lip, wishing it was from the burst of mutual warmth of wanting and... well... the joining that would come after.

“Might I see your room? If we are to stay here?”

He shifted, and she could feel his eyes narrowing, although she did not turn her head to look. “Why?”

She did not let his tone dissuade her. “Because. I’d like to know more about you. And presumably there are belongings to be seen there.” Her head tilted slightly, and she did glance at him then. “Or did you pack your trunk like you were meant to?” He looked away from her, his shoulders tenser than they’d been before. “I’m not cross,” she soothed. “I stopped doing it a long time ago.” But she’d done it that morning. Convinced herself that it wouldn’t actually happen. Not on her first attempt at seeking him out for herself. But... better prepared, Mama said.

And she’d been right. As usual.

“I don’t...” He shifted, his head ducking to stare down at the floor.

She squinted.

No. Glare down at the floor.

“I cannot recall the last time anyone else was in there.”

Firen blinked, not quite able to comprehend that. Perhaps Da had become a bit more reserved in entering her chamber as she’d grown. But there was always a sibling pushing in. Mama with a query or a reminder.

Always someone.

“Oh.” She tried to reorient herself. To know if she should press or to retreat. But they would need to sleep somewhere for the night. Together, surely? Or did he expect her simply to... go?

She shifted again, eyeing him more carefully. “Do you wish me to go home?” she asked, trying not to let her voice waver. Trying to be understanding even... even as her throat tightened and her heart raced. And not in the pleasant way it had when he’d kissed her and she’d pulled him close. “Alone?”

She hated the thought of it. Despised it with every bit of herself. But... maybe that’s what he needed. To prepare his room and his thoughts. His family too, if that’s what was required.

He was not a fantasy. This was her mate, and his needs mattered, even if she could not share in them.

He snorted softly and shook his head. “If I’d wanted that, I’d have let you fly out the window.”

Her shoulders relaxed.

Her throat too.

“Good.” She took his hand again. “But I don’t think we should stay here. Not if it’s meant for somebody else.” She could not imagine how cross her mother would be if they messed a room that had already been cleaned for another’s use. That was not how she wished things to begin with Lucian’s parents, especially if they would already be tense.

He sighed and stood. “I suppose.”

He sounded resigned, but not entirely pleased at the prospect of moving. “My room,” he muttered to himself, and she nodded.

“I won’t be too nosey. I promise.” It was the first vow she’d given to him, and it was the one that she already knew would be the hardest to keep. But she’d said it, and she’d meant it, so whatever she saw in his chamber, she’d... try. To not be too great a bother. And if he was anything like her brothers in their earlier days, she’d try not to judge too harshly if his room was untidy without a mother to remind them they’d have mates one day who wouldnottolerate a slovenly bond-mate.

He muttered something else, but it was too low for her to hear.

She didn’t know if he’d insist on breaking through the shutter and window from the outside, but was almost relieved when he crossed to the main door of the room. The hinges were well-oiled, and it swung inward, and there was suddenly a great deal more light than there had been before.