Page 11 of Never Enough
I’ve only just started to relax when the front door slams against the wall with such force that I jump. Alex and Celeste tumble in, a blur of limbs entwined with their lips locked. Alexandru’s presses Celeste to the cool plaster, his hands roaming without restraint, while she claws at him, a needy whimper escaping her throat.
“Alex,” she breathes out his name in a plea for more. It’s one I silently say to myself too.
Just when I thought my day couldn’t get any worse. Looks like Celeste is about to fulfill her promise. She’s going to fuck Alex right in front of me.
Kill me.
I can’t tear my eyes away, even through the sting. The sharp twist of longing and hurt is a physical thing, clawing its way up from my stomach to lodge itself firmly in my throat. Alexandru, the boy who occupies my every waking thought, is displaying an intimacyso intense with Celeste, the girl who refuses to spare me a kind word to save her life.
“Must be tough,” Victoria says, her voice cutting through the haze of my pain. She leans in close, her breath hot on my ear. “Watching the man you pine over devour someone else.”
“Shut up,” I utter, my voice barely audible. My cheeks flame with embarrassment, but I’m powerless to stop the flush that betrays my inner turmoil.
“Aww, did I hit a nerve?” Victoria mocks, a cruel smirk playing on her lips. “You really thought you had a chance with him?”
I want to scream, to lash out, to make her feel even a fraction of the hurt that’s slicing through me. But all I do is glance away and avoid, because what’s the point? Celeste giggles, high-pitched and oblivious, as Alexandru kisses down her neck, his hands venturing beneath her shirt with a boldness that wrenches my heart.
“Pathetic, really,” Victoria continues, relentless. “Did you think he’d ever look your way? With her around?”
“No,” I admit. There’d be no point in competing.
I should move, but my body refuses to obey. Instead, I’m rooted to the spot with a mixture of anguish and an unwilling fascination. The sounds of their kisses, the soft moans, are an auditory assault. Each noise is a lash against my already fraying composure.
With each passing second, the air grows thicker. My anxiety is through the roof. All I can do is clutch the cushion beside me, knuckles white, as I force myself to watch them through self-deprecation. I’ll die on this couch.
Victoria leaves me with a parting shot as she turns away. “Checkmate.”
I swallow hard, blinking rapidly to clear my vision. It’s pointless to wish for the unattainable, yet here I am, wishing still. I realize that, sometimes, there’s no greater agony than a love that can never be reciprocated.
Then, giving me mercy, Alex stops. His vision darkens, and he removes his lips from Celeste’s body. Meanwhile, Celeste, as any woman would right now, huffs in annoyance.
Victoria groans. “Don’t tell me you’re stopping because of Daphne’s puppy-dog eyes.”
At the mention of my name, his eyes find me. And then I hear him clear his throat—an awkward, strangled sound that seems to echo painfully off the walls.
I don’t think he knew I was here, watching.
He peels himself away from Celeste, who clings to him like a second skin, her eyes heavy with desire. Very quickly, though, she composes herself and chimes in. “Must be uncomfortable for you, Alex,” Celeste says with a voice as smooth as silk and twice assuffocating. “Having her constantly nearby and watching you with those needy things she calls eyes.”
Guilt paints Alex’s face, a shadow that seems to envelope him. His gaze remains downcast, avoiding mine as if the sight of my pain might shatter the illusion he’s built around himself. His hands are trembling slightly, and whether it’s from the adrenaline, their heated encounter, or the discomfort of this confrontation, I can’t tell.
Nor does it matter.
“Let’s go to my room,” Celeste coos, her fingers encircling Alexandru’s wrist, tugging insistently. “We need some privacy, away from jealous eyes.”
He allows himself to be pulled along, taking my shattered heart with him. He casts a fleeting glance in my direction, a look so quick I might have imagined it, but even that is enough to send shards of ice through my veins.
I’m going crazy thinking that, deep down, he has feelings for me like I do for him.
As they disappear down the hallway, the door to Celeste’sbedroom closes with a click.
The tears come unbidden, hot and relentless. They carve tracks down my cheeks, each one a testament to the love I can never express, the touch I can never feel. I press my palms against my eyes, willing the world away, wishing I could melt into the cushions and become as inconsequential as I perceive myself to be. Why can’t I stop loving him?
As the sounds of Celeste’s giggles filter through the walls, accompanied by the low murmur of Alex’s voice, I realize that some wounds cut too deep.
I curl tighter on the couch, pulling my knees to my chest as if I can somehow shield myself from the reality that unfolds feet away. I’m lost in my thoughts when a key turns in the front door lock.
Thank God. At this point, I’d welcome just about any company.