Page 9 of Burned & Bound
“Fuck. It wasn’t Daisy, was it?” I had a favorite cow. Couldn’t fucking help it. Daisy was more dog than cow at this point, but I was fond of my girl. Most of my lunches on the ranch were spent cuddling that cow—not that I had a choice. That girl was the definition of forcing cuddling on anyone.
“That heifer?” He chuckled. “Nothin’s goin’ to kill that girl. Nah, these two were older, but I got the boys quarantinin’ that portion of the herd.”
Fuck, I wasn’t sure we could keep segmenting the herd. As was, we had the fields divided up way more than I was comfortable with using makeshift fences. It was the best thing I could do to try containing the virus that kept killing my goddamncows.
“Another thing,” I continued, trying to sort my thoughts.Fuck, this whole West situation had me riled up and all over the place.“I don’t give a fuck why he’s here or that half of this is his family’s land, I don’t want West knowing any of the inside shit you know. Or anyone else. No one fucking talks to him. If he has questions about how my fucking business is going, he can ask me. I’ll set him straight on where he fucking belongs.”
“And where’s that?”
“Gone. That’s where. He did it once, he can do it again.” I knew how I sounded, but I didn’t fucking care. I didn’t need West popping in for a year and fucking everything up. I had enough troubles without his help.
“Now, you ain’t got a clue what sent that boy packin’,” Mickey said quietly.
“Oh, I know.”Me.While Harrison had never quite come out to say it, I had a feeling he found out what happened in that field that night between West and me. And Harrison had been real upfront about West’s upset state of mind—ranting about this couldn’t be his life and all that shit and how he was off to find something better.Someone better.The implication was real fucking hard to miss.
The worst part was that I’d fallen for West’s shit in the field. Hell, that night all but confirmed what I’d been thinking about for the better part of a few years: I knew I loved West, but was I gay?
On top of that mess, I hadn’t expected shit from West. He could’ve told me it was a mistake, and I would’ve recovered just fine. Hurt? Sure. But I was built tough. He didn’t have to run away and never say a goddamn word to me again.
And so if West wanted to find someone better and leave me then fuck him. Karma was a force of fucking nature, and it sounded like she’d handed him his ass more than a few times.Good.
“I want him gone, Mick,” I said, making my intentions as clear as day as I stared the old man down. I didn’t want there to be any confusion. “He gets nothing extra, we give nothing but the bare minimum, and I want him gone. I don’t care what the fuck it takes. I don’t want West McNamara making it a fucking year here.”
“Now, I know you got a bunch of hurt feelin’s invested—”
“I’m not fucking hurt,” I scoffed. “I’m fucking pissed. This is bullshit. You know it and I know it.”
“—but you’re startin’ to sound a lot more like Harrison McNamara than Jacob Myles,” Mickey finished. His entire expression hardened at the mention of my father.Fuck.“Your daddy was good man, boy, and I know you got a good heart in there too. I don’t give a flyin’ fuck how hurt you are over the shit that went down between you and West. You’re a Myles, and your daddy would be rollin’ in his grave if he thought you were tryin’ to set that boy up to fail. Tryin’ to cheat him out of what he’s earned.”
“He hasn’t earned shit.”
“And you don’t know the full fuckin’ story,” he snapped. “You think you knew Harrison McNamara but you didn’t, boy. You think you know everythin’ about West McNamara, but you don’t, boy. I suggest you get that thick head of yours out of your ass before he shows up here. If he don’t cause trouble, neither should you. And I ain’t sayin’ more than that.”
He slapped his knees as he stood, groaning the whole way. My scowl couldn’t have been any deeper as I watched him meander down my front porch.What the hell did he mean by the full story?
What the hell did Mickey know that I didn’t?
CHAPTER 05
Somewhere between drowning incheap whiskey and knowing I needed to go, I forced myself to drive to Double Arrow. It took me forever to pull up the dirt drive leading to the entry arch. The thing hadn’t changed in seventeen years. Knotted branches joined together to create some stupid fucking aesthetic. And that goddamn hanging sign at the top?
Double Arrow Ranch: Where Everyone is Family.
Fuck that.
I furiously smoked my way through another cigarette while I stared at that goddamn sign. I couldn’t bring myself to drive under it. I needed to but fuck. I knew what was waiting for me down that drive.
Memories. Memories of shit I didn’t want to go back to. My life had been fucking hell since I ran to get away from Harrison. I’d accepted that my life was crap. I’d accepted just how fucking broken and worthless I was. I made do with working to get by, staying alone, and keeping my head down.
And never looking back.At least, trying not to look back. Sometimes, I couldn’t help but wonder if my past would catch up to me.
It did, and fuck me, I’d never be ready for it. All I needed to do was keep my head down, do my fucking job, and survive the year. I could do that. Would probably take copious amounts of alcohol, but I could do it.
I hoped to hell I could do it.
The main drive beyond the ranch entrance wound through a thick patch of trees and opened up to the main fields. It split three ways. That first path on the right would’ve taken me right up to Myles’ house. I’d leave that path alone. Considering Jackson had taken over, there was no doubt that it was his house now. I didn’t need any part of pissing him off just by existing in more of his space than necessary.
The middle drive went straight back to the stables. The whole ranch branched out from there. Fields for cattle, the barn, equipment storage, employee living, and everything else. It was the most traveled path of the three.