Page 147 of The Ranger

Mama gaped at her. “You did what?!”

“I told him to leave, Mama. He said a lot of strange things and even if I do believe some of it, he…” she couldn’t finish. Her heart was not only empty, but breaking. She was a means to an end, and she didn’t want that. She wanted love, lots of it.

Mama put her arm around her. “Maida, whatever he told you, no matter how strange, I believe it’s true.”

She stared at her mother, her heart in her throat. The ache was increasing, and she knew what was coming. “I sent him away…”

Grandma Sadie came into the room, took one look at her, and sat on her other side. She was now sandwiched between the two women. “Excuse?” Grandma Sadie said.

“She told Markhel to leave,” Mama said.

“Maida, you did what?!”

She looked at her grandmother. “At least Pa will be happy.”

Grandma buried her face in her hands. “Oh, land sakes, what have we done?” She looked at Maida as her shoulders slumped. “We’re sorry, dear. We didn’t understand certain things.”

Maida shook her head. “Doesn’t matter. He wants to court me…, well, never mind.” She left the bed. “I should put my nightgown on. It’s been a long day.”

“You’re turning in?” Mama asked with a worried glance at Grandma.

“Yes. I’m tired. Please, I want to be alone.” Maida went to her dresser and pulled out her nightgown.

Mama and Grandma Sadie watched her with sad expressions. And… was that regret in their eyes?

“Maida,” Grandma said. “You look more than a little tired. But I’m sure a good night’s rest will help.”

Maida stood, took a deep breath, then looked at Grandma. She then headed for the door, an obvious invitation to follow.

Grandma took it and, after giving Maida a kiss goodnight on the cheek, left the bedroom.

Maida closed the door behind her and changed into her nightgown. That done, she braided her hair and gazed out the window. The emptiness in her heart was different, and she wasn’t sure why.

She crawled into bed and stared at the ceiling. An odd sort of numbness engulfed her, and she didn’t know what to make of it. Had she brought it on by telling Markhel to leave? But how could that be?

She didn’t want to think about it, she didn’t want to think about anything. Markhel had told her things that at first sounded wonderful and adventurous. But now that she’d had time to think about what he told her, the more he sounded like a lunatic. Pa was right, she shouldn’t have let herself get too close to him. Markhel was dangerous, and not the sort of man she should be getting sweet on. But she had, and she wondered if it was too late? Would she suffer a broken heart? Hadn’t she a little already?

But she could stop this now, take a step back and think. Markhel was handsome beyond measure. Strong, and, she thought, safe. But he wasn’t safe anymore. He, if he was indeed what he claimed, might not be capable of love. Considering what they’d been through since his return to Clear Creek, shouldn’t he at least have some feelings for her? Or had he been using her to pass the time?

The more she thought about it the more it hurt. Within days she’d become more than a little infatuated with him. She’d lost part of her heart. What a fool.

She decided to speak to Pa in the morning and see what he thought. For some reason he kept changing his mind and letting Markhel spend time with her. But again, if Markhel was telling the truth, however bizarre it was, wouldn’t Pa have told him to stay as far away from the ranch as possible? Yet, Markhel was sitting in her room earlier this afternoon, watching over her while she slept. And for crying out loud, the family saw them sparking in the hall?

She shut her eyes tight, trying to remember. There were fragments of memory. Markhel holding her, pain, his beautiful face…

She struck the bed in frustration. “This wasn’t supposed to happen. He was supposed to be normal!”

But he wasn’t. He was, in fact, far from it. And her family knew it. Some of them, at least. She had a feeling Duncan didn’t have a clue as to what was going on.

She closed her eyes and tried to sleep, but sleep wouldn’t come. She sat up, looked out the window, and wondered if she went to it, if she’d see Markhel below in the barnyard. Part of her wanted him to be there. The other part didn’t want to see him again.

She let herself fall back onto her pillows. The dance was fast approaching and there was work to be done decorating the barn. She’d concentrate on that and try not to think about Markhel. If she asked, Pa would make sure he didn’t bother her. So would Grandpa.

She thought of Grandma Waller. She knew Markhel the best. Maybe she should pay her another visit, ask a few questions. If Markhel really was what he said, then did Grandma Waller know?

Maida’s mind raced over her time spent with him (only because she couldn’t get him out of her head!) and recalled a strange conversation she’d had with him. Had they talked at all? She must have dreamed it. They were speaking, but not speaking. As if they were able to read each other’s thoughts.

“I’m going to wind up going round the bend if I’m not careful.”