Page 4 of Broken Saint
“Why haven’t you left his sorry ass yet, El? You can do so much better than him.”
“Not at the table, please. We’re having a nice family meal.”
“So what about you then, Benny? No girl to bring home to meet us this weekend?” I tease.
My little brother is currently living the life I’m trying desperately not to obsess over. He’s a Titan at Trinity Royal College in South Carolina, and he’s loving every second of the attention, the girls, and the parties. Despite the fact the season has already kicked off, he doesn’t seem to be slowing down. Ah, to be young and stupid again.
“Can’t say I’ve spent time with any girls Mom would approve of.”
“Benny,” Mom growls, placing a bowl of potatoes in the middle of the table. “I brought you up to have more respect for women than that, boy.”
“Don’t worry; I respect the hell out of them.” His smirk grows, the twinkle in his eye bright enough to blind me.
“Oh, so you let them come first. How thoughtful of you,” I deadpan, much to Mom’s horror.
She mutters something under her breath as she shuffles back to the kitchen. I’m pretty sure it has something to do with us both going to hell.
Mom was brought up in a very conservative family, and while Dad might have helped her break through the red tape that she’d been bound up in all her life, that quiet little girl with more morals than desires still sometimes breaks through.
It’s one of the things I miss most about having Dad around. He stopped her from falling back into old habits ingrained in her by her parents and grandparents.
“Always,” Benny states proudly with a shit-eating grin on his face.
Something inside me knots up, witnessing his arrogance. When I look at him, I don’t see my little brother, but a man I should have forgotten about years ago.
Memories of the time I spent with him at Maddison roll through my mind like a movie, each one squeezing my heart tighter than the last.
The big game is this weekend.
The Saints vs the Chiefs in Seattle.
All our guys back together, facing off on the field.
I should?—
“Ella. Ella. Ella?”
I blink at Benny, his concerned face blurred as I fight to get control of myself.
My fingers cramp where I’m holding the seat of the chair so tightly, my nails bending against the hard wood beneath.
“S-sorry, excuse me.” Pushing up, I rush toward the bathroom at the back of my parents’ small house.
“Ella?” he calls again as I kick the door closed behind me.
I stand at the sink with my hands curled around the edges as those memories keep coming.
“Don’t get any ideas about this, Bombshell,” he groans in my ear. “It’s just one night, remember? That’s all I can offer.”Despite him being miles away, living his best life right now, I hear his voice in my ear as if he’s standing right behind me. My blood heats in a way I barely remember is possible, and my skin erupts in goosebumps.
“One night is all I need,”I remember replying. And wasn’t that the damn truth.
One night was all I needed to become obsessed with a man who was totally unavailable.
He’d given me all the warnings, told me repeatedly what to expect from him, but I was powerless to protect my heart.
He offered me the out and gave me the option more than once to run in the opposite direction.
Do I regret not taking it?