Page 166 of Broken Saint

The thought of eating anything makes my stomach turn over.

“You sure?” Luca asks.

“Yes. We’ll call if anything happens.”

With concerned expressions on their faces, the four of them leave, plunging the room into silence.

“This wasn’t how it was supposed to be,” I whisper.

“It’s just a bump in the road. Everything will work out,” Macie says.

I look up at all three of them, desperate to feel just a hint of their positivity, but I get nothing.

Everything is dark and hopeless.

The guys are gone for ages. It doesn’t matter to me, but the girls are starting to get hungry.

When they eventually crash back through the room with arms full of food, they look stressed. Even more so than when they left.

“What’s wrong?” Macie asks.

“It’s chaos down there,” Kane explains, passing Letty a premade sub and some chips.

“Everyone sends their love and best wishes,” Luca says.

I’m sure their words should make me feel better, but they don’t. Instead, the knowledge that the entire world is watching right now makes me want to curl in on myself and hide.

This is hard enough to deal with as it is. I don’t need eyes on me. On us.

“We weren’t sure what you wanted,” Brax says, stepping up to me with a whole variety of food options.

I shake my head, unable to even look at it all without feeling sick.

“I’m not hungry,” I mutter.

“El, you need to eat something,” Letty says, her maternal instincts kicking in. “You need to keep your strength up.”

She’s right. I know she’s right. But it isn’t enough to convince me.

Shaking my head again, I slowly push to my feet. “I need the bathroom,” I explain before walking out of the room.

“Wait, I’ll come,” Peyton offers.

“No,” I snap a little harsher than I intended. “I…I just need a moment.”

Without giving them a chance to argue with me, I take off on unsteady legs in the direction of the bathroom.

43

ELLA

Much to my surprise, everyone leaves me alone in the bathroom for quite a while. I guess they’re too distracted with food.

Eventually, though, my peace is disturbed when Letty comes in search of me.

I hate how she finds me, curled up on the floor of one of the cubicles, but it is what it is. I’ve got bigger issues right now.

It takes a while, but eventually, she convinces me to go back.