Page 2 of Loving You Always
“He’s okay.” Jo crossed one long leg over the other, leaning one elbow on the back of the seat. “Like you. Like me. Managing the pain, I guess. The baby helps…”
Walsh narrowed his eyes against the glare of horror in Jo’s gaze when she realized what she had let slip. Caution, too late, tightened Jo’s lips.
“Ah, that awkward moment when you realize the woman I love is pregnant with my best friend’s baby.”
“You know about…”
“That Kerris is pregnant? Yeah, I know.”
“And you’re okay?”
A bitter imitation of a laugh spilled across Walsh’s lips. His heartbeat quickened. Probably because of the hot poker slicing through it when he considered Kerris having Cam’s baby.
“Do I have a choice?” He pulled himself out of his own ass long enough to note the sadness filling Jo’s eyes. Separate from grief. Personal. “And you?”
“What about me?” Jo jerked a shade down over her pretty face, cording off her emotions beyond his reach.
“Do you still love Cam?”
He was a son of a bitch for asking her that, but they hadn’t discussed her feelings for Cam since the eve of his wedding to Kerris. Inquiring minds wanted to know.
Jo raised her brows and sat up in her seat, scooting to the edge. She rested her elbows on the armrests and impaled him with the blaze of her silvery eyes.
“I don’t poach.”
Just a few words, but a recrimination. A condemnation. A judgment he deserved. He clenched his jaw around shame and guilt and the defiant words that still, after everything he’d promised himself he’d forget about Kerris, lay on the tip of his tongue. Their eyes and wills dueled across the small space separating them until Jo eased the haughty lines of her face into something softer. A distant cousin of sympathy.
“What do you want me to say, Walsh? Do I have feelings for Cam? Probably for the rest of my life, if the last fifteen years are anything to go by. Would I ever do anything about them?” She shook her head, but held his eyes steady. “No.”
How he missed those absolutes. Those black and white certainties that didn’t account for tornadic emotion sweeping through and ripping at your convictions until they were negotiable with the promise of the thing you wanted more than life itself. He didn’t say that. He barely breathed, lest he reveal how shaky his foundations were even now when it came to Kerris. Having her. Taking her. Keeping her for himself.
After spending time with his father for the last month, one thing he’d realized was that he was more like him than he had ever suspected. They shared more than dark hair and green eyes. Like his father, a predator lay in wait inside of him, relishing the hunt and capture. That beast would possess, careless of the consequences. With that legacy living inside him, he wasn’t sure he could ever be around Kerris and Cam again.
Jo stood up and settled beside him on the desk, pushing her shoulder into his.
“They’re happy. I want you to be happy.”
Walsh leaned his head against hers, reaching for her hand. Letting himself be soothed by the familiarity of the closeness they had always shared.
“Besides,” Jo continued, looking up at him with her smart aleck grin. “This is much tooDawson’s Creek. Do youwantto be Pacey in this scenario?”
Walsh laughed outright, slipping his arm around her slim shoulders. How had he forgotten how Jo made him laugh?
Suddenly the laughter melted from her voice and her eyes.
“Don’t be Pacey. Joey’s not worth it.”
“What do you have against Joey?”
“She could never make up her mind and jerked those poor guys around for years. I hate indecisive women.”
“Don’t hate her, Jo. Kerris, I mean. It’s not her fault.”
“Who should I blame?” Jo glanced at the rose gold ALOR strapped around her slim wrist and picked up her clutch. “We were fine before she showed up.”
“No, they were fine before I showed up.”
Even after Jo had gathered her things and headed off for her front-row runway seats, Walsh echoed that statement back to himself.