Page 50 of This Christmas
We’re quiet for a long moment, the television giving off some background noise. The lights from the screen flicker until he turns it off.
“I’m never going to forgive myself for falling into that trap.”
“That’s okay. I’ll forgive you.”
EIGHTEEN
ZANE
We are officially a week away from Christmas and this is the happiest I’ve been in over five years. It’s all because of my dad and Evangeline. After a long talk with her about my dad’s store, I came up with a plan to help him revitalize the store without violating the historic value. Eve said preservation was key. The best part, I have the funds to cover everything, thanks to living rent free, which I’ve come to agree with Evangeline on—Bamford primed me for his daughter. It’s sick and twisted, but sadly there isn’t anything I can do about it. I benefited financially from the arrangement by not having to pay any bills. Now, with my salary banked, it’s allowing me to help my dad.
There’s been a positive shift with Evangeline as well. Ever since my sleepover, I’ve been there every night. Things between us are moving at the pace she set, even though the last couple of nights we’ve beendoing a lot of things over our clothes that are driving me nuts.
We’re relearning each other’s habits, our likes and dislikes, and how to be together without her wondering if I’m going to bail. It’s going to take time for her to build trust in me again, and I’m okay with it. I’ll wait for everything until she’s ready.
If she calls, I’m there. I have every alert set on my phone for her number. I’m unwilling to miss any moment with her.
I’ve asked her for a job. It’s better than opening my own practice and taking business away from what she’s established in town. I don’t mind working for her. In fact, I think it’s a bit exciting and scandalous to have a love affair with my boss. The bonus is when—and if—the mood strikes, we can go upstairs to her apartment. But I also see us taking a day off together, staying in, or working from home. Despite the lack of walls, the set-up is perfect for when we need to work from home.
It's amazing how a week ago, my home was at my dad’s, and now when I say home, I mean Evangeline’s. I never knewthisfour-letter word held so much power. Back in college, Eve and I would only spend a night together, usually on Saturday. We thought it would be easier on our roommates. We’d always planned to move in with each other in our last semester, and then I completely messed things up for us.
There will be no messing up this time. Evangeline and my dad are my priorities. They should’ve been this entire time.
I drive out of town, which in the grand scheme of things is less than ten miles in any which direction, and head to an appointment with Benny Holcomb. He has accepted my apology, even though I continue to tell him repeatedly how sorry I am. He doesn’t have to forgive me, but he has. But I also thank him for being there for my dad.
With my turn signal on, I wait for a gap in the line of traffic heading toward Deer Ridge, and turn, pulling into the first parking spot, which is next to Benny’s truck. Inside the diner, I tell the gentleman at the host stand that I’m meeting someone and walk toward the windows facing the highway where Benny sits.
“Zane,” he says with a nod as I sit down. I set a folder on the table and order a soda from the waitress after she hands me the menu.
“Thanks for meeting me.”
“Your request sounded ominous. I figured if you were asking for Evangeline’s hand in marriage, you would’ve done it at the house.”
The thought of marrying Evangeline brings pure joy to my heart, but also pain and longing. We’ve lost so much time, and we are nowhere near where we need to be when it comes to marriage. For all I know, she doesn’t want to get married. To me or anyone. You better believe I’d marry her tomorrow without reservation, but it’s not up to me.
“I think if I were to ask Eve, she’d kick me off the roof of the firehouse.”
Bennylaughs. “She would.”
“With good measure,” I add. “I have a lot to prove, but I’ll do it.”
“That’s good to hear. So, now tell me. Why are we here and not in town?”
I clear my throat and pick the folder up. “Evangeline mentioned you are thinking about retiring.”
“We are.” Benny laughs lightly. “We’re tired.”
“I get it. Even working in the season, I’m exhausted.” I hold my hand up to let him know I’m not done. “But as exhausting as it is, Evangeline loves the farm. For as long as I’ve known her, it’s been her happiest times, even after Robert died.” I pause when Benny looks down at the table.
Robert, four years older than Evangeline, died during his senior year of high school when the ATV he was riding crashed into a tree. He hadn’t been wearing his helmet. His death devastated the town, and then a month later, my mom passed away from a heart attack. Eve and I bonded over our losses and never left each other’s sides.
“I know words can sound hollow or seem meaningless, especially coming from me right now. Please trust me when I say I love Evangeline. I never stopped when I lost my way. Deep down, I think I knew I’d always come back to her and hate that it’s taken me so long.
“With that said, I’d like to buy the farm,” I tell him as his eyes widen. “It will be a gift to Evangeline. From me. I can promise you we’d preserve the essence of what you’ve built for Reindeer Ridge. You and Clara can stay in the house, free of charge.”
“How would youafford it?”
“I have a healthy savings and I’m using it to do things that’ll make me, Eve, and my dad happy. If you sell the farm, I know she’ll be heartbroken. She loves how it’s tied to our community. It’s important to her. It’s important to me. I saw what the trees you gave my dad did for the store. He needs that. And if you sell, there’s no way to know if the farm will stay or if the potential new owners would want to be involved.