Page 29 of Lonely Hearts Day

I stepped out of his arms with a little laugh. “Yes, I’m very lovable.” I pointed to the stairs. “I left something up there.”

“What?” he asked, seeming to know I was looking for an excuse to be away from him. To cool down.

“Your mom,” I said, rushing up the stairs.

I heard his laugh behind me and wondered if, like always, he knew exactly what just happened. If he did, would he say something? Would he tell me that he had felt nothing? That he’d stop hugging me if I was going to catch feelings? That my reactions were probably just in response to the year I’d been having anyway? I wanted none of those things to happen so avoidance was the only answer. I didn’t need another reason to hate Valentine’s Day.

His mom wasn’t at the top of the stairs, of course, but my mom was.

When my parents had separated, my mom stayed in the house. My dad moved into a little one-bedroom apartment across town that didn’t even have a room for me to stay in. Sometimes I slept on the couch, but for the most part, when we spent time together, we went out to eat or he cooked for me on that small apartment stove, and then I went home. I’d thought that having to live in an apartment alone would’ve had him reevaluating his feelings for Mom. But so far, it hadn’t.

He was thriving in that tiny space, it seemed. He’d tell me about some hike he went on. Apparently, he was a hiker now, something Mom didn’t like to do. I’d always point out that he could’ve done more things without her. Marriage wasn’t the death of self. He’d say that priorities got in the way. I’d think,good thing you got your priorities in order now.I’d never say that last thing out loud because I wanted Dad to want to come home. There were only so many snarky things I could say in a visit before I’d drive an even bigger wedge between us.

“You ready for tonight?” Mom asked now, a smile on her face. “The food and decorations look good.”

“Jack says it looks like a vampire threw up down there,” I said.

She laughed.

“You’re not going out tonight?” Maybe Dad had been waiting for tonight. For Valentine’s Day, to make a grand gesture. It was a good day for those. The flicker in my chest grew stronger.

“No, honey,” she said. “I’m not.” If a grand gesture was in the works, she wouldn’t know yet.

“Well, I just needed to grab the...” A stack of white napkins sat on the counter. Not the ones I bought for the party but I picked them up and held them in the air like they were exactly what I was looking for.

Instead of going back downstairs, I went to the bathroom, shut myself inside and breathed deep for a few moments.

“Hey, Scarlett,” Mom said at the door. I thought maybe she was going to say something encouraging, comforting, but instead she said, “Jack’s brother is at the door.”

Topher and Jack couldn’t have been more different. Topher was stalky and muscular where Jack was tall and lean. Topher had light eyes to Jack’s hazel and hair that looked like it belonged to a Greek god—all wavy and voluminous. Okay, they had similar hair. But Topher never smiled, and he was so negative. Always finding the worst thing to say in every situation. When Jack was around, I was relaxed, myself. With Topher I was tense, on edge. Like now at the door.

“Hey, loser,” he said. “Where’s my brother?”

“What do you need?” I asked.

“Not you,” he said, stepping past me and looking around.

“He’s downstairs,” I said, hoping this would be a quick encounter.

I followed him down.

Jack must’ve heard us coming because before we made it down, he said in his teasing voice, “Why did you run out of here?”

When Topher appeared, his smile fell from his face. Topher took in the room and barked out a laugh. “This is the infamous party? It looks like it was decorated by an eighth grader.”

Like always, Jack didn’t respond. He just patiently waited.

“Dad said he gave you money for some supplies. I’m supposed to get the change.”

“There was no change,” I said. “Don’t you have a job?”

He was nineteen now, graduated last year.

“Was I talking to you, Red?” He thought it was funny when he called me a different shade of my name.

I looked at Jack to see if he was going to say anything but he just gave me the expression that said,let it go. He was tense around his brother too. I could see it in his stiff shoulders and clenched jaw.

Topher walked over to the counter and picked up a cookie, taking a bite. “You have nothing?” he asked, spitting crumbs.